turning porn into art: Fleshtones YouTube

I can’t say it any better than the copy on the site. It’s an art music video made by pixillating porn video footage and using an algorithm to convert the movements (and thus the changes in pixels) to music. This is possibly the most beautiful video I’ve seen on YouTube; the only thing even close is the Bleat and the Monkees “She Hangs Outpsychedelia.

In whcih pixelated pornography is turned into lyrical piano music…..

The concept of a correlation between sound and vision goes back to antiquity. One starry night on the island of Samos Pythagoras stood contemplating the skies, to him he very rhythm and motion of heavenly bodies in their orbits appeared to him as if governed by a cosmic harmony, a carefully choreographed sequence, the music of the spheres.

Renaissance artists such as Leonardo da Vinci produced sophisticated spectacles for court festivals that fused music and colour. In 1760 Father Castel constructed an Ocular Harpsichord or as he described it a ” harpsichord for the eyes”. Castel‘s machine was a normal harpsichord above which were 60 small windows, each with different coloured-glass and a small curtain. Each time the player depressed a particular key, the relevant curtain would rise to show a burst of colour.

In the next two hundred years many new instruments for combining light and sound were built. The British painter A. Wallace Rimington developed a Colour Organ which provided a moving light accompaniment to the 1916 New York premiere of Scriabin’s symphony Prometheus: A Poem of Fire. Scriabin had scored not only the music but also the precise colours he wanted to accompany particular passages.

Such colour music forms the conceptual starting point for Fleshtones, a piece for extreme pixelated porn and auto generated accompaniment. Footage from webcams and other online sites is broken down into a simple tableau of colour bands, at times rather like the paint charts one might find in a DIY store. Given the subject matter this palette is either predominately pink or coffee coloured thus producing a sequence of flickering fleshtones. Using the wonders of max/msp/jitter these Fleshtones are turned into lyrical piano music that rises in falls in response and exact correspondence to the onscreen movement. The motion of earthly bodies thus is transformed into something of beauty, harmony and contemplation.

the phallic logo awards

I was trying to class up the blog for the newbies, but let’s face it: I just have a dirty mind.

That’s why I’m posting about the Phallic Logo Awards, from B3TA, whatever that means. No, I KNOW what “phallic” means; it’s the TLA with a silent 3 I don’t understand. But then, it’s the Internet; you’re not supposed to understand it!

The game designers across the nation are playing is; can they design a logo and get it approved without the client realising it’s a big spurting penis?

We asked our readers to send in the best cock logos from around the world for our team of experts to evaluate. Now we present to you the very cream of the cocks.

Czech sausage ad. No, I'm not kidding. It's a Czech sausage ad. For reals.

Who: Czech sausage company
Pros: Great 1920s transvestite oral sex action.
Cons: Two meat. No veg.
Cock mark: 46%…

And so on…do not omit scrolling right to the bottom, for the Exxtra Bonus Muff Diver Award.

Who: Pride in Oldham award scheme
Pros: Tiny, tiny dwarf man going down on a lady in a peephole bikini.
Cons: He’s starting with her bellybutton.

No, seriously, you gotta see this!

lost and found: the Scream!

Munch's The Scream

Munch ado about something: Edvard Munch’s The Scream, one of the most popular paintings of the 19th Century, has been recaptured from its kidnappers relatively unharmed, along with The Madonna, another Muncherpiece. The Guardian has the full report:

“The pictures came into our hands this afternoon after a successful police action,” said Iver Stensrud, head of the police investigation.

There had been a £163,000 reward for the recovery of the paintings, which were both completed in 1891 and are now owned by the city of Oslo. Mr Stensrud said no reward had been paid.

He refused to discuss the methods or details of the search and said it was not possible for the news media, or the public, to see the paintings immediately.

“All that remains is an expert examination to confirm with 100% certainty, that these are the original paintings. We believe these are the originals,” Mr Stensrud said. “I saw the paintings myself today, and there [was] far from the damage that could have been feared.” …

The court did not identify the armed men who entered the museum and threatened employees with their weapons. However, Judge Arne Lyng sentenced Petter Tharaldsen, 34, to eight years in prison, Bjoern Hoen, 37, to seven, and Petter Rosenvinge, 38, to four years for their part in the robbery…

The Scream, depicting a tortured soul, is arguably Norway‘s greatest cultural treasure. It is widely recognised around the world and enjoys cult status with students. A chain of pubs in the UK which is popular with students uses the image on the signs hanging outside its premises.

cartoon o’ the day: blogdogs

Blog Dogs. On the internet, nobody knows you're a dog, particularly if you use Photoshop on your profile pic

quote o’ the day: Oscar Wilde on blogging

V“Man is least himself when he talks in his own person. Give him a mask, and he will tell you the truth.”

— Oscar Wilde