Things it is not fair to post when I’m on a diet

This:

English breakfast pizza, om to the nom nom

I am not seeing any black pudding in that

via NegevRockCity and Slice

English. Breakfast. Pizza.

I’m serious, people, DON’T DO THIS TO ME! I’m fat-and-carb deprived and currently subsisting entirely off a diet somewhat lower down the food chain than a goldfinch, and it makes me cranky. We don’t have to review what happened the last time I went on a diet, do we?

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22 thoughts on “Things it is not fair to post when I’m on a diet

  1. Does this mean you never click on my Sevilla Tapas “live tapas” Twitpics? How long is this wretched diet going to last?

    Oh, and that pizza looks vile! Unless maybe you rolled it up…

  2. Oh, I love English breakfasts, so I’d take a stab at this. I like anchovies, so why not kippers? They’re like bacon, only with fish.

    The diet is going to last until I lose twenty pounds and at least one letter of the alphabet from my bra size. I’m getting up into the rare consonants now, and I don’t like it.

    Actually, the diet is too extreme to last, but I am willing to tough it out for ten pounds or so. I’m working out as well and will gradually get back to a more balanced diet, I’m just DAMN TIRED OF BEING FAT. I shouldn’t be this fat. I honestly have daydreams that they find a big tumor and cut it out and yay, all the weight comes off! But the struggle is just abnormal, so among other reasons my doctor has ordered about 25 different tests and I’m going for an ultrasound Tuesday. We shall see.

  3. From someone who recently released a European cake post (plus dumpling) in her own blog:

    Hey awesome, that you are depriving yourself. :)
    If you ever want to go on a bike ride, let me know ok. After all, I write about cycling, food (pretty minor topic) and stuff.

    Some real-life suggestions for pizza toppings (I make my own focaccia dough. It’s the only thing I bake these past few yrs.):

    sun-dried tomatoes (make sure they are rehydrated and chopped up)
    fresh basil, garlic, onions, red peppers.

    I do a dessert focaccia too:
    fresh raspberries, blueberries, blackberries or grapes (eat within 15 min. of doneness, berries will burst with warm yumminess)
    flavour before popping in oven with: cinnamon, abit of nutmeg, fresh ginger root crushed anissed or finely minced/crushed lemongrass. Lace with honey for sweetening. Bake.

    There’s a new culinary world, raindrop out there…forever.

  4. Deep-fried Mars bar sounds awesome, actually. I’ve always wanted to try it. I think the only reason the Brits aren’t fatter is they get drunk and puke it all up at least twice a week.

    Those sound fantastic, Jean, but at the moment I’m on No Flour either. I’m using zucchini strips as pasta, and it works pretty well, since neither zucchini nor pasta has an actual flavour. And thank god berries are in season, because I’m having a bowl of berry salad the size of my HEAD every day. Tomatoes, too: I’ve been craving tomatoes.

    I know this can’t last, and I don’t intend it to, but I did want to break with the burger and fries, beer, Scotch, deep-fried-whatever foods I have been eating. After a few weeks on this, I’ll have dropped some weight and added some muscle thanks to the exercise, and can then get back to a sensible diet, which is of course neither extreme. I know where that balance is, I just want to get a bit of visible progress first, for motivation.

  5. I see. Ask your doctor if you would benefit from low glycemic diet. I had a near diabetes 2 reading for my blood test.

    Anyone who has met me..even slim people could/do get diabetes 2. So in the past 2-3 years, I’ve drastically cut back my white rice consumption and heavier pasta consumption. I grew up on rice, and used to have rice for dinner nearly 80% time for dinner. Now it’s only 2-3 times per month. Bread, I am careful to eat alot less or at least earlier in the day when I can burn it off.

    Both my family physician and plus a sister-doctor physician advised same accordingly. Sister-doctor herself lost 50 lbs. by ramping up her jogging frequency and swinging towards low-GI diet.

    I do eat sweets..which is a problem ..when 25 years ago it was not part of my diet. I wasn’t raised that way.

    Best wishes with your diet adventures. And when you see a fit person..it doesn’t come naturally. It does require eating mindfully each day/week. And finding a sport that you love to do. Sounds like you love rollerblading.

    I can’t even ice skate much. much less roller blade.

  6. I’ve been tested repeatedly for diabetes, and am going to be re-tested on Monday, in fact. The diet I’m on right now is essentially low-GI because it bans flour, salt and sugar. Hard to get much unhealthy stuff if you’re adhering to that. The only noodles I’m eating now are made from mung beans, which means they’re carb and protein, and low-GI.

    I love rollerblading, but when I got my skates out to go skating, there was MOLD in them. Yay, how I love living in this climate. Time for a new pair of skates, if I can make some money on my courses this year.

    I know what it takes to get fit, I just need to DO it; maybe not another marathon, but a 10k by the year’s end for sure.

  7. rain,

    I’ve been having a similar issue with my weight and honestly I was baffled for a long time. I have had a new theory after reading a book from michael pollan that corn is to blame. Now I don’t eat a lot of corn in it’s natural form, however everything the we touch nowadays has some form of corn based product lurking in it. Meat, cereals, even some drinking water.. Our bodies just can’t assimilate this stuff apropriately. I have been working on switching over to a local based food system and watching out for key words in what I buy. I’m sure this won’t be enough by itself to lose the 20lbs or so that I need to take off, but I do believe it will help me and my family live a healthier life. That pizza though… Uggh.. None for me thanks :) good luck with your tests, I sincerely hope that nothing serious is going on…

  8. Thanks. Corn? that’s not my problem. I rarely eat processed foods, and rarely eat corn (like, once a year?) so whatever it is doesn’t have that in it. I don’t believe there’s one “Devil food” out there, I’m just eliminating all the things that do not actively contribute to my health, including alcohol and sources of pure calories like flour and sugar.

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  10. Now that is a pizza! I have had some quirky toppings before, but baked beans? I once ordered a breakfast pizza from the local pizza shop. Yes, it was early morning and we were looking for pizza. The pizza came with scrambled eggs, bacon, hash browns, and cheese. It was pleasantly delicious.

  11. Thanks. I am getting to like this, but thinking of my old dream of an adaptation of the theme “Bus full of hippies” only with tentacles instead of honeysuckle vines. Hmmm.

    I had a breakfast burrito today. Now even our FOOD is a mashup.

  12. 3 weeks late (see *NB): Corn, cornfusion. Just had my Chili-wack peaches and cream. (corn on the cob for those of you that don’t know) The ‘young’ fella that sold them to Kat and I threw in a sample of ‘jubilee’, a revised heritage breed, “one for each of you LADIES”. Sweet! He hardly knew us, but Whalley (Surrey, BC) is a easy judge. I hope the Michael earlier looked up about corn and its’ place. Just prior to this purchase we stopped for meat. The T-bones looked good but the New Yorks called our name … kat … lyd… pick me! We did. Then I saw ‘SPECIAL’. Over I skiddled. ‘Silver Fish’ $3.99/lb. We tried to explain why this might deter sales. What could we call them? She (the very affable Korean lady) affably thought the Chinese had it right. Silver fish they were. Shimmy shimmy coco bonk! On to the LCB just off the King George. But I digress. I searched for this post to say “Don’t throw out your skates unless they’re wrecked or worn out!” I found a product I have been meaning to pass on to you at least before the damp sets in. It’s called CONCROBIUM. $10.00/l with a good mister. Overall coverage is 200-400-sq.ft. Your place needs it. I used it in the van we don’t use much, the boat and trailer. Impressive! The *NB was finding the post that mentioned the skates that needed to be de-moulded!

  13. Yes, I see the silver fish at T&T all the time and ALWAYS think they really should change the name.

    Concrobium is a helluva name, but ten bucks is a lot cheaper than a new pair of rollerblades! I shall take a look; you’re damn right my place needs a de-moulder.

    Don’t be a stranger: I’m getting a phone that will work through my computer, so that’ll be cool. I’ll call you on it once I get it working.

  14. I hate to toot a company that I don’t have shares in but, I’m looking into it! Since I don’t tweet, I’ll be glad of a phone line. PS this product is available at thee ol’ tire store and household depot. When you read its’ properties (and I pre-tested for you) it will speak to you. LAKTF, Lydia

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