Half-baked, anyway. I suggest a scientific name Carlin Cheechinigus, but that’s subject to (dis-) approval.
This hallucinogenic beauty was caught off the coast of Maine, so the possibility exists that he was just on his way back from a wild party on the Gaspe, which would explain why he still looks half-baked.
Although it no doubt has an ironclad alibi. It’s underage, too, as are some of its most vociferous fans. Here is the report from the Bangor newspaper:
“Dude, it’s half orange and half, like, regular color for a lobster,” exclaimed Alyssa Bonin, 12, of Webster, Mass.
Sharp eyes there, Alyssa. Maybe a little bloodshot from the sounds of things, but still, sharp.
Mills intends to keep the two-toned lobster over the winter and have him on display for educational purposes, though he has no plans to name him.
“Lobsters are interesting but not personable,” he said.
We at the raincoaster blog beg, of course, to differ. Even our on the one hand shall not know what our on the other hand is doing
The rare 1-pound crustacean, caught earlier this week in Steuben, is a genetic mutation with a two-toned shell.
One side is the usual mottled dark green. The other side is the orange-red shade of a lobster that’s already spent some time in the hot pot.
The odds of this kind of mutation occurring are very rare – something like one in 50 million to 100 million, according to oceanarium staff. The chance of finding a blue lobster is far more common, at one in a million.
“Isn’t he pretty?” Bette Spurling of Southwest Harbor cooed Thursday as she stroked the lobster’s shell to calm him down.
Now that is the proper way to treat an addled celebrity. Not at all the way Jon Stewart did with the poor, hapless and handsome Butterscotch Stallion here (heartlessly stolen from Defamer):
raincoaster 
Dude! That’s nuthin’ man. You should see this one, this one time I saw like, like this humungous lobster, dude. And it was like black and blue. And hey–it was bi!
It invited me over to its tank, man. But I was like “Cool, but I totally gotta score”. Then I had the munchies on my way to Devan’s house–’cause dude’s always holdin’, y’know? Anyway, so I …
Sorry–what was I saying?
Oh, fine. I spend a week up there eating nothing but crusts of bread and drinking nothing but beer and wine, and the minute I’m home you break out the herbals.
I thought that “Lemon balm mint” looked a little funny.
I wonder if the people will name the poor thing or not :P
I don’t doubt it: every animal that goes on display eventually gets a cutesy moniker that it has to hide from the others. “Shamu” being just one example. Shamu probably instructs people to call him “Rocky” or something.
…..For some reason I feel the need to go melt some butter….
“Lefty”! The world need more people called Lefty! And crustaceans!
Besides, what could be more appropriate?
Well I suppose “Red” has something in it’s favour.
“Two-Face” has already been taken, alas.
I wonder if the other lobsters think he’s pretty or ugly. They should set him up with Metro’s hermaphrodite pinto Maritime lobster. They could make little bi-confused babies.
This is going to be like The Ugly Duckling, except with lobsters in it :P Poor, poor sod.
Well if he heads off into the sunset with Metro’s Maritime lobster, also bi-coloured and bi-sexual to boot, maybe they’ll have little checkerboard babies.