Category Archives: Religion

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Ecumenical Holiday Unicorn Chaser Roundup

Katamari Damancy Christmas Katamari

Katamari Damancy Christmas Katamari

Christmas is coming and Hanukah is here already, so here’s an equal-time hump day Unicorn Chaser to freshen up the longest week of the year on the longest night. Light it up with this innovative, nerd-resonant solution to your seasonal decorating challenges: the Katamari Damancy Christmas … Thing.

Equal time: Zebranukah

Hanukah in black and white

Hanukah in black and white

Who says there are no Jews in Africa?

Hey, FLASHBACK TIME!

Tinfoil Christmas

Tinfoil Christmas

The thing about these tinfoil trees was you were supposed to buy one of those rotating multicoloured spotlights so it wasn’t actually prettily silver or colourless; it would throb alternately in red, blue, yellow, and green, like a pagan discotheque on Mars. If you tried to use one of these things nowadays, you’d probably scramble cellphone signals for a square kilometer around. Comedy gold.

But let’s not see it as Two Solitudes; let’s see it as partners.

Hanukah and Christmas kittehs

Hanukah and Christmas kittehs

Oh don’t they just look SO pleased to be celebrating the season together? You can’t see Druid Kitteh, as he was up in a tree at the time this photo was taken.

and, last but not least, in fact foremost in Unicorn Chaserianism, is this video of puppies playing under the tree. Awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww…

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Kim Jong Il: welcome to Antenora

Kim Jong Il my urine will bring us victory

Kim Jong Il my urine will bring us victory

There’s no use wishing Kim Jong-Il will rest in peace, because that would be the farthest thing from justice this or any other world could perpetrate. If it weren’t such a long walk, I’d put my dancing shoes on for this. Instead, in keeping with my new mantle of professionalism, I have decided to make this exclusive photojournalism report on Kim Jong-Il‘s journey to Antenora, the Second Round of the Ninth Circle of Hell. First, let’s remember the Beloved Leader as he was in life:

Yep, that’s pretty much it. Now direct to our exclusive coverage, featuring pix from those intrepid photogs over at the World’s Suddenly Least Purposeful Blog, KimJongIlLookingAtThings.

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Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaand CUT!

Viggo Peaces Out

Viggo Peaces Out

Strangest direction to an actor ever?

‘You’re not walking like a Jew, Viggo.’

Let’s review:

Well, my first choice for Jew Demonstrating Jewish Walking is a washout, alas, but it did turn me on to one of the greatest websites of all time: JewOrNotJew!

For reference, this walk is virtually part Jewish almost most of the time.

This one is a safe fallback:

Note red carpet, velvet ropes, and soundtrack. Hmmm, is Kanye Jewish too?

Oh, and in reference to the title, if you want to know if Viggo‘s circumsized, you can get The Indian Runner, which has several seconds of full-frontal Viggo. Some frames of which have been moderately photoshopped.

Viggo with muppets

Viggo with muppets by Michaelangelo okay not really.

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Steve Jobs’s Afterlife

In the current state of affairs, there is obviously one question and one question only that must be on the minds of all the most intelligent citizens of the world, be they in Ponape or Rhode Island.

Or even Cupertino.

If, indeed, Steve Jobs is/was/will be the unspeakable Elder God Cthulhu, what’s his next move?

At last, we have our answer. And it is GLORIOUS!

Cthulhu vs Thomas Kinkade

Cthulhu vs Thomas Kinkade: there's an app for that

From Gawker commenter Sugarfly McQueen:

His earthly techno-geek duties finally at an end, He’s been called to fulfill a greater purpose: destroying Thomas Kinkade pictures from the inside out.

Somewhere, Steve is chuckling. And rolling up his sleeves.

Steve Jobs ponders his next sexxxy move

Steve Jobs ponders his next sexxxy move

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Good God Celebrity Links!

Artefact by Dariusz Zawadzki

Artefact by Dariusz Zawadzki

I had one of these things. I needed it to hook up the 1990 era tv to the DVD player and the Blu Ray. On alternate nights it could pick up CBC Mars.

If you want to see what other crazy shit an unjust and potentially insane god has cooked up for you, click over the jump and see what our professional meatpuppetry is up to today. In other words, celebrity gossip links.

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