Two more in the series of Why I Don’t Swim in the Ocean. I would, if I could convince a pair of divers to swim below me at all times. Watch these videos and you’ll see why.
The Octopus
and
The Mantis Shrimp, ancestor to all clowns. Have a good time trying to sleep tonight.
Enjoy your next swim!
h/t Griffin Boyce
that’s all CGI
You know what the cushiest job in the world is? The cushiest job in the world is the Vancouver television weather presenter. You put on a Gore-tex jacket, stand in front of a green screen and intone, “Partly overcast, with chance of precipitation.” One take and you’re done. The wizards in IT swap in a different background every day, but until it actually snows, and you have to do another take wearing polar fleece, you’re done for the year.
By way of contrast, you know who’s the hardest-working personality in the weather video world?
FRANKIEEEE MACDONALD from SYDNEY NOVA SCOTIA!!!
Here he is in July 3rd video predicting today’s shitstorm in New Brunswick. You can’t say that man doesn’t put his heart into it and cover all the bases. Repeatedly. With Chinese Food and Coke. And Chinese Food and Coke. And Pepsi.
And for bonus points, check out how swiftly the commenters see off the haters. Truly, if YouTube comments having you doubting for the future of the human race, read some of the comments on Frankie’s vids to have your faith restored.
Well, this should end well.
Flounce Bingo, the national game of the Internet
There are some people the internet will miss, and me as well. And then there are some who…well…
So, I’m an admin in a hacker group on Facebook. This is challenging enough with people who are real, rather than made-up personas, and who speak English rather than some garbled patois known only to troll forums, intelligible only to RealGirls and other similarly mentally-challenged persons or entities. But not everyone who is there is real, sane, fluent in English, or respectful of boundaries.
Since I am identifiably and undeniably female on Facebook, those persons feel that I must be the most welcoming, friendly, helpful, and empathic admin.
This is a mistake.
Here is one of them. Let’s mock him, shall we?
Via completely, utterly unsolicited private message on Facebook:
Am sorry for asking dude, but Did this Edward have a security Guards? If he not, I thinks I & my sister will have a lots of fun with him
- Monday
How would I know?
- Tuesday
Sorry, just because my sister ask bout him, BECUZE we want to visited him and made him do what we want , remove some bad peo
People form Google and Facebook and take down all they dam games 2!what does that have to do with whether or not Edward Snowden has bodyguards?
Well, just talk to him, Not hit him or not made him fear
That all, trust me, Even if he have guards that may not problems to usBut thank a lots man,Am sorry for asking but,but what should with GirlyBoy, it almost done, all I have to do now is wait for 3 or 5 days that all,
1- Talk a good talking with him, %70 2- give him what he want , %0 3-Rape him , %12 4-take down my Facebook , %2 5-Kill him , %-10000
One of these can be done with him
That is not my problem.
…But since you ask, I advise taking down your Facebook
Ok, I will give the victories to all the 2600 , is that ok?
Ok, I understand , bye
Well, gee. Glad I could help.
…aaaaand now for something completely different! Here is my latest discovery, Gin Wigmore, fresh out of Kiwilandia and sounding like a hairball coughed up by the raddled lungs of Janis Joplin on a helium binge.
No, wait. It sounds a LOT better than it reads, trust me. You will like this, and if you don’t, I want to know what’s wrong with you.
[Pre-Chorus:]
Everybody’s doing it so why the hell should I
Everybody’s doing it so why the hell should I
[Chorus:]
I’m a bad woman to keep
Make me mad, I’m not here to please
Paint me in a corner but my colour comes back
Once you go black, you never go back
I’m a black sheep
I’m a black sheep
[Verse 2:]
I wasn’t born a beauty queen but I’m okay with that
Maybe radio won’t mind if I sing a little flat
I wear my boots to bed, hang a cross up on the wall
To save me from a shallow grave that wants to take us all
[Pre-Chorus:]
Everybody’s doing it so why the hell should I
Everybody’s doing it so why the hell should I
[Chorus:]
I’m a bad woman to keep
Make me mad, I’m not here to please
Paint me in a corner but my colour comes back
Once you go black, you never go back
I’m a black sheep
I’m a black sheep
I’m a black sheep
I’m a black sheep
[Repeat Verse 1:]
I got lots of jealous lovers that all wish they had me back
Got a pistol for a mouth, my old mama gave me that
Making my own road out of gravel and some wine
And if I have to fall then it won’t be in your line
[Chorus:]
I’m a bad woman to keep
Make me mad, I’m not here to please
Paint me in a corner but my colour comes back
Once you go black, you never go back
[Outro:]
Once you go black, you never go back
Once you go black, you never go back
Once you go black, you never go back
Once you go black, you never go back
Spring Heeled Jack also apparently kitten heeled
Regulars here at the ol’ raincoaster blog will be familiar with our partiality for cryptids, Illuminatuses, and similiar phantoms of the night. They will also be familiar with our somewhat impractical, but extensive, erudition on the subject. Imagine our surprise, then, when we discovered a supernatural evil-doer with which we were unfamiliar!
Spring Heeled Jack.
Maybe it’s just that I find someone whose superpower is going BOING! into the sky not all that intimidating. Maybe that he never actually killed anybody. I mean, it’s all well and good to spit out blue phosphorescent flames, but at a certain point you gotta DO something with them, right? Ah well. Here is the gloriously-voiced Tom Slemen of Liverpool to tell you about Spring Heeled Jack and his friend’s mother…
raincoaster 