Russell Crowe, Yowe!

An Aussie. An actor. A rocker. A rowdy. A noted student of the laws of physics as they pertain to the momentum of a thrown telephone.

Not exactly a recipe for a kindly father figure, you’d think. To everyone’s surprise, you’d be wrong, at least if you were thinking of Russell Crowe.

Thirteen-year-old Texas superfan Nicole Garcia was tweeting at and about her favorite celebrities one day (Crowe, Benedict Cumberbatch, Matt Smith, and the list goes on) when, to her surprise and amazement, one of them tweeted back. To everyone’s surprise and amazement, the exchange was perfectly adorable, and we give it here.

Crowe Tweets

But wait, there’s more!

moar tweets

The Twitter exchange was screencapped and posted to Tumblr, where it received 127,052 reblogs, likes, and comments, although the original post has now been deleted.

In case you’re wondering, she DID do her homework. Russell Crowe, your work here is done!

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Hvacrpro takes us on a Flashback to 2009

It's spam, man

It’s spam, man

Ah, AutoDM spam! That takes me back; back all the way to 2009. Mariah Carey wants to know what love is. The Glee cast found somebody to love. Alicia Keys and Jay-Z were in an Empire state of mind.

And spammers had just discovered Twitter.

The revolting Auto-DM, in which a marketer automatically privately messages some “Like us on Facebook and ask me about MLM marketing” garbage, is a noxious remnant of that time, clinging to its loathsomely recrudescent existence with brittle, shattered claws, refusing to let go, refusing to acknowledge that, in fact, it is noxious spam.

And today I got one.

Now, I’m not cruel. Okay, sometimes I’m not cruel. And people do get hacked, do authorize apps which then go bad and start DMing spam. So I generally give them a heads-up along the lines of “oh, and did you mean to send that spam?”

And so it was on Twitter today, when I got an autoDM from @Hvacrpro, a self-proclaimed “World Shaper, Media Shaker,Game Changer & Innovator’ Progressive Democratic Union Party. Love my Country, & Christian, Live2Tweet&Love2Live,Teabagger whisperer” and Blogspot blogger. Oooh, colour me impressed!

It went something like this.

5h

Hvacrpro's avatar
Hvacrpro @Hvacrpro

Hi! You can auto follow back, find unfollowers, unfollow inactive users, check for fake followers, and more FREE at bit.ly/14quajJ

3h

raincoaster's avatar
raincoaster @raincoaster

Or I could become offended by this spam

16m

Hvacrpro's avatar
Hvacrpro @Hvacrpro

spam is sales, promotion and marketing… this is not the same its an automated message, get with the times.

16m

Hvacrpro's avatar
Hvacrpro @Hvacrpro

research before u put your foot into your mouth.

16m

Hvacrpro's avatar
Hvacrpro @Hvacrpro

:P

Whereupon I unfollowed him, wondering what in the UNIVERSE had ever induced me to follow somebody who thought self-righteous spam, insults and “:P” were advanced marketing techniques.

Not exactly sure what his brand of “conservative corporatism” is meant to conserve, but I don’t know many corporations who’d be happy to admit they’d hired this loosaire.

WikiLeaks: the personal care product line

Julian Assange protect the truth condom line

Julian Assange protect the truth condom line available soon at a store near you!

So, one evening I was hanging on Twitter with hacktivists and freedom fighters from around the world (as one does) when one of them came up with a brilliant plan. Not only will it garner huge media coverage for its salacious possibilities, but it will raise money for WikiLeaks and Assange‘s lawyers at the same time as contributing in a very direct way to making the world a cleaner, more attractive place.

Thanks to @Treisiroon for collating them all, and @SeasangJ, @Pandymonium01 and @AssangeC for playing along. Your cheques are in the mail. As for the rest of you, put your suggestions in the comments section.

And yes, I DO know I’m opening this up for trolls.

Announcing WikiLeaks personal care products!

Contradiction fragrance, a woman’s perogative.

Clean as a Whistleblower soap.

Mendax fragrance, the scent of danger.

Mendax fragrance, nobly untruthful.

Mendax fragrance, From Melbourne to Nairobi, Cambodia to London, The Truth Will Set You Free.

Mendax cologne- because you pwn it.

Mendax cologne… awesome audaciousness.

Mendax cologne, The Scent of Freedom.

Mendax cologne, Get A Whiff of the Truth.

Mendax Gentleman’s overnight bag slash travellers case.

Mendax condom for all night lulz. [hmmm, I foresee difficulty marketing a condom which causes one or one’s partner to collapse in fits of laughter. Or is that just me?] specially treated so no DNA remains ….”Swedish tear test approved DS9001.”

Mendax condoms, because he knows he’ll need it.

Mendax condoms, love the audacity.

Mendax: Dare to Wear it! [unsure whether this refers to condom or cologne, so suggest gift packs containing both, just in time for the holiday season]

Julian, transparent masculinity. [I rather think this is a condom as well. Either that or some kind of macho wrestling body oil]

Redacted deodorant, because not everything should be shared.

Asylum fragrance, too hot to handle.

Silver Fox haircare. [can we get Anderson Cooper as a spokesmodel?]

Oh, the possibilities are endless. Thanks to all who participated in this crowd-sourced effort to diversify WikiLeaks. Remember, united we stand, diversified we profit!

All in a Day’s Work

Welcome to the internet. Everything is fine.

Welcome to the internet. Everything is fine.

You meet the funniest people online. This is one of them.

So, I see this guy on Twitter in conversation (okay, snit-fit) with somebody I recognize from the hacker/Anonymous/WikiLeaks circle, I go check out his bio. Turns out he’s Following me, I’m not Following him. I’m so far behind on my Follow Backs that I have no idea how long that’s been the case. But his bio looks interesting and he does not appear to be deranged, just somewhat beleaguered, at least in his opinion. I see disagreement and cross-examination, and references to several people I’ve researched in my line of work, but I don’t see anything freaky or ostentatiously tinfoil hat, like referencing David Ickes. So I follow.

BAM! Instant DM. And another. And another. And it goes something (exactly) like this. Apologies for formatting errors…it’s difficult copy/pasting DMs into WordPress, alas. And mega-apology for the image at the end of the post, but really, there was only one image that summed this guy up, and that was this particular GIF from Begotten,, which is itself a stronger version of the above GIF. The best description of Begotten I ever heard was, “Makes Eraserhead look like Ernest Saves Christmas.” Enjoy?

ronbrynRon Brynaert@ronbryn

Do you approve of Anon2world’s vile threats and actions? Why do you talk to so many vile trolls?

ronbrynRon Brynaert@ronbryn

He’s spreading lies about me now about how I’m wanted by police.

raincoasterraincoaster@raincoaster

I’m a journalist. I talk to EVERYBODY. It’s my job.

ronbrynRon Brynaert@ronbryn

that’s your response? you didn’t talk to me now did you…the issue isn’t who you talk to..it’s how you talk to them

ronbrynRon Brynaert@ronbryn

No journalist would trade tweets with a scumbag who has swastikas on his avatar.

raincoasterraincoaster@raincoaster

Why are you ragging on me? I’m not taking sides in your conflict with him. It’s not my business.

raincoasterraincoaster@raincoaster

I’m doing an article on UGNazi. How do I do that without researching them?

ronbrynRon Brynaert@ronbryn

You take their side. I see who you joke with…and you ignore the vile things they’ve done, and my reporting on Lamo and Rauhauser.

raincoasterraincoaster@raincoaster

dude, before three weeks ago I’d never HEARD of Rauhauser. And I only followed you today, of course I don’t know your writing abt him.

raincoasterraincoaster@raincoaster

Right now I’m reading your twitter stream specifically to find out what you’ve said about Lamo. Happy? That’s what I was doing when u pinged

ronbrynRon Brynaert@ronbryn

oh, gimme a break, you’re trading tweets with nearly everyone who has been menacing me..and every other tweet they make is about me.

ronbrynRon Brynaert@ronbryn

I’m not happy at all. I see you yukking it up with Anon2world and pretending to be dumb. You obviously approve of this menacing or dont care

At that point I surprised Ron by going rogue: I publicly RT’d some of what he’d been saying to me, with “lol” remarks appended. He appeared taken aback entirely, although this is really a very basic Internet Drama 202 move. If you thought he was a mite touchy before, fasten your seatbelt. This is a guy of whose existence I’d known for something like fifteen minutes, remember. Although he’d been Following me longer, he clearly didn’t know who he was dealing with. Whom. WHATEVER.

ronbrynRon Brynaert@ronbryn

You are a lowlife, aren’t you. Smearing me publicly instead of responding on DM. Well, i’m naming you in my police report for helping them

raincoasterraincoaster@raincoaster

HAHAHAHAHA DO IT!

ronbrynRon Brynaert@ronbryn

menace me. You should be ashamed of yourself. Acting dumb and then helping smear me, which will make it easier for them to dox my family.

Ron Brynaert@ronbryn

You are sick. And out of your mind. And I plan to name you in the police report. You are helping them break multiple laws, scoundrel.

Ron Brynaert@ronbryn

I’m blocking you. And I’m naming you in my police report. What a wretch you are.

And with that he not only Blocked me, but he made his account Private (nope, just looks that way when I’m signed in now, naughty, naughty Twitter!). Too bad for him he forgot to delete his DMs before doing that. What a pro.

the Begotten begets

the Begotten begets

People like that should not breed.

Update the next day:

Well, would you look at that. He HAS been doxed.

We are ANONYMOUS.

We are legion.
We do not forgive.
We do not forget.
Expect us.

If you are going to bully, lie and try to push people around on the internet for the sake of your own lunacy; Anonymous will be at hand to keep the insane at bay. Ronald Brynaert is one of these bullies and relatively unstable psychologically. His attempts to troll Anonymous operatives and occupy protesters has indeed raised an eyebrow or two within various movements. His tactics are habitually always similar; polite and composed one minute and lashing out with complete disregard for factual evidence the next. Mr. Brynaert’s story is a sad one; once a Raw Story reporter – he now faces legal issues related to that company. Brynaert is also a major suspect in a SWATting case, his voice sounds remarkably like the caller who initiated the SWAT. Just googling his name will illustrate the abnormal frequency of his brain’s operation and the drama that surrounds him. His story is surrounded by counter intel claims and various lies… He is dox’d; enjoy. Hey, we tried to be nice… we really really did. *seriously*

Seriously

Social Flow: How to Win with Social Media without Losing Productivity (a new raincoaster media workshop

Social Flow Workshop logo

Social Flow Workshop logo

Social Flow Workshop: How to Win with Social Media Without Losing Productivity

UPDATE: Unfortunately, Mike isn’t well and we’re going to have to postpone our February 4 workshop in Vancouver. We’re going ahead with our February 21st workshop in Victoria, so we hope to see you there. Vancouver workshop will be rescheduled to March.

 

Who: Noted social media trainer Lorraine Murphy and “productivityist” Mike Vardy (editor Lifehack.org)

What: Social Flow: How to Win with Social Media without Losing Productivity

When: 10-4, February 04/2012

Where: ING Web Cafe, 466 Howe Street, Vancouver BC

How: Register here for the Social Flow workshop

It’s a social media struggle!

Wrestling with the idea that you can’t possibly become better at promoting yourself or your business through social media without it harming your productivity?

Well, wrestle no more.

Taking part in Social Flow: How to Win with Social Media without Losing Productivity is your ticket to championship gold in record time!

Social media trainer Lorraine Murphy and “productivityist” Mike Vardy (editor Lifehack.org) will guide you through the ins and outs of managing the social media profiles that keep you both active in your work and telling the public about your work all in one go.

Topics covered include:

  • How to Make Gmail Your Best Friend
  • What Task Manager is Right For You
  • Why Your Email Inbox is Not the Right Task Manager for anyone
  • Improving your Social Flow in Twitter, Facebook, LinkedIn and the new kid on the block, Google+
  • Why Planning your Social Media output is Integral to Your Social Flow
  • How to Avoid Falling Prey to the Perpetual Automation Machine
  • What Calendars are actually For
  • How to Increase Your Social Flow Using Hashtags, Twitter Lists…and more

This hands-on boot camp will not only get you on top of your social media profiles, but it will get you on top of what you need to do make sure they add attention to your business rather than subtract your attention from your business.

Register to attend an upcoming Social Flow workshop

Mike Vardy

Mike Vardy

Mike Vardy is the writer, speaker, and “productivityist” behind Vardy.me and the productivity parody site Eventualism. Vardy’s candid satire has made him a desirable speaker on an often dry topic, delivering talks on the topic such as “Hacking Lifehacks” at TEDx Juan De Fuca. Currently a Managing Editor at Stepcase Lifehack, Vardy has contributed to many popular productivity websites and publications, including David Allen’s GTD Times and Productive Magazine. He lives with his wife, daughter and son in Victoria, BC, Canada.