World’s Least-Cute Octopus Found

Remember when we brought you the world’s cutest octopus all the way from the frozen waters of Eastern Canada? Isn’t the little fella just adorbz?

World's Cutest Octopus, Octo-Newf

Well, now we’ve gone and found you his (literal) polar opposite: an Antipodean octopus so unstoppably noxious that that its poisonous venom flows at will even at sub-zero temperatures.

world's scariest octopus Pareledone aequipapillae

According to Wired (hey, when did they get on the Cthulhu beat? I WILL NOT BE MUSCLED OUT, YOU CARPETBAGGERS!!!):

“Antarctic octopus venom works at temperatures that would stop other venoms in their tracks,” said biochemist Bryan Fry of the University of Melbourne, who led the expedition…

The venoms are being studied as potential sources of pain-killers, Fry said, because they work on the nervous system. So far, analysis of the venom has revealed two toxins that are new to science.

Ah, but not to us Comparative Folklore majors, eh?

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7 thoughts on “World’s Least-Cute Octopus Found

  1. Cute? Look at that evil glint in its eye! Why, it’d poison a kitten as soon as look at one! I bet that’s why kittens developed into land creatures: to avoid being poisoned by antipodean octopuses.

  2. It’s the World’s Cutest! Just google it.

    By the way, even though I stole it from that government site, I still resent that they outrank me. I’m the one who called it CUTE! I AM THE ONE! DAMMIT!

    There, all better. Gee, this herbal tea really does work.

    GODDAMMIT!!!

    breathe…breathe…

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