today in gruesomely decayed sea monster news

Well mate, it’s abaout bloody toime we had some Sea Monsteh news ‘raond these pahts. Woi’ve bin calamari-deficient feh fah too long.

Oi say we call this one “Sakhalin Sally.”

Ain't she a beauty? Crikey!

Ain’t she a beauty? That evah-reloiable fave-rit o’ soientific jehnalists everywheh, EnglishRussia.com has the repoht.

This creature was found by Russian soldiers on Sakhalin shoreline. Sakhalin area is situated near to Japan, it’s the most eastern part of Russia, almost 5000 miles to East from Moscow (Russia is huge). People don’t know who is it. According to the bones and teeth – it is not a fish. According to its skeleton – it’s not a crocodile or alligator. It has a skin with hair or fur. It has been said that it was taken by Russian special services for in-depth studies, and we are lucky that people who encountered it first made those photos before it was brought away.

Crikey! She's hyoooooooooooge!

Crikey, she’s a big one, eh? She’d hah bin byoodeeful swimmin’ in the woild. But if ye’d be lookin’ at heh teeth an’ saying te yesself, “It looks loike a hohse’s skull upsoide-daown” we’d be thinkin’ the exact saime thing, mate.

But an owld one, roit?

But thet doesn’t accaont feh heh taiol, do it?

See whot Oi moine?

Whot a pity we nevah got ta see this gehl in the woild, swimmin’ free. Aw man, Oi think Oi’m gonna go ave a croi naow.

62 thoughts on “today in gruesomely decayed sea monster news

  1. Steven_L says:

    What on Earth is it? It looks like a cross between a crocodile, komodo dragon and a camel. The teeth look like a herbivores teeth though so I guess we are safe to go for a paddle.

  2. raincoaster says:

    Looks like it’s a decayed whale, and the “hair” is seaweed. Unfortunately, nothing interesting.

  3. Miss Jaime says:

    Whatever it is, I bet it ate some Taco Bell that someone threw off their 60 ft. yacht, had a heart attack and died…..floating to shore.

  4. raincoaster says:

    If it had eaten Taco Bell, it would have exploded.

  5. Ritesh says:

    This seem an amazing creature from beyond belief. I’m a scientist and i’ve been studying sea monsters for years and came to the conclusion that sea monster are descendant of pheristoric animals and they still exist.

  6. Ritesh says:

    And by the way Miss Jaime, it couldn’t have eaten Taco Bell cause we wouldn’t been able to see it’s decomposed body as it would have been explosed…

  7. jhon says:

    Dude It might be some wierd migrating saltwater crocidile, but im not much of a skeptic I believe in seamonsters. Peace out ”From the States”.

  8. jhon says:

    P.S. my real name isent really jhon.

  9. jhon says:

    your name isint rain coaster

  10. raincoaster says:

    It ISint? OMG WTF LOL!

  11. Jennie says:

    Is there any posssibility is could be a dead loepard seal? I heard those things are pretty big. The skull structure looks mammal like as well.

  12. raincoaster says:

    I’ve seen leopard seals, and they’re not THAT big. Also, their skulls are much shorter, like a spaniel’s rather than a greyhound’s if you know what I mean. Usually these kinds of things are put down to basking sharks, but the bones here (sharks have no actual bones except the jaw, I think) would indicate that it’s a small carnivorous whale. The skull looks so much like a horse’s that I had assumed it was a fake, but the commenters on the original site seem to present a good case for a small whale.

  13. TipTii says:

    Dude
    It’s a freaking crocodile tail with a random skull at the end. They covered up where they meet with either some really old seaweed or animal leftovers that washed a-shore.

    Come on people…Gotta try harder than that

  14. raincoaster says:

    Come on, those aren’t croc teeth. And it’s a lot easier to get a whale to Sakhalin than it is to get a crocodile there; it’s in Siberia.

  15. Kavo7 says:

    Possibley, this creature is nothing more than a dead baby Orca.

  16. raincoaster says:

    I’d say that’s the likeliest idea so far.

  17. Metro says:

    I think it’s the twin Karl Rove ate in the womb.

  18. raincoaster says:

    Nah, even Rove’s head’s not that pointy.

  19. deuxya says:

    nooooo nooooo noooooo russian

    photo Guinea ???

    http://english.pravda.ru/photo/report/sea_monster-1816/1/

  20. jack says:

    it looks like one of those prehistoric platypus

  21. raincoaster says:

    Sure, sure, and the Monster of Montauk looks like a raccoon.

  22. Aka says:

    I’ve been to Sakhalin lately just this summer and I’ve never heard on the news any of IT… But I agree it does look like a prehistoric Platypus…^_^

  23. Bloop says:

    It’s a beaked whale carcass that no one is willing to admit is a beaked whale carcass. The original report that was made on this “creature” explained that it couldn’t be a fish, or a crocodile or alligator. First of all, it could very well be an salt-water crocodile that lost its way and froze to death (being that crocs are cold blooded and russia is freezing). However, judging by its teeth, it is almost undeniably whale. It doesn’t have crocodilian, or even remotely reptilian, teeth. What’s long, has obviously mammalian features, and lives in the water? A whale. I hope we all feel very special.

  24. jhon says:

    so in reality what is this animal?

  25. raincoaster says:

    The consensus is, it’s a small whale. But nobody knows for sure.

  26. pete says:

    i believe it might be a whale, but i didnt know whales had teeth like that!it also MIGHT be sum sort of head connected by seaweed that either sum1 put 2gether OR… they just found it like that☺i like the platypus idea thought, this stuf really makes u think!

  27. samantha says:

    i think it is not even real how do you know somone made it and put it there ?

  28. raincoaster says:

    How do YOU know someone made it and put it there? Idle speculation, as we’ve noted elsewhere, is meaningless.

  29. skykid says:

    hay pete a whale has teeth justlike that.i think its a prehistoric animal like a dead baby leoploradon if it is cool

  30. skykid says:

    leoploradons have teeth like that to but they were meat eaters. during dinosars but it cuold be a baby whale.

  31. skykid says:

    you never know???????????????????????????????

  32. scientist says:

    i am a marine biologist dr.dracon- by the looks of this animal it has quite a long body and herbivorous looking teeth shows it eats plants etc- looking at the shape of its head it just looks like a whale, as swell as the thickness of the rib cage area and then getting thinner towards the end, but it should have two arm looking bones (fins) coming out of the side. but these bones are quite thin so they would of decayed. so my view of this skeleton is that it is just a whale that has died of possibly old age or a fight has just washed up on the shore of the beach.

  33. raincoaster says:

    But are there herbivorous whales?

  34. scientist says:

    i am a marine biologist dr.dracon- by the looks of this animal it has quite a long body and herbivorous looking teeth – looking at the shape of its head it just looks like a whale, as well as the thickness of the rib cage area and then getting thinner towards the end, but it should have two arm looking bones (fins) coming out of the side. but these bones are quite thin so they would of decayed. so my view of this skeleton is that it is just a whale that has died of possibly old age or a fight has just washed up on the shore of the beach.

  35. scientist says:

    ps im not really a marine biologist im a 14 yr old girl who is an a grade student :)

  36. G Eagle Esq says:

    Well done, pScientist. you had me phooled. we had expected a Biologic Evolutionista to of followed Plausible albeit Idiosyncratic Grammmar/punctuating

    Elgae yarg

  37. raincoaster says:

    Also, pscientists do not psay “the shore of the beach.” Most particularly pscientists who get A’s.

  38. sabbath180 says:

    at first from far i thought it was a croc or aligator now i dont know wut it is??? =/

  39. raincoaster says:

    Whale. I think that’s been established by now.

  40. jamie says:

    you know guys i think this whole whale thing works for the neck down but the head is deffinately not of whale origin. the head looks more like that of a horse or larger heribivore such as a large cow. whale’s teeth are nothing like that im afraid… their main diet is krill which are small crustations like shrimp and they have specially designed teeth like long narrow needles to deal with captureing their food.
    im afrid its just a big hoax… and believe me i would love it not to be but that head is certainly not from a sea-bound mammel.
    just to elaborate tho, if i were to be wrong, i would most likely say it was a sea cow… however it would have to be a bloody big one… and it would have had to have lost a few crucial teeth…

  41. raincoaster says:

    I see you’re only familiar with baleen whales. Nobody who’d seen orcas in the wild, as I have, would make that mistake. Sea cows don’t normally roam the beaches of Siberia, nor do they have horse-like heads; they are much more square, like a dog’s.

  42. jamie says:

    Hey.by orca you mean the ‘killer whale’? cos if so i dont think you are really looking at the creature we see in photo above. The creature in this picture has teeth which are adapted to a herbiverous diet… it has molar teeth where the ‘killer whale’ has teeth adapted to catching and eating live prey such as fish. if you dont mean the killer whale could you specify the latin name so i can research the animal further.
    to my knowledge tho i cannot remember seeing or hearing of a whale which would eat ‘grass’ (see grass) or other sea bound vegetation.

    cheers

  43. jamie says:

    an just for clarification, i didnt mean to say the head was horse-like. i meant to say it was the head of a horse… someone has just attached it to the body and covered the joint with the mess of rotten flesh or sea-weed around its ‘neck’. an the sea cow was simply a guess, i dont really believe it or that it is a whale… not a full one anyway.

  44. ginger says:

    Its obviously NOT a type of whale. the skull is far too slim compareson to the length of the skull. i’m not a expert on sea life but i have never seen anything like this before and by the sounds of it nore has anyone else. The teeth are a HUGE give away to its habitat. its not from the sea or any rivers or lakes. the teeth are not designed to catch fish or even eat fish. a fish could slip away from teeth like the ones in the picture.

  45. raincoaster says:

    Then horses swim and are ten feet long?

  46. ginger says:

    i never said it was a horse, it could be a species of crocodile which hasn’t been discovered yet. maybe what ever it is, it could of became extinct by now.
    maybe its a species of dinosaur, it looks a bit like a lipleredon. but lopleredon are not 10 feet long, they are 25 metres long, but it could be a dinosaur.

  47. arne says:

    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Steller%27s_Sea_Cow

    something that might be the thing ? it told was extinct since 1768 but since its very hard to track sea creatures that is rare it might be it

  48. raincoaster says:

    You could be right. The sea is a mysterious place, that’s for sure.

  49. rhianna says:

    i reckon its a baby lochness monster notice the long neck. I do reckon it is one thts had its head cut off because there wouldnt be a plain old line in the sea.

  50. bobby gurl says:

    okay, this can not be a crocidle nor a whale.
    1. no crocidles in japan.
    2. whales do Not have a beak like that.

    but it could be a mix of them with something else like an eel. and who care bout taco bell or whatevr. so what, in america, we’ve had a metior shower in missigon, a volcano erupted in iceland causing iceland to melt, and we’ve had one of these creatures here ourselves. we have had it captive but wasnt able to live in a tank and died. bout resent updates on it had shown that this magisical creature was a eel shark and platupus all together.
    department of science <3 :)

  51. raincoaster says:

    If whales do not have a beak, why is there a whale called the Beaked Whale?

    How do you mate an eel shark and a platypus, particularly since neither of them are native to Missigon, which is presumably Michegan?

  52. iliah says:

    ITS A MOSASAUR@!@!@!@ just letting u know

  53. bima says:

    Fake.
    Every time there is a picture but it is taken in a way the you are not able to see details…it is Fake!

  54. raincoaster says:

    Another unsubstantiated accusation. Where is your picture proving it’s a fake? Where is your sea monster skeleton Flickr bling, eh? We will stand for no random accusations, pulled out of the asses of passers-by!

    NO! We will not stand it I say! See:
    http://raincoaster.com/2007/04/01/mummified-fairy-remains-found/

  55. amy godfrey says:

    I think it is a aligater or a crocodile which has either died or been killed and little animals have been eating it.

  56. raincoaster says:

    In Siberia? How did it get to Siberia?

  57. The same way everyone gets to Siberia – exile.

  58. G Eagle Esq says:

    Except for the Guards

  59. Thomas BoBandy Sutton says:

    this is just the decayed carcass of an odontocete whale. most likely a young sperm whale or an orca. the “Fur” is just decaying flesh. the same mistake has been made with the zuiyo maru monster

  60. raincoaster says:

    Ooh, a new seamonster! We must investigate.

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