Category Archives: marketing

come see me at social media camp in Victoria, May 5-7

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Who likes free lunches? EVERYONE! Who likes saving money? Pretty much those very same people! Now you can attend Canada’s biggest and best purely social media conference in one of the world’s prettiest cities, save $100 on registration, and have lunch on and with me. Given the number of lunches other people have bought for me, it’s kinda the least I can do.

Kittens explain social media, they explain everything.

Kittens explain social media, they explain everything.

Yes kittens, I’m headed back to the #YYJ for another Social Media Camp, Canada’s largest social media conference, in gorgeous downtown Victoria. I know that’s a cliche, but it’s literally true and I don’t know anyone who isn’t thrilled at an excuse to go to this spectacular city.

This year I’ll be speaking on Marketing the Mystery; in other words, how to use social media to drum up interest in something when you’re not actually allowed to say what it is. I’m using the @WhatsPineApple campaign that we’re running for Steve Wozniak as my specific material here. What’s PineApple? All will be revealed by Woz at the Business Rocks conference in Manchester, April 21-22, which means I’ll finally be free to talk about it by the time Social Media Camp rolls around.

social media camp

I may or may not also be doing an informal chat-style talk on how writers can use social media to boost readership and sales. That depends on finding a room for it, or alternately on attendees buying me pints at the pub. I’m easy, and Victoria is the spiritual home of the Canadian brew pub tradition.

AND thanks to organizer Paul Holmes, I’ve got a juicy discount code for you, kittens! Regular camp tix are $699 and go up to $999 for the Rock Star pass, but a limited number of camp tickets have been made available at $599. But with this sweet, sweet discount code you get $100 off whichever package you buy, and you get a free lunch, on me. And with me. This is good news for you, as I am a restaurant snob and will take you somewhere nice, I promise. Your super-secret discount code is: Raincoaster.

Clicky, clicky, you know you want to. $200 off Canada’s best social media conference AND a free lunch with your humble editor in one of the world’s best undiscovered foodie destinations. DO EET. Guy Fawkes mask optional, we’re not formal here.

Fabulous Fascists!

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Prince is the KING of fashionable fascists

Prince is the KING of fashionable fascists

I forget who said it (when in doubt, blame Diana Vreeland) but it’s true: fascists have the best uniforms. Imagine what they could do if they really let themselves go!

They could do this. From Pseudonymous (for obvious reasons) Middle Eastern Internet Artist Saint Hoax comes the ultimate recipe for a dictator.

The recipe for an iconic queen:
1- Flamboyant name
2- Fierce persona
3- Defining outfits
4- Personalized hairdo
5- A trademark feature
6- One hell of a PR teamI then realized that it takes that same exact effort to make a leader.
A rush of images containing Hitler’s mustache, Bin laden’s headgear, Obama’s campaigns, Saddam’s narcism crossed through my mind. It got me thinking that behind every “great” man, there’s a queen.Like drag queens, political/religious leaders are expected to entertain, perform and occasionally lip-sync a public speech.
But unlike drag queens, the fame hungry leaders don’t know when to take their costumes off.

Hitleria Hysteria

Hitleria Hysteria

Queen Abby

Popette Benny Madame O'Sane Georgia Buchette Vladdy Pushin Ossie B Baricka O'Bisha Kimmy Jungle

Operation Global Media Domination: The Bright Side of the Dark Side

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The Dark Lord welcomes you, recruit

The Dark Lord welcomes you, recruit

Before there was Voldemort, there was Vader. And before there was Vader, the world knew another as “The Dark Lord,” and I’m not even talking about Conrad Black.

He lives yet.

In fact, he owns Gawker.

And today, he broke me.

After how many years of me refusing to write for him for free (while still contributing thousands of words a week in the form of snippy comments and tips) tonight I finally gave in and….Kinja‘d. Twice!

It was…scary.

But it’s about the highest-profile outlet I have since I let this poor blog peter down to virtually nothing, so I posted a couple of articles that have had, through no fault of their own, failed to find a home.

Relive the Cold War for Fun and Profit:

how the Russian government hacked the US energy industry, and why the Ukrainian uprising might make the entire three-year project entirely moot

and

Snitching for Dollars: The BSA wants you to rat out your boss!

In my own defence, it did take something like eight years to wear me down. Should the posts get zero momentum despite being on a Gawker platform, the experiment will not be repeated. While I was at it, I updated my Media and Public Speaking page. You know I’m all about Operation Global Media Domination! Now, bring me that audience!

Hail Vader! Hail Operation Global Media Domination!

Hail Vader! Hail Operation Global Media Domination!

Someone’s going to be MADD at these guys

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Now, is that a social media fail, or a marketing fail, or a just plain tragic any-way-you-look-at-it fail? Whatever it is, you just stay classy, Zimbabwe, you stay classy!

Easy Riders

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Why do sexists get a bum rap?

Why do sexists get a bum rap?

This is the kind of marketing we can all get behind.

MotoCorsa a Ducati dealership in Portland shot an entire series of stereotypical “hot girl with bike” shots with a red bike, releasing the portfolio as “seDucative” which, ha ha. Then they did the same shots, using men who worked at the shop as models. God only knows where they found a tube top that size, but they did.

It’s the details that make the shoot, like the fact that they called this “Manigale” in reference to the Ducati 1199 Panigale. And that they gave the guys 11/4″ heels instead of the 4″ ones the female model is wearing. Well, presumably if you work in a motorcycle shop you need to use your legs for something other than posing, and a charleyhorse could be a career-blocking impediment to a day spent…I dunno, chatting up Ben Affleck?

You can see the whole series at AsphaltAndRubber.