Category Archives: publishing

Operation Global Media Domination: The Bright Side of the Dark Side

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The Dark Lord welcomes you, recruit

The Dark Lord welcomes you, recruit

Before there was Voldemort, there was Vader. And before there was Vader, the world knew another as “The Dark Lord,” and I’m not even talking about Conrad Black.

He lives yet.

In fact, he owns Gawker.

And today, he broke me.

After how many years of me refusing to write for him for free (while still contributing thousands of words a week in the form of snippy comments and tips) tonight I finally gave in and….Kinja‘d. Twice!

It was…scary.

But it’s about the highest-profile outlet I have since I let this poor blog peter down to virtually nothing, so I posted a couple of articles that have had, through no fault of their own, failed to find a home.

Relive the Cold War for Fun and Profit:

how the Russian government hacked the US energy industry, and why the Ukrainian uprising might make the entire three-year project entirely moot

and

Snitching for Dollars: The BSA wants you to rat out your boss!

In my own defence, it did take something like eight years to wear me down. Should the posts get zero momentum despite being on a Gawker platform, the experiment will not be repeated. While I was at it, I updated my Media and Public Speaking page. You know I’m all about Operation Global Media Domination! Now, bring me that audience!

Hail Vader! Hail Operation Global Media Domination!

Hail Vader! Hail Operation Global Media Domination!

Hump Day Unicorn Chaser: what did you do yesterday raincoaster edition

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I'm a fucking unicorn

I’m a fucking unicorn

Truth be told, I’m not really feeling the whole Unicorn Chaser phenomenon, but it’s fucking Wednesday so here you go with the kyoot kittehs and assorted adorbz shit.

Snuggie-clad ProtoGay Performs Beyonce:

Seriously, The Thuggie should give that kid some money and backup dancers from Glee and shoot their own commercial. 105,000 views in ten days isn’t scruffy.

If that wasn’t gay enough, let’s have a Kiki!

Okay, your unicorn chaser cutemeister is officially outta here.

Dandelion bailing the fuck outta here

Dandelion bailing the fuck outta here

Time to get real. IF this internet will let me (Starbucks, we’re gonna have words, I tell ya; when Wind mobile is faster, you KNOW you’ve got a problem).

So, what did your intrepid blogger do yesterday, you’re all wondering? Yes? Put your plausible faces on, audience, I like a little effort on your part.

  1. Interviewed Anonymous for an hour and a half on the Par:AnoIA leaks site. Got trolled, what do you expect? but survived.
  2. Sent another list of questions to State Rep Dan Gordon of Rhode Island (this is the third time; he says he’ll answer this time, who knows, he even might)
  3. Sent an email interview question list to Brian Vidovic of EXP bar and restaurant, which hopes to open soon IF they can get this tsuris with their liquor license cleared up.
  4. Interviewed John Young, the founder of Cryptome (and a co-founder of WikiLeaks) and god, wasn’t THAT an experience and a half. Post should be up on the Daily Dot tomorrow, and will be epicsauce. Unless your initials are DDB or JA. Or raincoaster. But how did he KNOW I was a deranged terrorist?
  5. Actually got a workout done, 20 minutes on the stationary bike but better than nothing. I’m doing a 30 day boot camp thingy, so far so good.
  6. Deciphered a math puzzle GIF at 4am, found out the original poster back in 2004, found an alternate version of the same puzzle with the opposite result, found the most lucid and easy to follow explanation on the net, and wrote it up for my Morning GIF: the Fibonacci Bamboozle. God I wish I had to go to a party with math nerds, so I could wear a tank dress with a spiral of sequins on it and explain I was wearing “Fibonacci Sequins!”
  7. Tweaked my Adsense account and ads on Lolebrity.net
  8. Set up monetization on my YouTube channel, but for whatever reason I can’t activate it on the video with over a million views. Ranted at Support after taking 45 minutes to FIND support at YouTube.
  9. Storified the epic Twitter battle between the new @AnonymousIRC and @Wikileaks.
  10. Read several apparently-still-classified documents on infosec and learned a great deal.
  11. Scored half price sushi at T&T for dinner, keeping strictly to my No Flour, No Sugar, No Salt diet. Oh, and did all this while getting in an hour and a half of walking as well.
  12. Felt smug right up until falling asleep face-first in my book.

Which reminds me it’s time to get off the internet, jam some food down my gullet, and get my workout in for today. What did I do today? Pitched four stories or five, can’t remember, wrote up the John Young interview, revised it, waited…waited…waited, went and got my other blog posts up.

Forum Follies: I CAN’T HEER U!

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People sometimes ask me why I spend so much time answering questions in the WordPress.com technical support forums.

For the lulz, people. For the lulz.

  1. I SELL VIVID ICU MEDICAL FICTION.
    I WANT MISSPELLED NAMES OF OTHER MEDICAL SITES TO BE REDIRECTED TO MY SITE.
    HEY, THEY MIGHT BUY MY BOOK.
    HOW DO I DO THIS?
    I OWN DOMAIN MAPPING FOR MY SITE LUNGLORD.COM.
    AS FOR YOUR HELP- MUCH APPRECIATED.
    BUT BE SPECIFIC. ONE TWO THREE FOUR.
    I AM A WRITER NOT COMPUTER CLEVER.

    HELP ME OF WORDPRESS SAGES YOU’RE MY ONLY HOPE.

    LUNGLORD

  2. Please stop posting all in capitals – it’s making my ears hurt.

  3. Aaaaaagh! Stop SHOUTING! No need for the capitals, we’re not all blind as bats.

  4. THEY DONT CALL HIM THE LUNG LORD FOR NOTHING YOU NOW

  5. EH? SPEAK UP! :)

  6. IS YOUR BOOK IN ALL CAPS TOO? IN COMIC SANS?

  7. When someone in cyberspace is TYPING AN ENTIRE SENTENCE OR PARAGRAPH IN ALL CAPITAL LETTERS, that person is SHOUTING. It is not proper netiquette to TYPE IN ALL CAPS and it makes whatever you typed very difficult for others to read.

  8. WHAT???

    And you would just have to find out by looking at popular websites. that’s the only way.

  9. thank you al fur the same crticsm- that n my haste I just typed nd ntered wen i should hve throughly and prrecisely proofed mi text furst for errorrrs beford subbmiting. Hooever isn charge canned delete this quession fur my grate offinse to protocol. tank you all for c ing past the superficiality of my hummble errrorr and helping mee. It is guud to know peeepole thgat though they correct u they also go a head and help you two.

  10. It only works as parody if we have reason to believe it’s not your house style.

Help Us Help You Help Us All: The Shebeen Club May Meeting!

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Mr. Grumpy Pants

Shamelessly stolen from the Shebeen Club, which is officially as of right now no longer my baby! Yes, I wrapped it in swaddling clothes and put it in a wicker basket and took it down to the river and…found out wicker baskets don’t float, so I complained online until somebody solved my problem, as per usual.

Why so serious, pookie?

Has your writing career got you down? Things not falling into your lap like those unicorn rainbows and lollipop dreams would have it? Wondering what to do and how to do that (short of offering to sleep with Jack McClelland)?

THEN YOU NEED TO COME TO THE MAY MEETING OF THE SHEBEEN CLUB!

What with raincoaster heading off to places to our north so as to discover new alcohol-based uses for ice, The Shebeen Club is being forced on a new sucker transferred to a new, bright, shining set of hands! Ian Alexander Martin (a guy comfortable with writing about himself in the 3rd person) wants to know what you — yes, you — want to see in the meetings!

Come on down to the Rebel Room, put him in a sleeper hold, and then calmly explain what you need to learn about and who should explain it to you as a presenter.

The best way to get what you want is to say what that is. No one is willing to admit they can read minds, so join us on Tuesday, May 24th at 7pm for a timely, lively discussion by you and other intelligent people who are writers, publishers, literary agents, PR and Media people, or just plain people involved in that Publishing Biz. Bring your questions, suggestions, and your brain!

As always, tickets are $20 in advance [Eventbrite Link; let us know you’re coming and we’ll give you the early bird price] (available till May 23rd) or $25 at the door, and that includes dinner and a drink. The venue is the upstairs lounge at Revel Room, 238 Abbott Street just south of Gastown.

  • Revel Room: 238 Abbott Street just south of Gastown [need a map? CLICK HERE]
  • JUST $20!! GET YOUR TICKETS HERE! [Eventbrite Link!] includes dinner!
  • …or, bring $25 cash on the evening
  • Tuesday, May 24th
    • 7:00 – 7:30 meet & mingle
    • 7:30 – 8:00-ish listen & learn

Selah.

Shebeen Club tonight at Rogue

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Shebeen Club S

Shebeen Club S is for Scribes!

Just a reminder that tonight’s Shebeen Club meeting, Going Pro with Sylvia Taylor, is at Rogue Kitchen and Wetbar, in Waterfront Station skytrain/seabus station. They’ve developed a terrific seasonal menu for us, too, and of course they offer all the fabulous microbrews of their partner in crime, Steamworks Brew Pub. We have lots of space in our private room, so you can just show up and join us at 7pm tonight: $25 at the door.

Choice of Entrées:

1. Coconut Poached Chicken Salad

snap peas, red & yellow peppers, mixed greens,

thin asian noodles, sesame soy dressing

2. Mediterranean Penne

kalamata olives, basil, tomatoes, artichokes,

yellow peppers, goat cheese

3. The 9.2 oz Rogue Burger

home ground sirloin burger cooked to 160

degrees farenheit, sesame brioche bun, bacon,

cheddar, lettuce, tomato, pickle, sweet relish,

mayo, hand-cut kennebec fries

4. Fresh Halibut Tacos

seared cajun-spices halibut, avocado cream,

mango salsa, fennel coleslaw, white flour tortilla