handy!

For the pathetically lazy, OCD loser in your life…and yes, we all have one. I would hope it’s relatively self-explanatory, even to them; if not, they’re too dumb to be having sex, even with themselves. They should not be encouraged.

masturbation kit

A fine product from lovehoneyUK, via Nerdapproved.

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12 thoughts on “handy!

  1. Metro says:

    Nice. Does it come with instructions, d’yer think? I thought the AMA was something totally different.

  2. Metro says:

    Mme points out that the kit has a major flaw for those dumb enough to require it:

    Use of the condom along with the target is bound to lead to disappointment.

  3. raincoaster says:

    I’m okay with disappointing these fellows. If they associate sex with a sense of pointlessness, it’ll almost be like they’re actually dating!

  4. Henry Rollins’ set uses an FBI pistol target . . . . .

  5. There seems to be a theme developing here – - – :)

  6. raincoaster says:

    I would have thought a picture of Cheney.

    Heck, it’s Henry. I’ll be the first to give the man a hand.

  7. Metro says:

    Raincoaster clearly has no idea how the mind works. In nunneries and monasteries across the continent, pictures of Cheney are used to remind everyone of their vows of chastity.

    There is in fact no known case of anyone having an orgasm within 8 feet of an image of Cheney, or within half-a-mile of the real thing. However, the suicide rate spikes wherever he goes.

  8. There’s a flaw to your thesis, Metro.

    Vampires can’t be photographed.

  9. raincoaster says:

    Metro clearly has no idea that Henry Fucking Rollins can get it up anywhere, under any circumstances. He’s not human.

  10. Metro says:

    I don’t care who Henry’s schtupping, I defy anyone to gaze upon that glazed, icy stare, that curled lip, and get serious wood.

    Unless sharp point and a mallet are involved somewhere.

    Lynn Cheney reportedly came out after realizing that her mother must have comitted The Act with Dick (and allegedly his) at least twice.

  11. raincoaster says:

    Henry Rollins would not only come on Cheney’s face, but Cheney would then dissolve, like the Wicked Witch of the West.

  12. As Raincoaster gushes over him . . .

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