Ya gotta luv these shrivelled little hearts made of tar. Even more vicious than AA Gill!
A snippet is reproduced here. Read the full horror of the
report post-mortem here.
As for the Sternum of Doom… what meteor carved that crater? Did her pact with the devil go bad? Did Simon Cowell carve it out with a spoon? Did it sacrifice itself to become a chin or cheek implant? Did a nearby stripper accidentally ding her by sneezing while launching a ping-pong missile out of her nether region?