Why Online Dating Never Works Out
22 Feb 2009 32 Comments
in Blogging, Culture, Dating, Entertainment, Etiquette, Humour, Lush Life, Sex, Singles, Weird, YouTube, Zeta Males, beauty, computers, drugs, geek, goth, humor, sad
Because this is where it starts, people. And it doesn’t get any prettier from there.
On the plus side, he does say you can still fuck other guys when you’re dating him. Because…well…you’d probably prefer to.
Feb 22, 2009 @ 11:50:11
That tail hanging down his face looks like a rat should be on the other end.
He should know that when you’ve got a come-on that good, it helps to mention the money right away.
Feb 22, 2009 @ 11:53:15
Yep, we can only hope his next attempt on lavalife is informed by the feedback.
And how do you know there ISN’T a rat sitting on the back of his neck right now? It would explain why he looks so uncomfortable.
Feb 22, 2009 @ 12:09:04
This just *can’t* be for real. My guess is he’s going for YouRube or FAILblog fame. DateFAIL.
Feb 22, 2009 @ 12:26:27
He wins. You can see his other videos on YouTube if you want, though. Judge for yourself how much you can stand.
Feb 22, 2009 @ 17:03:49
Oh my God. Another reason that Jim HAS to outlive me. I don’t think I could stand sifting through all the losers like that poor schmuck in a search for another person to live with.
I mean, the first qualification he mentions is a 6 inch penis, like that is something good (?) is that erect or unerect, anyway? but then we probably aren’t hot enough to get it up. Hon, you aren’t hot enough for me to WANT to try to get it up.
oy.
Feb 22, 2009 @ 20:45:50
that’s bad. it’s not good and sad. really… it’s so sad. :(
Feb 23, 2009 @ 00:57:28
What’s even sadder is, I bet he DID get a girlfriend out of it.
Feb 23, 2009 @ 15:19:54
I would feel sorry for the parents but we haven’t seen who or what inspired his hairstyle..
Feb 23, 2009 @ 17:06:24
Oh I love this. I have to steal it. You know that right?
Feb 24, 2009 @ 05:16:24
By all means. Do you want his number, too?
Feb 24, 2009 @ 17:03:02
No way. Some dominatrix with a questionable moral compass is going to snatch this boy right up and go the his uncle then everyone he has had contact with is going to be a suspect.
Feb 25, 2009 @ 02:33:06
Well, yes. But he probably would LIKE being a slave, so in a way it’s a happy ending!
Feb 25, 2009 @ 05:00:35
Not for the uncle. You know no dominatrix is going to be content waiting thirty to forty years to collect. The uncle is toast.
Feb 25, 2009 @ 08:27:24
True. Uncle should employ a food taster ASAP
Feb 25, 2009 @ 23:55:22
I have to say, this guy has got one thing going for him that I’ve heard damn near every woman state is a primary trait in a man. Honest. Blunt, brutal, removing-hair-with-the-bandage kind of honesty. I mean he sheds the light on topics that most don’t even glance at until the third date. Mental illness doesn’t usually come up over the bread and salad on the first date (the classically accecptable time is during arraignment).
Feb 26, 2009 @ 01:27:02
I think you are confusing honesty with boundary issues.
Feb 26, 2009 @ 21:29:34
I think you are confusing cause and effect.
Feb 27, 2009 @ 01:46:07
You two should start a he said/she said dating column!
Feb 27, 2009 @ 02:44:26
I can’t give dependable advice unless I know more than most are willing to share, so I’d probably have to stick with the humuorously-bad advice. Every once in a bit I’d come up with some insightful and sincere advice though, and most people would complain about “not getting the joke.” That would be my favorite part of the job. :)
Feb 27, 2009 @ 02:51:34
Oh, I didn’t say it would be good advice! It would, however, be funny advice!
Feb 27, 2009 @ 10:00:18
Oh Valar is too serious and intent it would never work.
Feb 27, 2009 @ 11:12:05
Opposites attract. And we could expense some booze, that will help.
Feb 28, 2009 @ 03:46:29
We literalists are always taken too seriously.
Feb 28, 2009 @ 10:00:18
I am always saying that!
Feb 28, 2009 @ 17:49:01
I wouldn’t date him. Not even if he was the last person on Earth..
Mar 01, 2009 @ 01:45:18
As long as he doesn’t get elected president, he probably won’t be, so you’re safe.
Mar 01, 2009 @ 02:34:03
Well,I never thought of starting with the line “Hi I have a six inch penis”…
I give him a gold star for novelty.
Mar 01, 2009 @ 05:21:59
What he isn’t saying is, it’s in his mom’s freezer.
Mar 02, 2009 @ 23:45:06
Does he keep them next to his set of 36 C’s?
Mar 03, 2009 @ 05:48:14
No, you can see those right there on the video. He’s got boobs to rival Jessica Simpson.
Mar 03, 2009 @ 15:28:24
Woah, THEY should start a dating advice column!