Category Archives: Movies

Top 46 Differences if Tarantino directed Star Wars

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Geek! Geek! Geek!Normally I'm with Tom Lehrer, who insisted that the reason most folk songs are so atrocious is that they were written by the people.

Every eighteen or twenty years or so, however, something fan-generated comes along and actually justifies the pixels that died to give it life.

Like this.

Top 46 Differences if Tarantino directed Star Wars

46. Stormtroopers are spray-painted so they aren't all "Mr. White"
by Timberline_Ridge

45. Darth Vader dances around as he tortures Han Solo to the song "Stuck In The Middle With You." Then he looks at the guard and says "Bring in the gimp."
by AshFalling

44. Mace Windu with a 'fro.
by Keith

43. Releasing the episodes in the order of 6,3,2,4,5, and finaly 1 just so people wont notice how uninteresting the entire hexilogy is.
by Bildo Baggens

42. John Williams score replaced by surf music.
by Peregrin Toker

41. Everyone dies. EVERYONE.
by Greedo

Save Adam Sandler!

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The Fuggers have done it again. Leaving alone Kate's horrific tit job stretch marks (nobody should have stretch marks there) they have gone straight for the freeze-dried jugular. I can hardly wait till their standards are lowered enough to cover Ann Coulter.

Kate 'n Adam

Adam: Dude, this chick is craaaaaazy.

Kate: Do you think her hair is prettier than mine?

Adam: I think she is from hell.

Kate: That outfit makes her knees look bloated. THAT is why the only liquid I eat is lemon juice.

Adam: You scare me.

Kate: I'm famished. Got any Tic-Tacs?

Adam: I have no idea why I am here.

Kate: Or, God, I'm so hungry I could even be really decadent and have a sugar-free Life-Saver.

Adam: I'm sure I could rustle up a cracker.

Kate: What? What kind of shit is that? A CRACKER? I'm supposed to eat starches now?

Adam: Seriously, I have no idea what I'm doing here.

Kate: What are you trying to do, fatten me up on the eve of my big movie release? BOLLOCKS TO YOU.

Adam: The rapping genie girl is starting to look better and better to me.

Plan 9 From Outer Space, colourized!!!

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Definitely worth three "!'s".

 

Memo of the Week: Team America, NC-17 or NSFW?

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Here is a snippet from the memo Matt Stone sent the MPAA censors regarding the breakthrough cinematic work Team America, World Police South Park: The Movie. I am sure they were as delighted to receive it as Stone was to send it.

Not!

Stone Memo

Via Boingboing and The Hot Blog. God, wouldn't it be lovely to make any movie you wanted and then send memos like that to professional prunes? Almost worth putting up with Hollywood.

Gilligan’s Planet

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Mashup of Gilligan’s Island and Star Wars. It’s a natural!