Category Archives: Sex

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Post-Hump Day Julian Assange Fluffer Unicorn Chaser

Sorry about yesterday: I was travelling and then I was pubbing and then I was sleeping. If I know my audience, you could probably use a dose of cheery-uppy videos and whatnot by this point in the week, so here you go: today’s unicorn chaser roundup

Yes, I bet you didn’t know Public Enemy #1, Information Anarchist and James Bond Villain Julian Assange was a fluffer. But now, we have the evidence:

julian assange is a hardcore fluffer

julian assange is a hardcore fluffer

What? WHAT??? He is TOO straight.

Do click on the image and read the amazing Julian Assange/Harry Potter fanfic. I got no farther than “and he reached into his pants (obviously for his mobile phone)” before losing it completely.

Speaking of gifs of hot men and losing it completely, here is a gif of Prince Harry being adorable with an adorable little kid. Ladies, fasten your ovaries, because they’re going to make a break for it.

Prince Harry is present and accounted for. My ovaries? Not so much.

Prince Harry is present and accounted for. My ovaries? Not so much.

Young Boy: The prince! Where?

Prince Harry: I’m here, it’s me. Sorry to disappoint, but it’s only me

Yeaaaaah. Winning: that’s what it really looks like, Charlie Sheen.

And now for a little dance music: Let’s Dance by Nouvelle Vague, with video from Godard’s Bande à Part. Watching Serge Gainsbourg move, you can see what Fran Lebowitz meant when she said, “People who say they’re really good at dancing mean something entirely different by it.”

And if that hasn’t satiated your appetite for mindless, soothing feel-goodism, here are the celebrity links! Aren’t you excited?!?!?!?!?!?!!?!

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Meme vs Meme

I love both of these memes, but I just can’t make up my mind which I like more. Or which I identify with more. Help me decide: is it to be Courage Wolf or Sexually Oblivious Rhino which becomes the mascot of the ol’ raincoaster blog?

Courage Wolf shits bigger than you

Courage Wolf shits bigger than you

OR

Sexually Oblivious Rhino doesn't know what you mean by that

Sexually Oblivious Rhino doesn't know what you mean by that

What say you all?

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That’ll teach YOU not to tip!

Sadface! No Happy Endings?

Sadface! No Happy Endings?

via AndreaBusse

Seriously, you call THAT a spa? Actually, I’m intrigued by the concept of a day spa for “Lady Orchids” that offers massages, and can definitely see where the confusion arose.

Georgia O'Keeffe should get that inflamed ladyflower to the gynecologist STAT

Georgia O'Keeffe should get that inflamed ladyflower to the gynecologist STAT

Once again I am confronted with the certain realization that other people are watching a completely different kind of porn from me.

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A Love Story for Our Time

Internet Love never works out

Internet Love never works out. Lavalife has a lot to answer for.

Haven’t we all had that experience? The tall, handsome, male charmer online somehow morphs, in between tweeting and meeting, into a stubby, Faces-of-Meth, hermaphroditic, spectrum disorder-having bedwetter. Oh, there may be plenty of fish out there, but YOU try getting one to make conversation over a nice entree.

 

The Booty Call of Cthulhu

The Booty Call of Cthulhu

Kate Gosselin will settle for just ANYONE.

Anybody need a stiff drink after that? Apparently I need a Bloody Mary:


You Are a Bloody Mary


You’re a fairly serious drinker who’s experimented a lot with different drinks.

You know what you like to drink, but you’re not a snob. You’ll drink anything in a pinch. 

You’re a drunk, but you are a stable drunk. You don’t ever let your drinking get out of control.

You’re the one who keeps everyone levelheaded, even if you’ve had the most to drink.

If you don’t feel like a drink but have been inspired to take quite a different kind of action, here’s the “what kind of toilet user are you” quiz that you didn’t know you were waiting for.


Your Toilet Personality is Social


You’ll go anywhere, anytime, with anyone. In fact, you secretly talk on the phone when you’re in your “office.”

For you, going to the bathroom is no big deal. And you going shouldn’t be for anyone else either. 

You don’t mind public restrooms – in fact, you sort of like the energy they bring to the act.

When you’re on the toilet, you consider yourself a bit of a performance artist.

As always, your mileage may vary. And so via natural progression to the celebrity gossip links for today.
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Sextradited! Julian Assange to be Extradited!

Julian Assange in custody. At least Swifter let him keep his cup of cocoa.

Julian Assange in custody. At least Swifter let him keep his cup of cocoa.

Well, that’s that. Julian Paul Assange, the world’s favorite Bond Villain, is headed off on an all-expenses-but-the-one-that-counts-paid trip to Sweden, courtesy of the UK court system, which ruled today that there is no human rights violation in Sweden’s choice to prosecute Assange and, further, none in their decision to do so in a private trial. You can read the whole thing below:

and download it directly from the court site, and, for the very BEST live coverage, you should have been watching Ravi Somaiya’s live twitter stream from the trial itself. Plus this:

And yes, “Sextradited” as a term will TOTALLY happen. I just wish I could remember who coined it.

UPDATE: it was AlphaKat on Gawker.

UPDATED UPDATE: And here is Assange’s statement from outside the courthouse, where he’s again free on bail:

Belmarsh was a rubber stamping process. It comes as no surprise but is nevertheless wrong. It comes as the result of a European arrest warrant system amok.

There was no consideration of the allegations made against me. No consideration of the complaints against me in Sweden.

We have always known we would appeal. We have always known in all likelihood we would have to appeal. Ninety five percent of all European arrest warrants are successful [...]

[...] What does the United States have to do with a Swedish Extradition process?

It has been falsely stated that I said the CIA or Pentagon was involved in the initial allegation. I have never said that. I have never said who was behind those allegations, simply that they were untrue.

Why is it that I am subject – a non-profit free speech activist – that I am subject to a £200,000 bail, that I am subject to house arrest when I have never been charged in any country.

The scrutiny of the European arrest warrant system needs to begin now, it cannot be the case that filling two pages with someone’s name and a suspicion – not a charge – can lead to their extradition to one of 26 European nations.

Three people a day are being extradited from the UK under a rubber stamp process.