Harry Potter and the treasure trail of statutory doom

Daniel Radcliffe nekkid

Yes, it’s Daniel Radcliffe, nekkid as a jaybird.

Now we know why Sirius had to die. In isolated parts of Nunavut, they could simply have gotten married…

Thanks to the intrepid and ever-vigilant Perez, we now know that the “and two veg” vastly outshines the “meat”, meaning wee Mr. Radcliffe is not only low in calories, but he’s a good source of cancer-fighting phytochemicals. Serve lomi-lomi-style.

Thank me later. Like, when he’s legal.

For more nekkid Radcliffe, check the ol’ raincoaster blog for the play’s poster; for his Match.com profile, and to watch him put the moves on Diana Rigg (also, apparently this photo here is fake, so don’t even think of saving it to your hard drive, posting it in your blog, setting it as your wallpaper, or printing it out poster-sized for hanging in multiples all around your bathroom or boudoir. Don’t even think about it)

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132 thoughts on “Harry Potter and the treasure trail of statutory doom

  1. chitty says:

    Watching a Harry Potter movie will never be the same again. Especially now that he has shown us his wand.

  2. raincoaster says:

    What worries me is that he’s showing signs of trying to grow Creative Facial Hair.

    This is a no-fly zone for ol’ raincoaster here. It’s a dealbreaker. The last person who could get away with creative facial hair was Satan, and look where it got him.

  3. Metro says:

    Hey–nothing wrong with facial hair except in three forms:

    Long Sideburns: I’d like to try for muttonchops but Mum won’t let me/I can’t grow a full beard yet. Looks dumb on 14-year-olds, dumber on the company president.

    The Miami Vice look: In a military uniform you could be second banana in a banana republic. But in Banana Republic you’re a respectable professional?

    Soul patch: The merkin for men.

  4. raincoaster says:

    You have obviously never seen System of a Down. But then, you’re hardly objective on the subject.

  5. engtech says:

    Jesus.

    The treasure trail looks like it’s increasing logarithmically..

    which means that by the choda his follicles will reach infinity.

  6. raincoaster says:

    I know: it looks like he’s bonking a roadkill muskrat that he’s glued to his abdomen. And he doesn’t seem to be enjoying it.

    Do you think he trims it? They should do a transplant up to his chest.

  7. iwanttofitin says:

    Hehe, his bellybutton has sprouted some monster bush. That’s kind of weird.

  8. raincoaster says:

    It’s the most bizarre natural distribution of body hair I’ve ever seen.

  9. Metro says:

    I thought it was an unnatural distribution of Photoshop, myself.

  10. raincoaster says:

    Not that one, actually.

  11. shubbu says:

    hey daniel

    i had lot of respect on you.
    i’m one of your great fan ,but please don’t loose your respect.
    stop that film.
    for heaven’s sake stop that.

  12. raincoaster says:

    He’s already stopped, from what I understand; he had to do publicity for the new Harry Potter movie, so they’ve had to get someone to take over for him in the play. But he did quite well; I think it was a good career move on his part.

  13. hola bueno a mi me encanta daniel radclifee bueno yo lo quisiera cono ser yo lo amoooo

  14. abby says:

    pplz! everybody’s born naked!! we’re not born w/clothes are we?? u’ve seen urself naked! what makes this any different? OMG a penis freak out..every1 has 1!! OMG a vagina freak out, all femals have them!! jeez pplz!! grow up and realize this isn’t porn!! >.<
    God bless!

  15. raincoaster says:

    Yes, but NOBODY is born with that much hair on their navel!

  16. cjwriter says:

    I remember hearing about this before… who’d have thought Daniel Radcliffe could give Robin Williams a run for his money in the hair stakes? :)

  17. raincoaster says:

    Really…but only below the bellybutton. THat’s not so much a treasure trail as a freeway.

  18. Pinkpolkadots says:

    Wow, I mean it will be weird to watch harry potter 1&2 now seeing him so small and childish, i dont enjoy this side of him, I liked him better with his cloths on.

  19. raincoaster says:

    They grow up so fast…sniff!

  20. Potterobsessed says:

    Wooooah!!
    He’s one hairy sexy beast
    lolz
    =]

  21. raincoaster says:

    Yes, you could make a hall runner out of that.

  22. Insert Witty Username Here says:

    Woah, slightly wierd……..still shag him though :)

  23. raincoaster says:

    Yes, but wax or you could get a velcro effect.

  24. i'helping'u says:

    You should circumcise

  25. raincoaster says:

    I don’t think that affects belly hair, does it? Besides, we’re highly anti-circumchopping around these parts. We wouldn’t dock his tail or his ears, either.

  26. hayley says:

    yes he does!!!!!!!
    i love his abs!!!!!!!!
    and that new beard!
    SOOOO HOT!!!!!!

  27. raincoaster says:

    Is that GQ he’s on the cover of this month? Very nice blue eyes…that we’ve never gotten to see in Harry Potter, of course.

  28. hot!! says:

    hot hot hot!!!!
    definetly do him!
    I think im in love!

  29. i hate u!!! says:

    thats discusting i cannot believe that h would do that , if i was jk rowling i would hate u!!! i think u make urself horny perv!!!

  30. marta says:

    i think he hott good 4 ya daniel!!!!!!!!!!

  31. i hate u!!! says:

    i think the question we should be asking our selfs is why is he naked with a hourse

  32. raincoaster says:

    Um, because it’s in the play. When you’re old enough, go see it.

  33. understand this says:

    y r u bothering talking u guys don’t understand u selfes. everybody who said something good about Danniel is correct, well the ones who said tha every grow up, an its true. Young harry potter has to grow, and so does danniel Radcliffe and about the hairy things u guys r so immature, sirously listen to ur selfes, people who r hairy r considered normal, and people that shave their stomachs, chest and even privates r considere g models. u know what i mean with G.

  34. raincoaster says:

    Gay? Homosexual? Faggy? Queens? Friends of Dorothy? Fans of Liza? Fudgepackers? Twinkletoes? Meat Flute Artiste? Fairies?

  35. Mrs Dan Radcliffe says:

    WOW WOW WOW!!!!!!!!! I am DEFINATLY in luv!!! good on u dan!! ur real brave. (bytheway.. i will marri ya!!!) lol

  36. raincoaster says:

    I think you have to wait at least a year, except in Kentucky.

  37. becky stephie charlotte theressa says:

    he is way hot!
    step back ladies he is ours! so unless you have some relation to him he is ours!!!!!!
    the thing with the whole stomach is soooo laim, that shows that he is not afraid to mature unlike some!!!!
    looooooooooovvvvvvvvvvvvvveeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee uuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu dan!!!!
    XxXxXxXxXxXxXxXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXxXxXxXxXXXXxXxXxXXXXXxXxXxXxXxXxXxxXxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

  38. raincoaster says:

    Iaim? Liam? Who’s he?

  39. OutaiOkami says:

    Alright I am so fucking tired of this Dan bashing shit. He is not a child, and I tell you what, if that was Johnny Depp every last one of you would be either jerking off or fingering yourselves without regard to his effin hair. It is like understand this said, he has got to grow, and if any of you did your research on this damn play like none of you seem to have done, he does NOT have sex, the point of the play is he tries to and things go wrong, and he can’t get an erection and because of that he threatens the girl and then mutilates the horses for seeing his inability to “Perform”. So what he gets naked, this play is not about Daniel Radcliffe, it is about a troubled boy named Alan Strang. And let me remind you, his name is DANIEL RADCLIFFE NOT HARRY POTTER! He is an amazing actor, but thats the point he is an ACTOR PLAYING A CHARACTER. I thought anyone with an IQ higher than 0 would effin know that.

  40. raincoaster says:

    Mrs. Radcliffe? What are you don’t posting comments on my blog?

  41. OutaiOkami says:

    I am not, though that is pretty funny. And I found this by accident.

  42. raincoaster says:

    Well you seem quite relentless and defensive. He’s a big boy and a famous movie star. I’m sure he can handle things.

  43. valeria says:

    aaaiii papi!!!!!!!!
    yo quero mas radcliffe!!!!!!!!!

  44. OutaiOkami says:

    I am, and I am sure he can but the fact of the matter is why go and spread bullshit about him? It is pointless and beyond rude.

  45. raincoaster says:

    Poopiecaca on you then. By all means go inhabit more reverent sites. It looks like Radcliffe himself has no problem with taking the mickey; perhaps you could learn a lesson from your idol, who isn’t above throwing a condom on Diana Rigg’s head for a laugh.

  46. jessie says:

    I think Dan has something to show and besides him being naked adds up to the spice of his career and as a fan his very sexy

  47. Georgia says:

    Omg Dan u r sooooo Flippin hot
    My new Number 1 :)

  48. raincoaster says:

    New??? Who was the old one?

  49. CharlotteLouise says:

    He’s gorgeous, stop giving him greif about taking off his clothes! HES ONLY HUMAN FOR CHRISTS SAKE! He is a magnificent actor IN CHARACTER! This act only demonstrates his courage and dedication to acting! AND, for the record, he is absolutly gorgeous so why is everyone complaining?!
    And stop going on about his body hair! Its normal, at least he doesn’t wax it off like a puff. I’m sure if you went walking along any beach you would find much worse!
    Most of you people are acting very immature! I’m 14 and i can handle it!
    I completely idolise him!

  50. raincoaster says:

    Lesson #1: Do not use your real name in your email, particularly not your FULL name, or you will get a creepy stalker and maybe an identity thief too.

    Lesson #2: Do not post a live email link on the web or you will be inundated with spam.

  51. =O says:

    Whoops, You can deleat my e-mail then =/

  52. raincoaster says:

    Done. Also: best! screen! name! ever!

  53. jayz says:

    iis his penis real its looks good

  54. raincoaster says:

    I’m presuming his penis is real. As I said in the post, that photo with the penis in it is a fake.

  55. plushie says:

    where and how do you get the the website u mentioned in the “the ol’ raincoaster blog for the play’s poster; for his Match.com profile, and to watch him put the moves on Diana Rigg” part?

  56. raincoaster says:

    Click on the Daniel Radcliffe tag in the sidebar. He appeared in an episode of Extras where he tried to pick up Dame Diana Rigg (and everything and anything that moved) and had his Match.com profile up: I think that one was called Harry Potter, Dirty Dawg, but I could be mistaken.

  57. j says:

    (HARRY) potter – buy a razor

  58. raincoaster says:

    Awwwww, no way. I like the treasure trail.

  59. ragi says:

    He is soooo hairy.can he f*ck me?

  60. Charlotte says:

    CharlotteLouise, you have my same first name… but that is not the fucking point!! You need to stop day dreaming about Dan and get into the real world, sure he is cute (like a puppy-dog, otherwise your a grilled-cheese sandwich)but he’s not gonna like you if your older than 19 but hey, you like him, no big deal but go FUCK yourself since you love nude photos of Dan, that is gross… and you are all em-mature! That is why I’m writing this message! If you go look at something else to take your mind off his peck then do that!!!! And ragi… no he will not fuck you!!! If you want him to fuck go to hollywood then ask! (don’t get any ideas!!)

  61. Charlotte says:

    GROW UP, HE WILL NOT FUCK YOU!!!!! GOD DAMN WOMAN!!

  62. Charlotte says:

    Jayz, you want to give him a blow job? GROSS

  63. raincoaster says:

    Charlotte, calm down, sweetie. The thread dates back to February. I’m sure she’s taken her best shot by now.

    Besides, maybe he likes older women. Nunya bidness either way.

  64. Melissa says:

    I`m sorry, Dan, but this sucks, I really like you, but, this sucks, i dont like naked pics, youre hot, but without youre smyle, and…

  65. Annika says:

    i think that you will lose your fans getting pictures like that!!!!!

  66. raincoaster says:

    You’re post 65 in the comments thread. Something tells you you might be mistaken about that.

  67. Put clothes on! says:

    I think the camera was faulty. nudge nudge wink wink
    the camera was to high up!!
    Should have been lower!!
    But Were not perves

  68. TERE says:

    yo pienso que esta buenísimo Daniel y lastima que no pudiera ir a ver la obra hubiera sido genial…
    yo te apoyo Daniel, estás hecho un bombón

  69. [...] of a somewhat elderly yet not quite classic play is the simple fact that Daniel Radcliffe is an exhibitionistic, pervy sex maniac whose needs could not be met by his own nation of [...]

  70. bepoile says:

    ทุเรศ

  71. Noneofyourbusiness says:

    He’s a very good actor, and he hasn’t done anything wrong. That’s all I’m going to say.

  72. setine says:

    I am not gonna say much but what i am going to say is that many people like him and things like that aren’t exactly gonna go down too well with the mothers of kids who say please can we see the boy in harry potter cos he is on stage when he is in a show in london.A guy in a kids film shouldnt rele jump into the nude stuff yet thats all i am gonna say.

  73. risky says:

    any onee have daniel’s photos penis?

  74. courtney says:

    dude whats with the massive happy trail?

  75. raincoaster says:

    If it makes you happy, what’s the problem?

  76. billywest says:

    I still think Elijah Wood could kick Radcliffe’s ass. The question is, would he make him his bitch afterward?

  77. raincoaster says:

    Vice-versa, I think. But Daniel has nicer fur, it must be said!

  78. Emma says:

    OMG, är det där min lilla söta harry potter? :O

    Sexy….

  79. raincoaster says:

    Well, I understood the LAST word. Agreed!

  80. bec says:

    WOW daniels penis is WOW!!!!! but i expected something a little bigger! hey guys i got a joke 4 ya a part from the harry potter books what is the other thing that has gotten longer over the years?…………i think you get my point!!!! but his hair looks hot!!!!(on his head) lol and when did he become a hairy beast!!!

  81. udontneed2know says:

    Heyy i think he hott but i could’ve gone a loong time without seeing his hairy penis…ICK!

  82. raincoaster says:

    That’s not actually his penis; it’s a photoshop.

  83. hannah says:

    OMG u r so hunky n fit SEXY!!! i want u BAD nice bod escecially down below oh yeh i’m lovin it.

  84. hannah says:

    for his penis type equus daniel radcliffe into google on pics

  85. raincoaster says:

    Thanks. You’ll see eight billion Photoshop fakes. There are some real photos, but you won’t find them that way.

  86. kamila says:

    Aii, o dan e o amor da minha vida eu love ele ,,, ele e muito gataooo muito perfeitoo ,,, eu gosto dele do geito que ele e !!
    bj

  87. Hey so hes hot and a little hairy. I think that growing up and having hair is ok. I think that he is really doing good for himself and that this was asmart move to try and show people that he is not harry potter. He is a real human being. Grow up Magic is not real…. Hes hot and he didi good for himself i think that that should count for something. Stop doggin him all the time.

  88. raincoaster says:

    You mean like in this post from a year ago? Okaaaaaaaay! I’ll stop that right away.

  89. Jocelyn says:

    Hey look~ No matter how hairy he is, it’s natural for british people. so stick with it lol. He’s so hot so talented!!!

  90. raincoaster says:

    it’s natural for british people

    You’ve never dated an Italian, have you, Jocelyn?

  91. craig christ says:

    poeple this is old news i saw that “amazing” pictue months ago and to every moron asking will he fuck me get real he won’t even know you exist. i think he’s SOOO HOT! oh about the full frontal picture only one is real: he’s standing in front of the white horse it’s black and white

  92. raincoaster says:

    Wow, thanks for the update, Einstein. Did you happen to note that this picture was posted over a year ago?

  93. bad.boy says:

    awesome !

    wanna fuck wittu :)

  94. raincoaster says:

    You’re not my type, sweetheart.

  95. St. Calum says:

    hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………

    hes sexy but im chokin on the hair….lol…

  96. raincoaster says:

    What’s love without a little challenge?

  97. Anon says:

    sorry but that is gross…..Is he even old enough to do that kind of stuff yet….???

  98. angel says:

    omfg! (oh my furry gerbil!) i love daniel radcliffe. and i agree with everyone that he is human. we were born naked. it is normal to be hairy and especially that he’s british. but everyone that says, “oh, he’s ugly!” “oh sooo gross!” needs to shut up and get out of here because if you don’t like him, then why are you looking on this website at his sexy pictures? you need to get a life and leave him alone! besides, all you that want to screw him,,, i call first dibs on him and his sexy-licious body. so you’ll have to wait for him, won’t you? but if you’re coming in here hating my danny boy, then get the fuck outta here!

    To: daniel radcliffe

    i love you so much!

  99. raincoaster says:

    FIRST dibs? Oh, sweetie, you’re about eight years too late.

  100. ccbloom says:

    Yes, yes you do make me horny.

  101. Christian says:

    fake pic, take a look at it, its an obvious photoshop. the shading on the neck does not match the position of the head. you can even see the lines where they cut his head out

  102. big says:

    i like he

  103. MNMGirl57 says:

    I luv his eyes and abs!!!!!!!!!!

  104. raincoaster says:

    But you wouldn’t throw his upper torso out of bed for eating crackers, now would you?

  105. kat says:

    thats bloody discusting…now Rupert Grint…mmmm now your talking

  106. raincoaster says:

    Would you say the same if you knew he had novelty pubes, though?

  107. Stephanie says:

    It’s odd, but why give him such a hard time. I just wanted to ask why you posted something on your blog, to have a bitch at. It stumped me, but hey, have a nice laugh as you are OBVIOUSLY always right. (Haha)

  108. raincoaster says:

    Sweetie, what do you think a blog is FOR?

  109. shilpa says:

    i wanna sex with him

  110. shilpa says:

    pl. i wanna sex with him

  111. raincoaster says:

    I’ll be sure and let him know the next time I see him.

  112. marie says:

    I don’t care he’s still pretty damn fine to me!!!!!!

  113. genna says:

    If i had a chance i would so have sex with him YES!!!!!!!!.

  114. Ana Rojas..!! says:

    I dont really know what to think…!!! I used to love him…!! And the people who wrote whois sexy,horny or you simply loved what he did,,…!! You are so wrong… I mean, how can he put an image of him naked, or how can he permit that…???? I mean, think, you dont put you’re naked photos on internet?? do you?? eeww…. you really dont do that, that is weird…!!

    Daniel: you dissapoint me…!!!!

    Dearly, AnA rOjAsSss..!

  115. jery says:

    daniel is a gay. he is a gay star for gay film… and his penis is very small

  116. yasemin says:

    ohaaaa yani daniel’ın bu fotolarını önceden görmüştüm birinde popo su tam görünüyodu ama hiç yorm yasmamıştım ama bn den söylemesi çok korkunç bi foto bu

  117. raincoaster says:

    Why that’s just what I was going to say.

  118. Layla says:

    Okay so!!! get over it. Danielle did not wanna only be known as Potter. So he’s naked,,,big deal. And the hair.. well erm, natural i guess lmimp. He’s still mightily hot and sexy and cute. But i must say this imagine isn’t 1 that’ll be out of my mind soon lol. He’s spell is still cast on me though. AVADA KEDAVRA. mwah

  119. RadioGaGa says:

    i agree with that. grow up people! omg! he has hair there! omg! its natural dudes! d’oh. lets stop this stupid disscusion about fake hair… >.<

  120. n00b says:

    dont you guys think this is a tad disgusting

  121. raincoaster says:

    What, the nekkidness, or the comments?

  122. rebeca says:

    Harry Potter looks like a hobo lol hes a stupid idiot he looks like hes on drugs he smokes no wonder

  123. Chuckles says:

    Guys its photoshopped can you tell his abs suddently dissapeared (: its photoooooshopppppeeeddddd (: (: (:
    thank you

  124. raincoaster says:

    He doesn’t HAVE abs. He’s English.

  125. rhiannon says:

    ok he is so stupid he should go to hell

  126. rhiannon says:

    id rather have sex w/ a horse! id would be better to have horse cum up my ass than his cum!

  127. raincoaster says:

    There’s a farm in Washington State that can make your dreams come true.

  128. ooooooo says:

    its fake!i can see the neck cut off and change skin color they just put harry’s head on a pic of someone ele’s body!

  129. rhiannon says:

    oh, thanx raincoaster. i mean bitch. he is so fucking stupid. and so are you. yeah, i would dream to have a horse penis up my ass. why don’t you go have sex with him because he makes you so horny? your a fucking horses ass and you know it.

  130. rhiannon says:

    ewww. gross. if you ask me i like cody linly so much better than daniel. cody is cute, sensative, tan, kind, caring, smart, and HOT HOT HOT HOT HOT HOT HOT HOT!!!!! DANIEL IS STUPID, UNCARING, MEAN, NOT VERY BRIGHT, ETC. ETC. OH I FORGOT…HE IS UUUUUUGGGGGGGLLLLLLYYYYYYYYYYY!!!!!!!!

  131. rhiannon says:

    ok. tell him that i think he is a total rip off and he should stop dissapointing his fans w/ nasty pics. tell him to grow up and if he is that stupid that he should go on air on disney channel telling people that rhiannon kornak thinks that he should grow up and get a life. i feel sorry for you raincoaster. i do really feel sorry for you. its kinda sad that you are dating a retard like him. doing stuff like this behind his back? what kinda girlfriend are you?! geeze…i bet your just an over-sized gorrilla waiting for him to have sex w/ you. i sure hope he sees what you are doing to him on this website. leting people talk about him behind his back. geeze. grow up and get a life raincoaster. come back when you get one, will ya? by the way…nice comments…sweetie. HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HAH HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA!!! WHY SO SERIOUS???? HA HA HA HA HA.

  132. mason says:

    i think that is the sexiest thing i have ever seen.

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