What yesterday taught me:
- After ten at night, downtown in the boondocks is filled with attractive, well-dressed young couples strolling and chatting to one another and greeting friends.
- After ten at night, downtown in Vancouver is filled with staggering drunks, beggars, dopey hipsters wearing secondhand clothing they haven’t even brushed the dead owner’s dandruff off, and those so outrageously obnoxious that their own mothers out in said boondocks threw them out of their basement apartments and told them to go “get some fresh air.” This is much like the tourist effect, to whit: the reason most tourists are so obnoxious is that they are not traveling because they wish to, but rather because they have been thrown out by their homes.
- When I have that nagging feeling that I’m forgetting something in my apartment, that thing invariably turns out to be the keys to the place where I’m headed.
- When I forget the keys to the boondock-ridden locale where I am supposed to be house-sitting, it will be on a night when I decide to take the Skytrain to the very farthest station in said boondock and walk to the house via the “scenic route” which, of course, takes place in the foothills of the Coastal Mountain range.
- I must be getting fitter because, although the walk wiped me out, I no longer smell like wet pennies when I sweat, so this is an improvement.
- Conrad Black has two sons, in addition to the daughter who’s been doing the “faithful supporter” thing at the trial. Funny, I read his whole autobiography and he didn’t mention them. Nor getting married, if memory serves. What a family guy!
- Those graveyards that have the small, flat stones set flush into the ground? When you pass them at speed on the Skytrain on a dark and stormy night, they sparkle. Almost worth forgoing the weeping angels. Somewhere in Boondock, Ontario, my mother is sparkling. Unless it snowed; then she’s twinkling.
- It is indeed possible to live off nothing but meat, cheese, caffeine and scotch for a week, but when you do
- you will crave, I mean actively crave, multivitamins.
That concludes tonight’s lesson.
raincoaster 
and out here, in Boondock, BC, my dad is sparkling too…under the snow.
So, did you take the skytrain back to get the keys?
see ya in a few.
Yes, I did. AND back again that night. Bloody hell, I need a frickin’ bus pass!
My grandparents sparkle near 41st street – or is it 49th?
You forgot to mention the meth casualties downtown. A searing memory from my last trip to Canada.
Dude, where I live that goes without saying. At least when it’s dark they’re not as obvious.
Strangely, the only damage sustained by the place in the boonies was the result of an attack by a meth-crazed tweaker. It’s everywhere.
And it’s 41st and Fraser, I believe. Gorgeous spot. I saw a man jogging around the cemetery once, and thought that really ironic.
Ah yes, I remember now.
I strongly recommend cranberry juice. It’s full of Vitamin C and hopefully it will help cut the craving.
Well, as it happens I took the multivitamin and my system was all, like, sigh. But I’ve been sucking back the juices of all kinds, particularly lime, as well.
meat, cheese, scotch, and caffeine, eh? I’m no expert but I suspect that might be the culprit in the penny-smell case. : )
Not at all; I’d been living quite clean. I only started on the protein-fat-booze-caffeine diet when I started house-sitting last week. Prior to that my roomie was a vegan raw food chef.
It’s just like turning the furnace on for the first time in the winter; you get that burnt smell. I turned my internal furnace on for awhile and that’s when I get the penny smell. Obviously, I’m fitter than I used to be, because it didn’t happen this time.
I know….just having some fun with you because that penny comment had me literrally falling out of the chair laughing. I’ve got quite an acute sense of smell and usually pick upon the many peculiarities of people’s smells.
That diet sounds slightly Atkins-esque, which I have both prasie and horror stories for. Praiseworthy being that I’ve lost 40 and 50 pounds respectively within months of trying it. Horrific in that I managed to give myself kidney stones and diverticulitis while doing it (and I’m only 29)!!!!
Lately I’ve been back on the Yeungling Lager, cheesesteak, and cigarette diet. I’ll probably go protein/veggie crazy again over the holiday break here. 2 more days of work and then I’m off until 2008!!!!!
Ah well that’s where you’re going wrong, you’re eating a varied diet, you can live on bacon sandwhiches and cheap white wine and NEVER crave vitamins. You end up too ill to stomach vitamins and your hair falls out and eventually you die.
Actually I must pop out and buy some fruit tommorow!
RIP Mac, I think he might sparkle too x
Yes, he was one of the rare ones that did it while he was living, too.