Dorothy Parker has an heir. Please go to max‘s blog and read her story Table for Two; it is all of the things a Dorothy Parker story is except motivated by hopeless unrequited love for a closeted gay man.
I think.
Also related, this Cowboy Junkies song:
lyrics over the jump. Who’d have guessed I’d be all about the wistfulness tonight (or, indeed, ever). It probably has something to do with the first summer storm and the nostalgic smell of hot asphalt sprinkled with raindrops. Seriously, I must be undercaffeinated or sumpin’. If I go for a jog and encounter raccoon babies I might just start snivelling. Awwww, time to dig out the old Meg Ryan movies.
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The money would be pretty good
If a quart of milk were still a dollar
Or even if a quart of milk were still a quart
And the hours, well, I don’t mind
How they creep on by like an old love of mine
It’s the years that simply disappear that are doing me in
Guess I married too young,
Yeah, nineteen was just too young,
But sometimes you meet someone
And your guts just burn
Its not that I don’t love him anymore
Its just that when I hear him
Coming through that front door
My heart doesnt race like it did once before
But I’ve got a horse out in the country
I get to see him every second Sunday
He comes when I call him,
Yeah, he knows his name
One day I’ll saddle up
And the two of us will ride away
This weather I could almost stand
If the sun would shine a little brighter
Or even if the sun would shine at all
But lately it just seems to me
That this life has lost its mystery
And these cold fall mornings seem to bite
Just a little bit harder
And all my friends have settled down
Become their mothers and their fathers
Without a sound
Except for Cathy,
She bought a one-way subway ticket
And left us all behind
But I’ve got a horse out in the country
I get to see him every second sunday
He comes when I call him,
Yeah, he knows his name
One day I’ll saddle up
And the two of us will ride away
This town wouldnt be so bad
If a girl could trust her instincts
Or even if a girl could trust a boy.
raincoaster 
Wow Rain. Heir O’ Dorothy Parker is even better than “Theftworthy Max.” I feel all loved tonight.
Hey, I don’t drop that one lightly. Wear it with pride.
Absolutely. I love the Parker. And you are a great writer so you saying it means plenty. Thanks you.
Hey, thanks back! High praise from a high level practitioner.
It must be the smell of new rain on hot asphalt. Just don’t go molesting raccoon babies in public!
No. I won’t. I might lol them a little, though.
LOLling – the new exploitative animal abuse! – – –
….. and your Grace should not go molestatng Racoon Babies in private …. !!!!
Don’t worry: everything I do, I do publicly. You should know that by now.
Even LOLSquidding?
You didn’t see us? We came right up to the bathysphere camera!
But did you do the Pride of Erin?
It doesn’t go well with the tentacles. Too much like snakes, you see.
Maybe I should have suggested the Boston Ten Step
All the Americans are on Twelve Steps nowadays. They’ve become so dull.
I wonder if Paris will be doing a twelve step in the Big House?
Are not. I am black out drunk as I type. Grrrr.
Monday morning: GO YOU!
Damn straight. No one should start Monday morning conscious.
Hey, wait for me – it’s only 10pm here. I’ve got a few drinks to go to catch up. (just finished off the mead, now I’ll try a bottle of – – – – Good God, I only have port left!)
max, we are as of one mind. Unfortunately, I’ve only got iced tea. Rats. Archie, maybe we can mix them half and half? Kinda a literati redbull and vodka?
I can live with that. The alcoholic version of Mickey Spillane meeting Virginia Woolf. Lots of potential existential angst there – – – Fill it up, Joe – err – Max – err – coaster
Archie, if you were a man, you would right now go out and buy two bottles of gin and shake down Rain for her mailing address.
Max, where I am all the sources of supply are closed. Unless I go out and steal a good heavy vehicle and do a ram raid through a front door. I’m 8 houris ahead of you
“The sources of supply are closed????” CLOSED? My god, man, where do you live? The Outback???
Around here we just open a junkie’s vein and suck. They never even notice.
No outback at the moment – I am in what passes for civilisation. The outback begins again in nine days.
Bedtime – [snore]
Oh whatever! And you call yourself a drunkard!
“The sources of supply are closed”
That is why God invented bricks and big windows.