Bar fight in R’lyeh!

bar fight in R'lyeh!

bar fight in R'lyeh! art by Frederic Clavere

Normally, Cthulhu and his family are charming hosts, but sometimes Junior gets into the nước mắm and the next thing you know the tentacles are flying! It’s hard enough making small talk when only half the guests are amphibious.

Cthulhu visits the Victorians en route to His voracious victory!

Cthulhu visits the Victorians en route to His voracious victory!

“How about them uppity natives, eh? Oh, I hear ya! I totally feel your pain, dude.”

The guest list included only the highest social stratum. Here’s this year’s hot couple posing happily just moments before the melee broke out.

The Whaleses

The Whaleses

I always thought he could do better, myself. I tried introducing him to some of those delightful Marsh women and their cousin, that Munn woman, but it was a no-go. And why? The girl is clearly talented.

Olivia Munn be desperate

Olivia Munn be desperate

and desperate. But then, many of us remember the last big family party, when she and her cousin Ralsa broke up the dance floor back in ’08.

Click over the jump for a roundup of the other Cthelebrity guests. Get your partying in now, people. Remember, the Crapture is coming!

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Deep One washed ashore in Rio!

Deep One by Christopher Burdett: although in conversation she could be quite shallow

Deep One by Christopher Burdett: although in conversation she could be quite shallow

Shocking video evidence of the survival of a colony of Dagon-worshipping Deep Ones just off Leblon Beach, Rio de Janeiro. Also shocking video evidence not all Brazilians look good in a bikini.

And YES I know we’ve been all about the videos lately, but what can I say? YouTube has been particularly awesome lately, what with dead squirrels, Yellowknifers, and gravity-bedevilled gilled monstrosities of the deep.

The Truth About Hillary Clinton!

Hillary Clinton cannot be captured in photographs!

Hillary Clinton cannot be captured in photographs!

Oh, the lamestream media has gotten their greedy, cover-uppy little claws on this shocking photoevidence and their appallingly tepid attempts to spin are fully steaming ahead. According to the Daily What (part of the shady icanhascheezburger network, and are we really sure Rupert Murdoch doesn’t have his fingers in that pie? Hmmmmm?) this series of pictures shows that cultist Israelites made Hillary Clinton vanish from a photo she was in.

Au contraire, mister cheezburger, au contraire.

What it actually proves is that Secretary of State Hillary Clinton (aka Hillary Rodham, aka Hillary Rodham Clinton) cannot, outside of the carefully controlled environs of the White House PR Department, be photographed. Obviously, the top photo is the original which was mistakenly sent out on the wires, and the below, now-iconic image, is the official White House version, sent out only after artful photoshopping to make the S of S visible on film, which she normally is not.

As for conclusions, there can be only one, and it can come as no surprise to anyone who’s followed this woman’s career over the past two decades.

Hillary Clinton is of the Undead.

They took images of Ye Xiangting with other people. They were stunned when the other people showed up in the computer images, but not Ye. Ye Xiangting seemed to have “disappeared” from the photos. In the end, the staff had to give up.
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…Maybe he’s a vampire? vampire

Posted by Jackie  on  Fri Jan 13, 2006  at  01:56 PM


No, Jackie, I don’t think he is.Since he is Chinese, if he was a vampire, he would bounce up and down or across the countryside like a kangaroo. There’s no mention of that in the article.

Logical.

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Does anyone have a decoder ring handy?

Notes from Buenos Aires from our old blog buddy John Cusack

Notes from Buenos Aires from our old blog buddy John Cusack

John Cusack, you’re a nut. I love you. Never change. But in future, could you provide Cusack to English translations of your notes? Thanks, signed, a grateful planet.

Besides. everyone knows pigs can fly, but they need to be in a proper kennel and stored under the seat in front of you. Duh.

Now that we’ve got that cleared up, here are the celebrity gossip links for today.

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