Poor baby. His penile implant worked like a dream, and waggled happily skyward without pause from the moment of activation. For ten years. So, what did Mister Genius here do? Get himself a bevy of ladyfriends and a bad reputation?

No, he became a hermit instead. One has to wonder what he wanted it for in the first place. If it’s that bulgy, you can always stuff your pants with a pillow and just pretend to be fat. Or, hey! tell everyone your name is “Colin Farrell.”

From News of the Weird:

The Rhode Island Supreme Court in June affirmed a $400,000 judgment for Charles Lennon, 68, who had sued the now-bankrupt Dacomed company after his Dura-II penile implant remained constantly erect for 10 years. Lennon said embarrassment had forced him to become a recluse.