Category Archives: Celebrity

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TwitPic of the Day: Enter the Dragon

Er, so to speak, you understand. So to speak.

BoJo: Enter the Dragon

BoJo: Enter the Dragon

via Azahar

Now that’s a physical specimen to put the fear of god into Ryan Reynolds, eh? How majestic, how magnificent. How much energy went into getting this body in motion? The mind: it boggleth.

Never change, Boris. Never change.

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picture this

Aung San Suu Kyi

Aung San Suu Kyi

I’ve often wondered whether Nobel Prize Winner Aung San Suu Kyi would have risen to global fame (and a Nobel) if she hadn’t been beautiful. Yes, people think about these things. Well, you knew that. But some people talk about them, too, which is slightly more fraught.

John Molloy, the guy who wrote all those Dress for Success books in the early 80′s, said there was a greater correlation between the monetary success of Harvard grads and their height than there was between their success and their grades. We perceive good-looking people to be not just more attractive, but more intelligent, more diligent, and more moral than their homely peers. Those who listened to the Kennedy/Nixon debate on the radio felt Nixon had won, while those who saw it on television felt almost unanimously that Kennedy had trounced Richard “Flopsweat” Nixon.

And all this is not to say that she (and Kennedy, and those lanky Harvard grads) don’t deserve what they’ve gotten; it’s rather to say that beauty is power. And sometimes it’s hard not to resent that. While I’m glad to see it put to use for the cause of good here, how often has it been used to slip something by us that we should have stopped? How often, on the global stage, have we been desensitized and made victims by the presence of sheer physical beauty?

Today I don’t have any answers. I just hope I’m asking the right questions.

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Wikileaks 1: Mainstream Media, um, 1

Whatchoolookinat?

Whatchoolookinat?

It’s a tale told in tweets, a very Twenty-First Century tale, for lo, it is all about recycling, Wikileaks, Russia, Orwellian paranoia, US online surveillance, and the Mainstream Media vs the New Media (remember the New Media? This is it. Are we vindicated or embarrassed?).

In other words, this is what my editors over at the DailyDot.com did NOT decide to run with my latest Wikileaks story, so I’m using it here, so there.

They took out all my wacky Cold War jokes, too, damnation! What’s an article about Russia and the US without a few tasteless Cold War jokes thrown in? Whodathunk a few references here or there to Google’s info-capitalist hegemony would get people in Silicon Valley so touchy?

Our story begins:

which comes from the head of RT, the network which has just picked up Julian Assange‘s new talk show. I repeat: JULIAN ASSANGE’S NEW TALK SHOW.

and translates thusly:

The AFP has issued a note that Assange goes with us. Are mixed there, I went to a meeting withthe explosive, and about the alpha male, and about YES:) #chistyytresh

to which we can only reply:

This might actually convince me to get cable. I’ll just let Twitter tell the rest of the story.

and from my former boss at True/Slant, now in charge of the front page of the NYT.com,

Well, you KNOW there’s no way I’m taking THAT lying down.

Canuckistani Revolutionary

Canuckistani Revolutionary

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Kim Jong Il: welcome to Antenora

Kim Jong Il my urine will bring us victory

Kim Jong Il my urine will bring us victory

There’s no use wishing Kim Jong-Il will rest in peace, because that would be the farthest thing from justice this or any other world could perpetrate. If it weren’t such a long walk, I’d put my dancing shoes on for this. Instead, in keeping with my new mantle of professionalism, I have decided to make this exclusive photojournalism report on Kim Jong-Il‘s journey to Antenora, the Second Round of the Ninth Circle of Hell. First, let’s remember the Beloved Leader as he was in life:

Yep, that’s pretty much it. Now direct to our exclusive coverage, featuring pix from those intrepid photogs over at the World’s Suddenly Least Purposeful Blog, KimJongIlLookingAtThings.

Continue reading →

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Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaand CUT!

Viggo Peaces Out

Viggo Peaces Out

Strangest direction to an actor ever?

‘You’re not walking like a Jew, Viggo.’

Let’s review:

Well, my first choice for Jew Demonstrating Jewish Walking is a washout, alas, but it did turn me on to one of the greatest websites of all time: JewOrNotJew!

For reference, this walk is virtually part Jewish almost most of the time.

This one is a safe fallback:

Note red carpet, velvet ropes, and soundtrack. Hmmm, is Kanye Jewish too?

Oh, and in reference to the title, if you want to know if Viggo‘s circumsized, you can get The Indian Runner, which has several seconds of full-frontal Viggo. Some frames of which have been moderately photoshopped.

Viggo with muppets

Viggo with muppets by Michaelangelo okay not really.