Justin Trudeau "Because it's 2015."

Covid Briefing Bingo, Continued…

Justin Trudeau "Because it's 2015."

Justin Trudeau “Because it’s 2015.”

 

But for how long? Who among us can say (not even the esteemed Dr. Theresa Tam knows, nor the revered Dr. Bonnie Henry. Surely not your humble blog host). Now that the daily briefing has become the Once In Awhile briefing, there seems to be less and less point to creating new bingo cards; on the other hand, there is more and more boredom.

So, here we are.

Almost two months ago we launched the Canuckian version of Briefing Bingo, alongside pre-existing British and American games, taking our rightful place on the world stage. We dunno what’s up with the other two countries in Five Eyes, but maybe their retired journalists have better things to do with their time?

God knows I don’t.

Almost a month after the media frenzy (not really, although the NaPo did give me a very polite rejection email) of our initial launch, we followed up with the Second Generation Briefing Bingo card, featuring the square that would be near and dear to my departed mother’s heart, had she not departed this Earth back when Prime Minister Zoolander was still at school. I refer, of course, to the “Wears brown shoes with blue or grey suit WHICH IS JUST MORALLY WRONG” square.

To date we have filled exactly ONE row, the second row from the top in the first generation card. But do play our Daily-Briefing-Bingo-3rd Generation, either with or without previous editions, because if we can just coax him into saying the words “Attack and dethrone god” on-camera, it will all have been worth it.

Tune in now and then at roughly 10ish-11ish some mornings, follow along live on Twitter with the hashtag #BriefingBingo, or just check this site once a day for the roundup of each day’s bingo calls in the comments section. And if we miss something, an accidental photobomb, an insect, or a muttered “attack and dethrone god”, by all means hit us up in the comments; thanks to CPAC, we can always review and amend.

Daily Briefing Bingo Edition 2.0

PM Zoolander rides a moose. As one does.

PM Zoolander rides a moose as one does.

If you’re new to Daily Briefing Bingo, check out Daily Briefing Bingo Edition 1.0 and get your first-edition Daily Briefing Bingo card. From this point onward, you can play either or both cards from this point onward.

The first edition card does not have any completed lines yet, but here’s hoping! Come on, Ascot! Come on, Jeans! Come on, Blue Steel! Sadly, second column is a complete skunk, with not a single box ticked at this point. Ou est le blue plaid jacket d’antan?

Here’s the Daily Briefing Bingo Card Edition 2.0. It’s a PDF, so if you’ve got the right software you download and play with it on the computer, or you can print it out and mark it up in meatspace, rollin’ old skool.

Moving forward, from this point on, our new reality is (sorrynotsorry) squares featuring appearances by a diverse cast of characters and phrases including international vaccine alliance GAVI, visible perspiration, porchscaping, “Ramping up”, “The new normal”, “Who we are”, and the highly controversial Wears brown shoes with a grey or blue suit, which is JUST MORALLY WRONG.

Remember to play safe, and maintain good social distancing and mask hygiene while playing, and to never, and I mean never, speak moistly.

 

 

Daily Briefing Bingo: The Canadian Content You Didn’t Know You Needed

Hey Girl from Whaaat Studio?

Hey Girl, do you want a robust social safety net? I got you.

But you totally DO need it, you know?

Ladies and gentlemen, the greatest challenge faced by contemporary news organizations (besides rapacious owners; don’t get me started) is that of enticing readers, listeners, watchers, away from the never-ending stream of infotainment which surrounds us. Never mind getting them to actually pay attention to the news.

Ladies and gentlemen, we have, at long last and at uncounted expense, solved that problem. I mean, it didn’t cost me anything, but I also didn’t count it, so … that.

The solution? We can finally reveal it:

Bingo cards.

 

 

 

 

Oh, come on. You’ve been on Twitter. You know how this works. You know this works. You’ve played this, don’t pretend that you haven’t. We’ve taken the old jokey cultural trope bingo game and updated it, giving an entire nation a reason (finally!) to skip out on this “work from home” nonsense (these crazy kids and their crazy ideas to integrate work and life in a holistic, effortless, and sustainable way, pssssshhhhhhh, whatever) and tune in to the daily briefing on the Covid-19 crisis from Prime Minister Zoolander Trudeau.

And yes, we know contemporary audiences have short attention spans, so we’ve built a few tricks into this most competitive of game boards. In order to complete your board, you’ll have to watch on multiple days. Yes, we are just that hardass around these parts.

Enough prelude, on to the downloadable game board. Yes, there can be only one.

You can print it out or just edit the PDF as you go along, and play along live on Twitter (follow @raincoaster, who will be calling out the squares live unless she {I} sleep[s] in again) and the Canadian tv network of your choice or YouTube at 11am EST each weekday.

Canadian Sniper: watch the trailer

Canadian Sniper, currently breaking box office records from Saint-Louis-du-Ha! Ha! to Head-Smashed-In Buffalo Jump, is a poignant lumbersexual domestic drama illustrating the post traumatic stress of a, yes, Canadian Sniper, isolated and alone in an environment deprived even of a backyard rink.

Enjoy?

Spreaker of the House: introducing The Cryptosphere on AnonUKRadio

The Cryptosphere

The Cryptosphere

I’m a bit behind on my publicity stunting for my new news site TheCryptosphere, but here’s some! I know!!! Aren’t you excited?

Last week, which is to say July 6, 2014, I appeared as a guest on Topman‘s AnonUK radio show, which (particularly since Lorax got v&) is one of the most popular Anonymous podcasts in the world. Here’s their YouTube introduction to the concept of Anonymous itself:

And here is the podcast, featuring moi, Sue Crabtree of FreeAnonsd00minator, and more:

[audio http://api.spreaker.com/download/episode/4700019.mp3]