Ladies and gentlemen, I have found it!

I feel like the Indiana Jones of the Internet. I, raincoaster, have at last, after a search of weeks, found the one true inet-cryptogasm. In defiance of my firm belief that there is nothing, no matter how awful, that does not have a fansite…

Jocelyne Wildenstein has no fansite.

Imagine that! At least she's prettier than the Segway, and probably marginally more biodegradeable, too.

Oh, cautionary mentions abound, but where is the luv for this obviously (expensively) broken and reassembled woman?

It is a woman, right?

This is the closest thing to a fansite I could find on all the mighty internet:

http://www.celebritybattles.com/celeb/Jocelyn+Wildenstein

and it says:

Jocelyn Wildenstein does not currently have any other celebrity or celebrity pictures sites listed. Jocelyn Wildenstein does not currently have any other pictures.

and, most crushingly:

Battles in Which Jocelyne Wildenstein Competes:

Question: Which girl is hotter?

Ranking: 8395/8530

Me-yow!