Letter to the Editor O’ the Day: The American Association of Stupid People

Idiocy springs eternal

From the illustrious Dr Boli (links added, for extra enjoyment):

Sir:

Now that racism is dead and the darkies have everything they want, is it not high time to end the senseless discrimination against stupid people? Statistics say that 50% of the population is of below-average intelligence, but I believe the true figure is much larger. I myself have been proudly stupid for my entire adult life. I was a stupid child as well, and I came from a long line of stupid ancestors. Indeed, family tradition says that our ancestry goes back further than any other family’s, and I firmly believe every unexamined tradition I hear. The secret of my success has been, in one word, credulity. If I could remember what this letter was about, I should have ended it with a zinger that would make my opponents feel awfully silly.

Sincerely,
Carton Gherkin IV
President, American Association of Stupid People (AAPS)

19 thoughts on “Letter to the Editor O’ the Day: The American Association of Stupid People

  1. I was going to say I thought discrimination against stupid people ended when the stupid people (s)elected the stupid president. Twice. Now I think we need to end the discrimination against intelligent people who know what they’re talking about.

  2. I really think the American people have been so fucked over by the outgoing regime that government by chicken bingo would be an improvement. You know how chicken bingo is played, right?

    If nothing else, Obama has given people hope in their own country and some slight measure of faith in their public servants which has been missing since…well, Nixon. You don’t think having hope for America is a good thing?

  3. No, Bunk thinks we are going to hell for handing the country over to the socialists. He may be right, but I’m willing to take a swing to the other side for once. I’ve watched the little guy get trounced since Reagan, and I’m tired of it.

  4. silverstar–

    I’m going to be polite. You can’t possibly know what I think and I’m not about to let an ignoramus put words in my mouth. What “little guy” are you talking about? Your boyfriend?

    No, sliverstar, I don’t think we are going to hell.

    I think that there are too many people in this country that truly believe that they deserve something, when in fact, they have not earned it.

    You don’t have a clue, do you?

  5. Oh Bunk, I listened to your National Anthem again yesterday. In eight years your hero and his puppeteers turned your country from “The Land of the free and the home of the brave” into the “Land of the obedient and the home of the scared.”

    Of course Obama will have to raise taxes. All the money was spent, firstly on an unwinnable military escapade and secondly on socialism for the obscenely rich! Of course, if you firmly believe in not paying your debts, then you have a right to grumble. Just don’t expect me, or my country, to loan you any more!

    As for the ignobus, I also try not to insult so I won’t say “blinkered” or “selfishly self-centred” or “ostrich” because I still believe you are better than that.

  6. wow, i just came by to visit, and theres a brawl in the comments.
    I did not vote for Obama but he is now my president. Jesus is my Lord. My mom’s health and well being is still my highest priority, and I am assuredly going to heaven, where we will be free from politics, Chicago style or any other.

  7. Thanks, Archie, you are right on. Speaking of people who want something they don’t deserve, I notice a lot of people of the red persuasion want roads, bridges, etc. etc., but don’t want to pay the taxes it takes to build and maintain them.
    Bunk- you also don’t know anything about my life. My boyfriend is a little guy. He’s 5’3″. He’s still taller than me, and IMHO, he’s a better man than you. Even though he is homeless, and hasn’t been paid for his work for over a month, he is keeping on. You’d probably look down on him because he applied for food stamps the other day. It was that or starve. I’m sure he hasn’t been paid because the guy he’s working for got hit by the credit crunch. And that’s what I mean by the little guy getting screwed.IMHO, the people who are getting something they haven’t earned are CEOs who ran their companies into the ground, asked for bailouts, and then took bonuses of millions of dollars. And the banks still aren’t lending, despite the bailouts, and so my boyfriend hasn’t been paid.
    But as you’ve said, I don’t know you.

  8. Folks, sorry if I ruffled your feathers. In retrospect, I might have tamed it down a tad before I clicked “Post Comment.”

    Silver–
    I do have compassion, and I’m sorry to hear about your boyfriend’s situation. I have no control over anyone’s life choices, except for my own. If he hasn’t been paid, there are simple legal remedies, filing a mechanic’s lien, for example. If a company goes into bankruptcy or other arrears, the employees get paid first.

    The CEOs who ran their companies into the ground most likely didn’t do it intentionally. Why would you sink your own ship? I suspect they did it out of incompetance. On the other hand, businesses are created for the purpose making wealth for the Owners. If paying employees helps to achieve that purpose, the Owner will hire them. If an Owner decides to close down his business for whatever reason, he has that right.

    I think the bailouts and the proposed “stimulus package” are abhorrent ideas promoted by those in power who don’t understand basic economics and the power of the market.

    I believe that Obama’s proposed solution of creating government-sponsored infrastructure projects to create jobs is flawed. Anything government-sponsored is not paid for by the government; it is paid for by taxpayers and our confiscated earnings. There is also not enough experienced construction labor to perform the work that he proposes, and not everyone out of work has experience in that field.

    Archie– I’m not an idealist. Give me one instance where any government, anywhere, throughout history, was able to tax itself into prosperity. You needn’t waste your time with research because the answer is NONE. Reagan understood that. Even JFK understood that. Both CUT taxes to restore the economy in down times, and in both cases it worked.

    As for our present depressed economy, Obama is not your saviour, because local and worldwide market forces are more powerful than he is. The less he and congress does, the better.

    Sorry for being overly verbose.
    Vive le Resistance

  9. Senor Bunk ” … Give me one instance where any government, anywhere, throughout history, was able to tax itself into prosperity …”

    Anonymous Caledonian Chieftain “… these Romans make a desolation ………. and they call it “Peace” [Tacitus recording Speeches before the Battle of Mons Graupius]

    Your Grace

    Mdm S-Press’s Young Man is going through the difficult times that without any fault of their own so many Folk are going through on both sides of the Pond …. We hope that she will soon be able to report that her Young Man is able to enjoy happier economic times

    Meanwhile, Harrumpus, Harrumpha, Harrumphum

    Like so many US Residents, the sagacious RaCoon may struggle with the spelling of his Species, but he powerfully makes a powerful point which we have indeed preferred to ignore at our Peril …. and I rather suspect that this sensitive RaCoon is not without a personal understanding of difficult economic circumstances

    I suppose you Trans=Pondian North-Americans have no memories of the Empire ….. err …. the Roman Empire

    but in the year Dot Julius Caesar and his Patriotic Romans did indeed follow a Policy of “Taxing into Prosperity”

    ….. “Looting” might have been the expression of choice for Gauls and Greeks at the receiving end

    Italy had a period of great prosperity, but it was on the back of taxing “the Colonies” to the point where their Economies reached the point of widespread misery and economic collapse

    Here in the Cis-Pondian UK, State Benefits are increasingly unaffordable – this has been masked because Her Britannic Majesty’s Government has “Paid for Them” by borrowing from Foreigners …. and by selling everything it can sell (eg the UK’s Electricity, Water, Automobile, Steel Industries are largely foreign owned)

    AND

    we have a punitive taxation system that is greedily and unpleasantly destroying Businesses and Jobs in order to finance State Expenditure that is so often lavish, frivolous and wasteful

    … but of course, our US friends are familiar with the unPLeasantness of the Internal Revenue Service in the Land of “the Free”

    Your Grace’s obedient servant etc

    G E

  10. Bunk’s right, there aren’t that many skilled construction workers out there, but I can tell you for sure that a lot of them that are, are out of work at the moment. People aren’t going into the trades because it’s feast or famine. Right now it’s famine. The money and benefits of union work are good, when they are working. And then there are the give-backs that business has gotten lately.
    We need to build this stuff. IMHO, it needs to be built at government expense, because dammit, we own it. One advantage of the trades is the apprenticeship programs. You don’t have to go to school for a long time before you get out on the job. You learn on the job. Usually apprentices are on the job after a couple of months of school. The ratio on construction sites is usually one journeyman to two apprentices. This country would benefit from a lot more people getting their hands dirty, and a lot less “money managers.”

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