Now, it’s not the first time the Yanks have made a move on our land. The last time they pulled this my ancestors had to go down and loot and burn the White House to discourage this kind of thing, and as we know from recent example, the gene pool has bred true.
But this time they have gone too far.
Welcome: Portraits of America, a new seven-minute film produced by Disney, will be shown in airports and embassies to woo visitors with a sanitised take on US landmarks. There are no shots of highways clogged with cars bumper to bumper. Instead, the camera pans over the wonders of the Grand Canyon, New York’s Chrysler building and the awe-inspiring power of the Niagara Falls.
But wait a minute. What falls are these? They don’t seem to resemble the Bridal Veil Falls that stand on the US side of the border. They do, however, look distinctly like the Horseshoe Falls, the immense curtain of water shrouded in mist that is the stock image of Niagara and lies almost entirely inside Canada. The annexation of a Canadian natural wonder was spotted by the news agency Associated Press.”This is an insult,” said Paul Gromosiak, an expert on the waterfalls. “This is not the US, this is 100% Canada, shot from the Canadian side.“
We have previously had our issues with the Guardian‘s coverage of Canada, but in this case we have little to add. Very little. Except: you don’t want to piss us off again.
That’s what Portraits of Americans are like.
This is what Portraits of Canadians are like.
via Bridlepath
Swords, baybee. We have swords. What do you have? A weak military force squandered in Iraq and a couple of dozen reserves out scouring the country side for escaped weasels. Tell them to look in Congress and the Senate.
raincoaster 
The first video on the post doesn’t seem to be available anymore, so I can’t make much of a comment… Though, the pony collector was quite hilarious. I particularly liked the male pony named Trucker. I’m sure the vinyl scent she was sniffing is just off-gassing…not good.
Anyhow, I did see on the news this thing about Niagara Falls. The Americans claim it’s a “joint” or “shared” natural treasure. Whatever.
Well a joint would be a shared natural resource, right enough. And ‘twould go a long way towards straightening the place out. But they seem curiously reluctant to share, man.
Besides, they always Bogart.
Which I think is the problem here: “Here’s looking AT you, America,” rather than the far-less-impressive “Here’s looking FROM you, America.”
“What do you have? A weak military force squandered in Iraq and a couple of dozen reserves out scouring the country side for escaped weasels. Tell them to look in Congress and the Senate.”
We’re trying to squeeze the weasels out and into Canada.
The “good relations” that once existed with our neighbours to the south have all but evaporated now. My advice to any American traveling to Canada is to be very cautious about shooting your mouth off here because one of us Canucks may be only to delighted to stuff one of your historical inaccuracies and/or escaped “weasels” into it.
Gulp. I have never heard a Canadian talk like that! Shame on you! Maybe you’re turning into us more than you know it…lol
Don’t make us come down there and kick your asses again! Is that why you want to seize the Great Horseshoe Falls? So you can put out the fire when we burn Washington again?
(You, personally, are in a concrete building, right? We need to know these things.)
“The “good relations” that once existed with our neighbours to the south have all but evaporated now. ”
Oh, I seriously doubt that. You need our specialized doctors, remember? From what I hear.
Oh yeah. And we need your cheap meds that we can buy online! Thank God for that! See, it all works out somehow.
BTW, PLEASE burn Washington! They’re voted ugliest people right behind Philly! Nobody will miss ’em!
[For purposes of survival I count myself as a Virginian]!