Quiz: How Long Would it Take You to Become Infected from a Zombie Bite?

The Zombie Bite Calculator

Created by Oatmeal

This is after having been bitten. But of course I would not be. Because I know you stay OUT of the mall and head INTO the swimming pool, duh. Zombies hate water more than Persian cats do. Everybody knows that, but I’ll be the only one to remember it come Zombiepocalypse, you wait and see.

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16 thoughts on “Quiz: How Long Would it Take You to Become Infected from a Zombie Bite?

  1. An hour and a half. That should give me long enough to agonize dramatically before I turn the flamethrower on you, then the shotgun on myself. Sorry, but it’ll just have to be done.

  2. Everyone knows zombies are best handled using a shotgun or chainsaw, however a flamethrower will do in a pinch.

    Silver bullets are for werewolves.

    You’re clearly having genre identity issues.

  3. You know, I’d started a response to that last when I suddenly thought “₤µ©λ it. She knows she’s just being annoying to get my goat and cause me to reply with another comment.”

    Well I’m not falling for your little Rain(coaster)-dear games! I deleted my reply and won’t be posting it. So nyeeeah!

  4. Well I’m safe for an hour and five minutes. And it is wooden stakes which are used on zombies. Preferably while they are sleeping in their coffins. How Goth is a luxury coffin as a bed? Sheesh, why don’t you kids go back to the original books?

  5. Oh for GOD’s sake. Stakes are used on Vampires: ash stakes specifically. And while you’ve got them pinned you have to cut the head off and stuff the mouth with garlic.

    Shit, am I the ONLY PERSON who knows this shit? I should start a consultancy.

  6. Pingback: How Long Would It Take You To Become Infected From A Zombie Bite? « Ærchies Archive – The Curmudgeon’s Magazine

  7. You’d last 1 hour and 19 minutes before becoming infected!

    I didn’t even know that zombies bite. Oh wait, they eat you, right? Would they stop after just one bite? I think I’m confused.

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