A little background, for those of us who somehow missed the Eurovision Song Contest. I suppose I could turn to music journalists at this time, but that's just not me. What is? Turning, of course, to those shrivelled little hearts of tar, fashion journalists the Fuggers:
Lordi dresses itself — primarily with the aid of reindeer fur — as different monsters from different eras. Although presumably even the undead have an enduring sense of patriotic pride, as evidenced by the zombie whose face is rotting off, yet whose head is adorned with a kicky little Finland top hat, as if he is threatening here to break into a series of cabaret-style high kicks before he flosses his teeth with your intestines. And Mummy Of The Bride over there just seems so endearingly thrilled to be clutching that bouquet of spring life in his decaying arms. Fantastic.
Crushingly, iTunes hasn't figured out how to let me buy things in Euros (please, iTunes, get on that immediately), or else I'd be all over Lordi's album — titled, of course, The Arockalypse, and filled with kicky death metal songs entitled "The Night Of The Loving Dead," "Chainsaw Buffet," "Bringing Back The Balls To Rock," "It Snows In Hell," and of course the Eurovision-winning tune, "Hard Rock Hallelujah." And Finland is going insane for these guys — four different versions of "Hard Rock Hallelujah" are in the Finnish iTunes Top 10 Songs list.
I absolutely cherish the idea that the Finnish people want the world to see five huge guys dressed up as punk Skeletors and think, "Oh, man, that is so Finland." I secretly — okay, not so secretly — love Lordi deeply even though they look completely insane.
Sploid is reporting widespread outrage at two Finnish tabloids, who have outed the Orc-tastic lead singer's undisguised visage. Apparently, he, like all white thirtysomething men, bears a slight resemblance to Kevin Smith.
"It's so wrong," said 15-year-old Milla Luoto. "Lordi didn't want his face shown and they just did it anyway. I am really angry."
The actual face of Lordi after the jump.