Don’t you just hate it when you’re minding your own business, just taking your deer out for a walk, and suddenly one little thing sets off the mob and things go all Quentin Tarantino on you? Someone call a recently-reemployed screenwriter and get them on this right away: it’s a soon-to-be-classic, can’t-fail romcom featuring Hayden Panettiere as the ditsy socialite India Vanderhoof and Michael Cera as Fred Fogg, the waiter with a heart of gold, starring in the guaranteed worldwide box office smash Bringing Up Bambi!

All the way from Winston-Salem, North Carolina:

Witnesses eating lunch Sunday at TJ’s Deli in Winston-Salem were startled when they said a woman walking a pet deer on a leash lost control of the animal, causing it to break through a window and run amok through the restaurant’s dining room…

The deer, which witnesses described as a 120 to 140-pound doe, finally ran through the kitchen and out the back door.

No one was injured in the melee, and there’s no word on why the woman had the deer or if charges would be filed against her.”We might add deer jerky (to the menu),” Fogg said laughing

Who should I call about this…Pixar? Steve, Steve, we need to talk.

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