Conan O’Brian does the Monster Mash

Stolen from Gawker. Why is it that none of the tall, handsome white boys can dance?

when pandas attack

when pandas attack...Toronto!

Well in all honesty, if a panda went on a rampage and destroyed downtown Toronto with its laser-beam eyes, all we in the West would say is “Cool! Is it up on YouTube yet?”

As it is, all we have to report is that a panda has eaten a small piece of an American. To which we say, “Cool! Is it up on YouTube yet?”

A panda cub bit off part of the thumb of an American visitor who was feeding the animal at a reserve in southwest China, state media reported Thursday.

The 50-year-old woman, identified only as Lisa, panda attackhad registered in the Wolong Giant Panda Protection and Research Center in Sichuan province as a volunteer, according to the official Xinhua News Agency

Last month, a drunken Chinese tourist bit a panda at the Beijing Zoo after the animal attacked him when he jumped into the enclosure and tried to hug it.

That’ll teach those damn huggers a lesson!

when scrapbookers attack

Martha in court

It appears that some American crafters have turned to the dark side, using their glue guns for nefarious purposes. Whodathunkit?

Officers said the girls threatened a 78-year-old Parma Heights woman with a glue gun, knocked her down and stole her car from the Day Drive store, NewsChannel5 reported.