Category Archives: diary

your thirty second raincoaster update

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Here’s the update on the fight situation:

  • No charges laid
  • perp kept in handcuffs on the corner of the busiest street in Canada for an hour
  • perp peed herself in front of a thousand people because of above
  • perp got the shit kicked out of her and was thrown/punched/kicked into traffic repeatedly by the victim
  • victim reports the following aftereffects:
    • a small bruise on the end of my left eyebrow
    • a small scab on my right ear
    • two bruises on my right arm from where she grabbed me
    • a BIG bruise on my left leg where I went to roundhouse kick her and the damn building got in the way
    • all my knuckles were bruised, from punching her. I can only IMAGINE what her face looked like all last week…it must have been quite a sight, if my knuckles were that bruised.

    Conclusion: Well worth it.

the (second) fight of my life

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Zombie Yoga

In retrospect I must say that I really couldn’t have picked a better fashion choice than Farmer Zombie for the street fight.

A little background, perhaps?

I live on the Downtown EastSide, an area where the average life expectancy has been estimated as low as 33 years, thanks to AIDS, Hep-A, Hep-B, Hep-C, tuburculosis, and a whole epidemiology text of diseases that were thought to belong to Victorian novels about impoverished chambermaids, not to mention the street fighting.

A 76-year-old man died last year when he was stabbed in an argument about a spot in line at the Food Bank a block from my house.

People on the things people are on down here are touchy.

But they are, as a rule, paranoid about people who look respectable. They know damn well you’ll call the cops on them and the cops will pay attention to you, so the violence is pretty much street-on-street, not street-on-norm, if you know what I mean, and if you don’t, perhaps I’ve lived down here too long.

But I was on the West Side. That’s the thing: the West Side is where we keep the Yuppies, the Preppies, and the Really Rich People From Hong Kong.

I’m never going west of Carrall Street again!

So, there I was on the West Side, minding, very much, my own business, as one does when one has a lot to think about at ten o’clock at night, Continue reading →

i has a muneez

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i has a mueez

Hey, this “working for a living” thang has an upside!

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some days you’re the eagle; some days you’re the deer

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I’ve been about ready to go all golden eagle on somebody for a couple of days now.

 

  • My phone died.
  • My Gmail is frozen. I cannot send from my account.
  • I have 500 invitations and 1000 press releases to send out…today. And see above.
  • My blogging course announcement went out and I’ve got phone messages and emails from people who’d like to register. And see above.
  • I can’t write the press release until an author gets back to me with her bio, for which I’ve been waiting three weeks. At this point I’d be tempted to make shit up (she was raised by jackals on the African veldt…studied alchemy under Paracelsus at Tokyo Polytechnic) if indeed there existed the possibility I could send the emails in the first place, which there is not. See above.

 

On the bright side:

  • a friend promised not to commit suicide for at least two weeks, and
  • my father’s apparently haunting the CFB Borden Flying Club, so at least he’s having fun.