For some things, my friends, there are no words. The soulless perversions, both polymorphous and (shockingly) amorphous, of the cosmic aberration which is Cthulhu know bondage neither in space nor in time, nor in any other dimension either dreamed or measured.
Here, my friends, is proof. Cover your eyes and turn away, rather than click on and be damned.
Here be dragons.
Here be Cthulhu Goatse: Continue reading
Another rival to the clown crown falls to “natural causes.” So-called “natural causes.”
Larry Harmon as Bozo the Clown
“I felt if I could plant my size 83AAA shoes on this planet,
(people) would never be able to forget those footprints,” he said.
Yes, one of the most prominent clowns in history, Larry Harmon, has died. Harmon, who played Bozo the Clown for most of the latter part of the Twentieth Century and could plausibly said to have been the first person of any description to clone a clown, is only the most recent in a string of mysterious clown deaths.
Larry Harmon, dead at 83.
Marcel Marceau, dead at 84.
Red Skelton, dead at 84.
Nicolai Poliakoff OBE, dead at 74.
Achille Zavatta, dead at 78.
One by one, the most prominent clowns in the world have been picked off, most succumbing to the blandly ubiquitous “natural causes,” and none living much past their 84th birthday.
The world shrugs, sighs, says “these things happen,” ah yes, but why do they always seem to happen to the rivals of one man? One man who is known to associate with hardened criminals. One man who has at his fingertips the very substances of which a heart attack is made?
One man, ladies and gentlemen. One man named Ronald McDonald.
For Devo:
For the record and just to warn the universe on general principles, it is now eight minutes after midnight on July 4th and the moronic bumblers working on the garage gates of our apartment building are STILL AT IT WITH THE FUCKING POWER TOOLS, sixteen hours after they started and six hours after the bylaws say they have to stop. I tried calling the noise bylaw hotline: it’s open from 9am-4pm, Monday to Friday, and there is NO VOICE MAIL.
If they really want to see a power tool up close and personal, just let them keep this up till my bedtime.
Thus: the Devo. I am self-medicating with New Wave.
Although in Operation Global Media Domination news, I note with great pleasure that my post on Ashley Kaufman at Lolebrity is on the front page of Google. The post on Gawker got kilt; wonder why? Ah, well, less competition!
I only took one day off, but I’m already three days behind, somehow. Moar blawg postz soon, I promise. Like, real ones.
raincoaster 