Harry Potter’s Day Off

The Harry Potter saga, if it had been filmed by John Hughes. You know, there’s a certain part of me (the 80’s part) that can’t help but think this would have been way better.

according to the YouTube, I’m supposed to credit this to ‘Thewlis Rox’ @ davidthewlis.net so, thereyago!

In related news, click over the jump to today’s celebrity gossip links.

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When Worlds Collide!!!

Emma Watson and Cameron Adams/Hermione Granger and Himmione Grainghim

Emma Watson and Cameron Adams/Hermione Granger and Himmione Grainghim

via Gawker

This right here? This is the streams crossing. This is the polarity reversing back on itself and swallowing its own tail. This, my friends and stalkers, is the moment for which the celebrity-internet culture was made. Even if it did mortify one of them into deleting his Twitter account (after tweeting a no-doubt-heartfelt “Awkward!“).

This is a picture of fresh-faced ingenue Emma Watson and her perky gay pornalike, Cameron Adams, who played Himmione Grainghim in the extremely NSFchirruns Whorry Potter and the Sorcerer’s Balls.

SFW no, but amusing, yes. Yes, yes, YES!

From commenter JamesFromCambridge comes this positively magical trailer.

And I’m spent! If you’re not, toddle over to that comments section on Gawker for the biggest damn roundup of filthy Potter puns this side of Repressed Housewife Fanficdom!

Or you could just click past the jump and read some more gossip, if you’ve got the endurance! Once more into the breeches!

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on the existence of Tumblr, of Hogwarts, and of Awesomeness

Oft and oft have I been asked the purpose of that oblique, self-referential sphere of the interwebs known as Tumblr. And as oft as I have been asked, I have either answered or have asked for cash dollars upfront. But here, ladies and gentlemen and the undecided, here at last is the justification for tumblr, laid out as plainly as the schnozz on your pan. This, my friends, cannot be topped, not even by Jake Gyllenhaal on a late and sloppy Friday night.




If you got a letter saying you were accepted at Hogwarts:


You’d look up from whatever you were doing like:

You would then spend the next couple of days like:

You would then go to diagon alley and you’d be all like:

You’d go from shop to shop like:

Then, on september 1st you’d run through the barrier on platform 9 3/4 like:

You’d meet people on the hogwarts express like:

You would realise they’re just like you and you’d be all like:

Then you would jam for the rest of the year like:

THIS post right here? This is what Tumblr was invented for.

Harry Potter on the Bible

Oh dear, looks like somebody’s mad enough to curdle butterbeer!

Harry Potter will kick Judas' ass
Harry Potter will kick Judas’ ass

From JarOfHearts:







Oh dear. This will not end well.

Let’s change the subject, shall we? Howabout something nice and fluffy, like some gossip links? Wouldn’t that be nice? Sure it would:

Backstage with Dali (raincoaster)

Fresh Heiress (Ayyyy)

Who’s the Boss? (ManoloFood)

Don Draper, Math Man (Lolebrity)

The first step is admitting you have a problem, Gwyneth (AgentBedhead)

Jack Sparrow to fly again (BusyBeeBlogger)

Your annual Taylor Swift post-breakup “learning experience” post (CeleBitchy)

Boy takes Backstreet to Rehab (CelebDirtyLaundry)

Christina Hendricks, nudie Juggalo? (CelebritySmack)

Snowman of the damned (CityRag)

Imminent arrival puts crimp in Kate Hudson’s dating game (DailyStab)

Rachel Zoe repurposes (GirlsTalkinSmack)

Justin Bieber is allergic to stunt casting (HaveUHeard)

Too much macho in one photo (INeedMyFix)

Oprah cheeses out (PopBytes)

Yet another legacy model zones out (TheSkinny)

There, all better.

Christmas Programming

green money, money is green

This is so going to make me millions

Looks like I’m going to be in the hospital and offline some of Monday and much of Tuesday; I have a wonderful procedure scheduled for Tuesday in which they dope me to the gills but leave me loopily conscious, then stick a fiberoptic cable down my throat and up my bile duct, and when they find the obstruction which is causing my liver to poison itself they will laser that fucker into oblivion. Sadly, they would not hear of installing high-speed internet, even though it’s just one more cable. Whatever.

In the meantime, here is some vintage raincoaster for your enjoyment and eddificationizationism.

Random post on raincoaster.com

YouWantAPieceOfMe jewelry because EVERYBODY wants a piece of raincoaster

The Shebeen Club, for you literary types

raincoaster media, all the social media stuff you’ll ever need. Well, not quite or you’d never need to take my classes, right?

Lolebrity: doing for Jennifer Aniston and Prince Hot Ginge what 4chan did for cats

Ayyyy.com, gently making fun of celebrities.

ManoloFood, because if there’s one thing Vancouver needs, it’s another food and beverage blog.

Paypal donation. Because eventually the hospital will cut me off morphine and then I’ll need LOTS of Hendrick’s and Bombay Sapphire.

and as a reward and bloggy sort of stocking-stuffer, here is seven minutes and thirty-some-odd seconds of Severus Snape‘s most marvelously malevolent moments:

and bonus: Snape bringing sexy back