Audrey Hepburn and her pet deerDon’t you just hate it when you’re minding your own business, just taking your deer out for a walk, and suddenly one little thing sets off the mob and things go all Quentin Tarantino on you? Someone call a recently-reemployed screenwriter and get them on this right away: it’s a soon-to-be-classic, can’t-fail romcom featuring Hayden Panettiere as the ditsy socialite India Vanderhoof and Michael Cera as Fred Fogg, the waiter with a heart of gold, starring in the guaranteed worldwide box office smash Bringing Up Bambi!

All the way from Winston-Salem, North Carolina:

Witnesses eating lunch Sunday at TJ’s Deli in Winston-Salem were startled when they said a woman walking a pet deer on a leash lost control of the animal, causing it to break through a window and run amok through the restaurant’s dining room…

The deer, which witnesses described as a 120 to 140-pound doe, finally ran through the kitchen and out the back door.

No one was injured in the melee, and there’s no word on why the woman had the deer or if charges would be filed against her.”We might add deer jerky (to the menu),” Fogg said laughing

Who should I call about this…Pixar? Steve, Steve, we need to talk.

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12 thoughts on “D’oe!

  1. Mixing Hollywood and deer (“you said ‘deer’, right?”)…Instant Bambi trauma! Then again I didn’t grow up in BC — you guys have deer all over the place (Well, not in downtown Vancouver…But even then…).

  2. Yes, we’ve had deer in downtown Vancouver, and a cougar or two as well. There’s a family of bears on Burnaby Mountain, where the Simon Fraser University campus is, and last year a junior soccer game had to be called off when a bald eagle fledgling plopped down on the field and didn’t know how to get back in the air. I met a woman who’s husband is an Urban Wildlife officer and talk about a fascinating job!

  3. Pingback: Pages tagged "lush"

  4. Sadly the cougar population in the downtown area has dwindled of late. Scientists speculate that competition for the beats’ natural prey has grown too fierce, and most have moved on.

    Raincoaster is practically the only specimen left nowadays.

  5. Obviously I meant “beasts'” rather than “beats.”

    “Beats” emerged from the middle class, were interested in jazz culture, and had poetic tastes. I would never imply that Raincoaster had class, culture, or taste.

    I regret the error.

  6. The Beats’ natural prey are the white, middle-class people who lead what they themselves would term “Normal Lives.” Lucky for you the Beats are extinct, eh?

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