Speaking of things that will end badly, how about this one: this poor 20 year old soldier gets killed in action, and his morbidly monomaniacal parental units have the cold, dead corpse’s shrivelled scrota pumped for sperm, which the hospital then holds for whatever nefarious purposes hospitals need dead boys’s sperm for, but the parents sue, claiming (not without some justification there, it must be said) that those are their genes, not the hospital’s, which suit they win, and, upon gaining custody of the precious vials of spooge they then proceed to advertise them internationally in, I suppose, the personals section of Goth magazines and such, looking for a zombie-positive woman with, presumably, no real-life prospects, and who wishes to give birth to the child there is no evidence this poor kid ever wanted.

Lesson: wank before war, boys! If whatever creepy Doctor Phibes impersonator the parents hired had not found any sperm, all would have been well. You know this is gonna be one hell of a Jerry Springer show!

From the BBC. I have no idea how I got there, and if I did post the intermediary websites, no doubt they’d all deny it!

The lawyer of an Israeli couple who won the right to use their dead son’s sperm to inseminate a woman he never met says the case is a boost for family rights.

Irit Rosenblum told the BBC the landmark ruling meant family lines could continue even without the written consent of the male prior to death.

The dead man, soldier Keivin Cohen, was killed in the Gaza Strip in 2002.

You may now commence retelling your J-Date horror stories, but no way will they top this. This one’s got a lock on the Controlling Mother of the Year Award.