She Scores!

Not only is she PRETTY sure she saw Colin Freaking Firth down in Gastown today, but she got all her paid blogging done by 10am, she got invited on a Bobwheeling ride-along, AND she picked up all of the following for a grand total of less than $30:

  • DVD of Frankenstein’s Daughter starring Donald Murphy, Felix Locher, and Sandra Knight
  • DVD of The Bat starring Vincent Price and Agnes Moorehead who was the aunt of a friend of hers when she was little in Winnipeg
  • DVD of CARNIVAL OF FREAKIN’ SOULS, PEOPLE! Yes, let me repeat that, CARNIVAL OF SOULS, also known as Corridors of Evil.
  • DVD of The House on Haunted Hill starring, again, Vincent Price. I understand the actual house has been torn down, which is a bloody shame and just goes to show you LA has no sense of history.
  • DVD of The Ice Harvest, which I only bought because I’m a sucker for a John Cusack movie. Well, because I’m a sucker for a John Cusack movie and a caper film. Well, because I’m a sucker for a John Cusack movie and a caper film and a dark, twisted comedy.
  • When the hell did I switch to the first person, anyway? Being up in the daytime has COMPLETELY discombobulated me.
  • A lovely pink lacy cardigan that covers mah butt.
  • A lovely ombre baby blue cardigan that, again, covers mah butt.

UPDATE: I forgot to mention the beautiful blue/grey houndstooth hipster sombrero and the $80 wrestling boots I picked up at the DemiCouture sale at W2 on Sunday. But I DID! The wrestling boots are black Reeboks, which will wear out in no time but are cushy as the road to Hell in the meantime, and being black ankle boots make me feel like Batgirl every time I put them on. And the two of them together cost me $15. YES, you SHOULD hire me to do your shopping. 10% of gross and I’m yours.

And as I was rooting through the rather random assortment of DVDs there and passing up some awesome films like A History of Violence because it was $9.99 instead of $1.99 like the others and it’s Cronenberg and how many times can you watch that, really, even if you ARE a Viggofan? one of the Army Navy staffers walked by, uttered a squawk, and grabbed the Mamma Mia which I’d moved from in front of the much more interesting Van Helsingwhich isn’t actually an interesting movie unless you’re fascinated by the optical illusion of the cross-stitch on Kate Beckinsale’s bodice (are those nipples or are they…?) or by the sheer sexual magnetism of Hugh Jackman, which gosh, nobody we know would be, would she now?

Hugh Jackman is missing something

Hugh Jackman is missing something

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15 thoughts on “She Scores!

  1. Loved this bit, “…more interesting Van Helsing which isn’t actually an interesting movie unless you’re fascinated by the optical illusion of the cross-stitch on Kate Beckinsale’s bodice (are those nipples or are they…?)…”

  2. “10% of gross and I’m yours.”

    Sounds like your standards have gone up. It used to be you’d date anybody under the 60% gross mark.

    Guess I’m going to have to get myself grossified 11%, just to keep things cordial.

  3. I can’t possibbly take this blog seriously until I see the author in a bikini with Hugh Jackman. Does Hugh know that you want to cheat on him with Tony Blair?

  4. Mah Butt is a Canadian superhero, famous in certain circles for its magical mesmerizing power.

    Hugh will take what he can get, he’s an Aussie; he’s not proud.

  5. @Raincoaster:
    The tax writeoff is because by taking me off the market she finally put an end to the continual duelling between women wanting to marry me, reducing hospital costs and insurance claims.

    Be warned. Only one known picture of RC in bathing wear exists, and it’s kept in a lead box at the federal Prisons department.

    Being shown the picture has replaced the death penalty in this country. However, it’s controversial, coming as it does under the “cruel and unusual punishment” statutes.

  6. Metro: I see you’ve hired a PR to ghost-comment for you. She’s doing an admirable job. You should buy her the soft food instead of kibble this week.

    Archie, if he got that close to me I’d make SURE he went down under, trust me.

    Beadden, take a number.

  7. @rain–
    When was the last time you saw Mah Butt? Do you ever talk to or compliment Mah Butt? Or do you just smack Mah Butt around? Since Mah Butt’s not here, we prolly shouldn’t be talking about Mah Butt.

    etc., etc., etc.

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