Monthly Archives: August 2014

Bucket List

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I have, for some time, suspected that my bucket list might differ substantially from those of other, lesser mortals. A swift peruse through the Bucket List tag on WordPress confirms this. 

AIM HIGHER PEOPLE!

I have no idea whether or not you have the capability to achieve higher aims, but just reading “go to Six Flags” umpteen times is fucking depressing, okay? AIM HIGHER. For me.

And now to my bucket list:

  1. Marry Prince Caspian
  2. Win Nobel Prize for Literature before 30 (nb requires time machine at this point)
  3. Capture and tame and break to ride a wild mustang, dressage optional
  4. Become the White Rahnee of Sarawak
  5. Have John Galliano call me a muse
  6. Make memorable entrance to Annabel’s
  7. Compete in a three day event
  8. See Bali from the inside, the way I saw the Bandas
  9. Have a good sit-down with Prince Bandar of Saudi Arabia
  10. At least once pre-empt Biella Coleman when the media asks for comment on Anonymous. Just once, come on girl
  11. Viggo.
  12. EDITED TO ADD: Wikipedia entry. How could I have forgotten?

I’m Not Sure There’s a Workable Path for Professional Online Writers

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I don’t think it’s as bleak as this article makes it seem, but yes, I’ve worked for $15 an article and had editors complain that I got paid that much. Which is one reason I work for myself now.

Freddie deBoer's avatarThe Dish

by Freddie deBoer

So it won’t surprise anybody to learn that I really, really don’t like Buzzfeed.

Sometimes, when I consider the Buzzfeed phenomenon, I think I’m living in some sort of fictional satirical world where Buzzfeed is a symbol of how far media can fall. It’s like living in a Douglas Copeland novel. Buzzfeed’s particular brand of lowest common denominator clickbait, their “14 Giraffes Who Totally Look  Like Steve Buscemi,” their “25 Things Only People from [Insert Geographical Area Here] Understand,” their “Which of Fat Cat’s Minions from Chip’n’Dale’s Rescue Rangers Are You?” quizzes, their corpsefucking glurge, sitting side-by-side with their “branded content” like “12 Most Crunchtastic TV Moments Brought to You by Frito Lay,” subsidizing imperial stenographer Rosie Gray’s smears of Max Blumenthal (an actual journalist),  powered by an aggregation model that comes pretty close to plagiarism even when it doesn’t devolve into the serial copy-and-pasting of Benny Johnson…

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Robin Williams on Loneliness

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Mork & Mindy: In Mork We Trust (#1.21)” (1979)

Orson: The report, Mork.

Mork: This week I discovered a terrible disease called loneliness.

Orson: Do many people on Earth suffer from this disease?

Mork: Oh yes sir, and how they suffer. One man I know suffers so much he has to take a medication called bourbon, even that doesn’t help very much because then he can hear paint dry.

Orson: Does bed rest help?

Mork: No because I’ve heard that sleeping alone is part of the problem. You see, Orson, loneliness is a disease of the spirit. People who have it think that no one cares about them.

Orson: Do you have any idea why?

Mork: Yes sir you can count on me. You see, when children are young, they’re told not to talk to strangers. When they go to school, they’re told not to talk to the person next to them. Finally when they’re very old, they’re told not to talk to themselves, who’s left?

Orson: Are you saying Earthlings make each other lonely?

Mork: No sir I’m saying just the opposite. They make themeslves lonely, they’re so busy looking out for number one that there’s not enough room for two.

Orson: It’s too bad everybody down there can’t get together and find a cure.

Mork: Here’s the paradox sir because if they did get together, they wouldn’t need one.