Forgive me if I’m a little late on these no-longer-breaking Giant Squid stories; all you Giant Squidfans out there, sorry!

There’s some fun stuff on the BBC website, including this, a story about a newly-discovered shark species that literally eats Giant Squid for breakfast. We are, therefore, acknowledging its kickassiness by capitalizing, in all future blog posts, the species name “Sleeper Shark.” You just never know when one of them might take offense, so better safe than sorry, eh? And you should see what it eats for dinner!

Awww, ain’t he purty? And dainty-looking, too. Here’s a snippet from the article:

When French marine biologists opened the stomachs of 36 sleeper sharks accidentally killed by trawlers, they collected the remains of at least 49 colossal squid and eight giant squid.

But wait! you say. I heard you there, don’t try to pretend otherwise! What, you say, is a colossal squid? Er, scuse me, Colossal Squid?

Why, I’m glad you asked.

This, ladies and gentlemen and invertebrates, is a Colossal Squid. And here is the article about it. It reads, in part:

“Giant squid is no longer the largest squid that’s out there. We’ve got something that’s even larger, and not just larger but an order of magnitude meaner.”

This squid has one of the largest beaks known of any squid and also has unique swivelling hooks on the clubs at the ends of its tentacles.

“When this animal was alive, it really has to be one of the most frightening predators out there. It’s without parallel in the oceans,” said Dr O’Shea, whose work is sponsored by Discovery Channel.

The best part? The fact that Dr O’Shea classifies this specimen, with a mantle length of 2.5 m, as “juvenile.” That’s up there with “cloning” for coolitude.