I don’t care what you think; Charo‘s greatest talent is flamenco guitar, and here is the proof. Although her ability to wear the hell out of a sequined orange pants suit should not be underestimated.
Sorry, I’m on a lolroll. Like a rickroll, but lol-ier. Allow Stephen Fry, possibly greatest living Brit of his generation, to explain the essential difference between the British and the American peoples, in this ad for Twining’s Tea which I stole from EliyahuBenMoshe.
I think that sweet Tyrone knows all about his ding-a-ling, don’t you?
Don’t tell me you’ve never looked out on a dance floor and thought this.
The unusually well-chosen Zombie Playlist:
Please do not mistake these zombies for this Zombie. Nor this one neither.
Thinking it over, if zombies were behind the Disco Revolution then the innate feelings of revulsion which it caused in all right-thinking people were only our own instincts trying to warn us. Naturally it was taken up by the teeming, brainless masses. You know the type: “Oh, a trail of blood. Let’s follow it!” Next minute some zombie is going all sippy-cup with their cranium.
All I can say is, if you loved Disco and still miss it, the zombies probably ate your brain back in 1983 and you didn’t even notice. How are you enjoying middle-management?
I think Joan Rivers must simply have had all the skin on her face removed and replaced with a lifelike latex substitute; that’s the only thing that accounts for the fact she can still pull any kind of an expression at all. When she relaxes, though, she does look like one of those aliens from Communion.
In one of the many, many millions of magazines I have lying around the house lies one article which puts Botox in its proper context. Just as Dominick Dunne put crime into a moral context (which is really the primary context in which those events take place) so this article, which I cannot find, by a woman whose name I cannot recall, looked at cosmetic surgery in a fundamentally meaningful, humanistic context. I do not know why this article is, as far as I can tell, alone in the world. I do not know why no-one else has examined the social and cultural impact of Botox. But I do know, it asked some very important questions.
First among those is:
What will become of a society in which women are unable to express negative emotion?
Do you remember when you were a child, and you’d watch your mother for clues as to what was going on and whether or not it was a problem? What if those clues never came? What if all you had to depend on were her words?
Botox is censorship of the body. You think you’re only banning the bad words, but like an over-aggressive spamfilter that won’t let you open the Breast Cancer Charity fundraising site, it cuts you off from things you may not realize are both negative and positive. How’d you like to discover that too late?
I can’t even imagine being a fortysomething man trying to date age-appropriate, financially secure women; there would be no clues at all in her face if you happened to say something that struck a nerve. You would never know when to back off. You would never see the vulnerability. You would, to a meaningful extent, be cut off from an important part of that woman’s basic humanity.
As would be all other people.
And what must it do to them?