Power to the People
Ever have one of those days where you’re all, I GAVE Peace a chance and ten years later we’re still in Afghanistan? No? Just me then?
GPOY: OccupyEverywhere Edition
Category Archives: meme
Tag, I’m It
banksy is a little tatty
It’s like climbing into the Wayback Machine and hitting “Random,” doing another of these. I haven’t done a tag/meme/questionnaire like this in literally years, and became somewhat notorious for getting tagged and giving a world-weary shrug and a heartfelt, “I’m so sorry. I’ve made it a policy not to do these; I just get so many requests, you see” which, I’m sure, earned me quite a tongue-lashing once I was good and out of earshot, and truly it was no more than I deserved.
An Internet Celebrity is the servant of her commenters, after all.
But I’m pressed for time lately, I just returned from a 60 minute walk/jog and I have my link rounups to do and then have to wake up and go to work again in 7 hours, so what the hell: it’s an easy post!
Thanks(?) to TeamOyeniyi for tagging me.
Most Beautiful Post
Then vs Now: the Decline and Fall from an Equine Perspective which is a little meditation on the way in which humanity expresses itself in the way it sees animals. And the ways in which that has NOT improved since the Romantic Era.
I remember at one Northern Voice party, everyone was invited to stand up and read out their best posts. I couldn’t read my best post, because I believe there are only 17 original-to-me words in the whole thing, counting the alt text. If your best post can be read aloud and not lose anything, you’re not blogging: you’re writing radio scripts. Later, one of the organizers said I should have stood up and said that instead.
Most Popular Post
Hmmm, depends how you analyze this. The Mummified Fairy post has over two thousand comments. The Fart Tax post was named “Best of the Web” by the Guardian in January of 2007 (it wasn’t an annual award, it was just “what’s cool today” but GOD DOESN’T IT SOUND FANTASTIC?). My About Page is the most popular thing this week, for no known reason. For a long time I was #6 on Google if you searched for Beaver Shots (mother would be SO proud). Banksy Strikes Again got more hits than any other post ever in one day: 22,000.
Most Helpful Post
Helpful. “Helpful.” I’m not quite sure what this word means, but if education is helpful I guess you could say I schooled the Albanians in the comments thread here: Review O’ The Day: AA Gill on Barnes Grill.
A Post whose success surprised me
The Banksy in Birmingham post. Whodathunk something about transgressive street art would oust Britney Spears Sex Tape as the #1 post on my blog?
Most Controversial Post
Hmm, depends if you’re Albanian or not. The only two times I got requests from lawyers to take something down were a request to remove someone’s name and address in my mirror of the LA Fitness shooter’s diary, and in a post called UK News: How to Get Away With Blowing Up Three Cars in a Huge Fireball Without Being Suspected of Terrorism. Since the fireball apparently never happened, nor the explosion, and there was no point leaving an innocent man’s name up there to draw hatred and death threats, I complied with the requests to remove the name and although I didn’t remove the second post, I did update it and make a new one explaining what really happened.
A Post that Didn’t get the Attention I felt it deserved
Ekranoplan: World’s Strangest Airplane. Okay, not everyone’s into aeroporn, but this thing is AMAZING and it was kept a complete secret until the space program found this enormous, mysterious thing that moved…but it couldn’t be a plane…but it was enormous…but how? Why? How long had these things been around? How did they move? What were they FOR?
Post I’m Most Proud Of
Date with a Devil: my account of meeting serial killer Willy Pickton. I’ve come under relentless pressure not to tell this story, from all kinds of people you’d think should support me, and I’m proud not to have been silenced. I have the right to testify to what happened to me, and if you or metafilter doesn’t like it, well, no wonder you’re Forever Alone.
Tagging Five
Oh god. Virtually anyone I tag will have tagged me at some point and been turned down. Okay, ladies and gentlemen, start your Schadenfreude. I tag TedMorrison, MomFog, NedHepburn, NecroticHijinks, and the Manolo.
Like this:
Keep Calm and Ph’nglui mglw’nafh Cthulhu R’lyeh wgah’nagl fhtagn
Keep Calm and Hail Cthulhu
I think this will look very nice painted on the wall of my new place. over and over. in human blood.
The most merciful thing in the world, I think, is the inability of the human mind to correlate all its contents. We live on a placid island of ignorance in the midst of black seas of infinity, and it was not meant that we should voyage far. The sciences, each straining in its own direction, have hitherto harmed us little; but some day the piecing together of dissociated knowledge will open up such terrifying vistas of reality, and of our frightful position therein, that we shall either go mad from the revelation or flee from the deadly light into the peace and safety of a new dark age.
Word up, yo.
Like this:
on the existence of Tumblr, of Hogwarts, and of Awesomeness
Oft and oft have I been asked the purpose of that oblique, self-referential sphere of the interwebs known as Tumblr. And as oft as I have been asked, I have either answered or have asked for cash dollars upfront. But here, ladies and gentlemen and the undecided, here at last is the justification for tumblr, laid out as plainly as the schnozz on your pan. This, my friends, cannot be topped, not even by Jake Gyllenhaal on a late and sloppy Friday night.
If you got a letter saying you were accepted at Hogwarts:
You’d look up from whatever you were doing like:
You would then spend the next couple of days like:
You would then go to diagon alley and you’d be all like:
You’d go from shop to shop like:
Then, on september 1st you’d run through the barrier on platform 9 3/4 like:
You’d meet people on the hogwarts express like:
You would realise they’re just like you and you’d be all like:
Then you would jam for the rest of the year like:
THIS post right here? This is what Tumblr was invented for.
Like this:
Vanity UnFair!
Julian Assange is no Time Lord, cancels subscription
THIS! Means! WAR!
Oh sure, it starts out as an amusing, cleverly-written quiz on VanityFair.com, but the next thing you know it’s fucking SLANDER!
Rootin' Tootin' Newtie!
Congratulations! You are Newt Gingrich: Despite strangely strong public affection for dinosaurs and space exploration and shocking contempt for the women you routinely divorce, you actually made it big in politics—15 years ago.
This is, like, SO not fair. I’m not even gay-married!
