Category Archives: Allegory

Operation Global Media Domination: Dog Days

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TIAOkay, so what did we learn from yesterday's Scooby adventures? That puppy posts fucking suck for hits.

To rectify the situation:

Clay Aiken and Michael Sandecki are, reports a source I never saw or heard of before, engaged and looking to get married in California before a ban goes into effect.

Does this have anything to do with dogs? Only 50/50 since Clay got that hawt makeover. Do I think it's true? Look, regardless of any and all sterling qualities that may be possessed by Michael Sandecki possibly including the ability to execute quarter-turns, after what Clay Aiken must have learned about fandom over the past few months Aiken would have to be wall-crawlingly, moon-howlingly, alien-talkingly and officially certifiably insane to even consider marrying one of his own fans.

And I speak as a fan.

pixillation: a relative situation

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as in, after pulling the second all-nighter in 72 hours, I’m not sure which of the two of us is more pixillated: me or this ancient Scooby Doo remix video.

Ah, I can’t figure it out. But I’m not the only one with that problem, as you can see from this video of Shaggy and Scooby’s encounter with some of BC’s finest export.

Bollywood Beatles

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Okay, look. Let's be honest. If the lead singer here were a white boy dancing like that he wouldn't get the girl; he'd get the tongue depressor forced between his teeth, a double dose of clonazepam, and the snazzy jacket with the extra-long sleeves that buckle in the back. Those backup boys can rock it out, it must be said. The lyrics are a bit messy, though, a little too brutally honest. "We also create false promises" eh?

From Boingboing:

In this youtube, a band identified as the "Indian Beatles" performs a totally rockin' version of "I Wanna Hold Your Hand" in Hindi…

Commenters on the YouTube page add more details. The song is "Tumse Hai Dil Ko" from the film "Jaanwar" — and this: "The camera work is exceptional, the singing great, and the fact that this was just 1 year after the Beatles' appearance on the Ed Sullivan show makes this work of adaptive plagiarism all the more impressive."

And the lyrics:

Look, no one knows yet
Look, no one knows yet
My heart loves you
My heart loves you

Look, no one knows yet
Look, no one knows yet
My heart loves you
My heart loves you

We meet because of destiny
We also create false promises
We meet because of destiny
we also create false promises

My heart loves you
My heart loves you
Look, no one knows yet
Look, no one knows yet
My heart loves you
My heart loves you

the scooby doo project

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Just what it sounds like:

The Blair Witch Project, the way it was meant to be.

The police press conference:

the videotape left in the van, Part One

the second half of the video left in the van:

friends don’t let friends post drunk

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Drunk Test

Just what it says. There are breathalyzers and bartenders who will tell you when you're too drunk to drive, but until now there has been nothing for the solitary cyberboozer. Save yourself from the frantic and morbid morning-after cache-surfing oh god, what did I post…oh god, what did I post…with this quick and easy online test.

Mirsky's Drunk Browsing Test

Introduction
Take the Test!

and check out the way-so-classy sponsorship link: Top Gun DUI Defense Attorney® Myles L. Berman ("Friends don't let friends plead guilty"TM )

drunk