I was trying to class up the blog for the newbies, but let’s face it: I just have a dirty mind.

That’s why I’m posting about the Phallic Logo Awards, from B3TA, whatever that means. No, I KNOW what “phallic” means; it’s the TLA with a silent 3 I don’t understand. But then, it’s the Internet; you’re not supposed to understand it!

The game designers across the nation are playing is; can they design a logo and get it approved without the client realising it’s a big spurting penis?

We asked our readers to send in the best cock logos from around the world for our team of experts to evaluate. Now we present to you the very cream of the cocks.

Who: Czech sausage company
Pros: Great 1920s transvestite oral sex action.
Cons: Two meat. No veg.
Cock mark: 46%…

And so on…do not omit scrolling right to the bottom, for the Exxtra Bonus Muff Diver Award.

Who: Pride in Oldham award scheme
Pros: Tiny, tiny dwarf man going down on a lady in a peephole bikini.
Cons: He’s starting with her bellybutton.

No, seriously, you gotta see this!