Arthur: the Maritime Edition

that's all CGI

that’s all CGI

You know what the cushiest job in the world is? The cushiest job in the world is the Vancouver television weather presenter. You put on a Gore-tex jacket, stand in front of a green screen and intone, “Partly overcast, with chance of precipitation.” One take and you’re done. The wizards in IT swap in a different background every day, but until it actually snows, and you have to do another take wearing polar fleece, you’re done for the year.

By way of contrast, you know who’s the hardest-working personality in the weather video world?

FRANKIEEEE MACDONALD from SYDNEY NOVA SCOTIA!!!

Here he is in July 3rd video predicting today’s shitstorm in New Brunswick. You can’t say that man doesn’t put his heart into it and cover all the bases. Repeatedly. With Chinese Food and Coke. And Chinese Food and Coke. And Pepsi.

And for bonus points, check out how swiftly the commenters see off the haters. Truly, if YouTube comments having you doubting for the future of the human race, read some of the comments on Frankie’s vids to have your faith restored.

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Operation Global Media Domination: The Bright Side of the Dark Side

The Dark Lord welcomes you, recruit

The Dark Lord welcomes you, recruit

Before there was Voldemort, there was Vader. And before there was Vader, the world knew another as “The Dark Lord,” and I’m not even talking about Conrad Black.

He lives yet.

In fact, he owns Gawker.

And today, he broke me.

After how many years of me refusing to write for him for free (while still contributing thousands of words a week in the form of snippy comments and tips) tonight I finally gave in and….Kinja‘d. Twice!

It was…scary.

But it’s about the highest-profile outlet I have since I let this poor blog peter down to virtually nothing, so I posted a couple of articles that have had, through no fault of their own, failed to find a home.

Relive the Cold War for Fun and Profit:

how the Russian government hacked the US energy industry, and why the Ukrainian uprising might make the entire three-year project entirely moot

and

Snitching for Dollars: The BSA wants you to rat out your boss!

In my own defence, it did take something like eight years to wear me down. Should the posts get zero momentum despite being on a Gawker platform, the experiment will not be repeated. While I was at it, I updated my Media and Public Speaking page. You know I’m all about Operation Global Media Domination! Now, bring me that audience!

Hail Vader! Hail Operation Global Media Domination!

Hail Vader! Hail Operation Global Media Domination!

Breaking: the Space/Irony Continuum

Stupid People

Stupid People

Headline of the day:

It’s Not OK To Be Shitty: Guy Fieri, BuzzFeed, And The Tyranny Of Stupid Popular Things

on… Continue reading

Contemporary Journalism 101: The Twitter Stalk

Please hold for Hashtag John Doe

Please hold for Hashtag John Doe

You might think it’s easy being a reporter these days, what with newspapers being so high on the hog and all. Well, kid, you’d be wrong.

It’s a dirty business, being a reporter, and don’t call me a “hack” if you don’t want a shiner that you can read a pulp novel by.

We do things. Things we can’t talk about. Things normal people would not know how to understand. It’s better that we just keep these depraved little rituals to ourselves, but you know me: can’t keep a secret. That’s why I got into this business: so people would pay me not to keep things to myself.

Things like this.

Background: State Representative Dan Gordon of Rhode Island is Anonymous’s least and best favorite State Representative, alternately promoting and trolling them. And he promised me an interview. Many. Many. Many times.

So. It comes to this.

Hey, I never said it was pretty, boys and girls.

Speaking of the War on Trolls…

trollstrollstrollstrollstrollstrollstrollstrolls

trollstrollstrollstrollstrollstrollstrollstrolls

Sooooo, yesterday I got trolled, and I fell for it, hard. That wouldn’t be so bad, but I published a story on the Daily Dot about it before we found out it was a fake. My bosses are naturally not thrilled. Without minimizing the fact I shouldn’t have swallowed it like I did, that all would be pretty horrible IF (can you keep a sikrit?):

  • news organizations weren’t constantly being trolled and then writing stories about the trolling (“rumors of X happening overnight have petered out and it now appears that X was never, in fact, going to happen” and they DON’T generally say “yeah, and we got it wrong yesterday”)
  • it had been a major news story instead of an insidery item about the sentencing of someone of whom most of our readers have never heard. Accuracy is always important but this way the spread of the original rumour was minimized, if inadvertently.
  • it had resulted in enduring consequences other than personal embarrassment (because god knows I’m long past the concept of human dignity and although my taste does not run to crow I’ve eaten a fair helping or two in my time). Think of the WMD hoax: decade-long, generation-crippling, heart-of-the-nation-sapping war. THAT is a consequence. Hell, Judith Miller went to prison for protecting her source and he turned out to be lying AND hundreds of thousands of people are dead. So yeah, downside.
  • it hadn’t resulted in me getting three exclusive interviews with VERY interesting, VERY prominent (in certain circles) people.
  • and a marriage proposal on Twitter.

So yeah, troll’s well that ends well. And as I said on Twitter, you can hardly complain about being trolled when you pull:

Selah. May the Internet Drama Fairy watch over you all and protect you from doxing.