made by some guy named Alfred. And starring some guy named Grover. A moving cinematic exporation of the inherent futility of aspirationalism.
daylight reveals Downtown EastSide shock/horror!
Well, for some of us anyway.
It’s remarkable what you can get accomplished when:
- you wake up at 8am
- WordPress won’t let you post because of server issues
I found the paperwork the government required of me, straightened my living room (somewhat), recycled several large sacks of old newspapers and flyers, stopped by the Downtown EastSide Women’s Centre, read the Bad Date Sheet (I meant to swipe one to post on the blog; apparently some fat white 30-something is kidnapping and robbing hookers and dumping them in godforsaken Cloverdale several times a week; now that the news is out, all 300-pounder suburbanites can kiss their chances of a cheap BJ goodbye), swung by the Salty Tongue for a yummy sammich and my free (loyalty programs rule!) mocha, full-fat, damn the torpedos, filed my taxes, made it to the government office on time and got that out of the way smoothly, thanks to finally having found said paperwork, dropped the taxes off at the tax office, picked up my free facial mask at Lush (thanks to the goody bag at the Rare dinner), snagged a free kolachy from the Kolachy Shop, also due to goody bag at said Rare dinner, grabbed some veggies for dinner from Sunrise Market, and attempted to take a look at the new Costco in the hood, although I was turned back at the door, as apparently you cannot browse in Costco unless you’re a member. I tell you, I have no problem getting into the Vancouver Club or Shine, but ain’t nobody getting past the door bitch at Costco without their little token of membership.
Yep, without question this was the most productive day I’ve had in a very long time.
Hella boring for the blog, though.
Gene, Gene, the Dancing Machine
Are you old enough to remember the Gong Show? No? Are you old enough to remember drugs then? Or preschool? If so, this will make perfect sense.
I just thought we needed a raincoaster equivalent to the Unicorn Chaser, after the Michael Jackson eye-ripping soul-destroyer of a post below.
the king of pop and lord of the abyss
From Defamer comes pictoral evidence that Michael Jackson, the so-called King of Pop, is well on the way to Transition in the classic Innsmouthian mode, if not actually Arkhamian.
Eagle-eyed commenter Valet of the Dolls was the first to suggest the uncanny resemblance to legended and unspeakable aquatic hybrids. I think the connection is more sinister still.
It is the Thing on the Doorstep.
There are black zones of shadow close to our daily paths, and now and then some evil soul breaks a passage through. When that happens, the man who knows must strike before reckoning the consequences…The butler, tougher-fibred than I, did not faint at what met him in the hall in the morning. Instead, he telephoned the police. When they came I had been taken upstairs to bed, but the – other mass – lay where it had collapsed in the night. The men put handkerchiefs to their noses.
What they finally found inside Edward’s oddly-assorted clothes was mostly liquescent horror. There were bones, to – and a crushed-in skull.
Well yes, but he paid for that. And the nose is his own; he still has the receipt!
save the endangered tree octopus
From my earliest childhood to my brief spell as a humble Greenpeace canvasser, I have always been acutely sensitive to the plight of endangered species, and never moreso than now that I live in one of the last great rainforests of the world.
As we hurtle ever faster towards our inevitable sterile, Logan’s Run inspired future, we shed species at a rate of approximately one every 20 minutes. Please don’t let the untamed beauty that is the Pacific Tree Octopus be lost; do not let it go the way of the dodo and the snow leopard.
But together we can work to maintain the wild herds of this noble creature. Hunted nearly to extinction for its incomparable beauty, its fate need not be sealed; indeed, it is possible that, with adequate planning and habitat preservation, we could learn to coexist with this most iconic of Cascadian cephalofauna.
Save the Pacific Northwest Tree Octopus has the full story.
Show people that you support the cause of the Pacific Northwest Tree Octopus by placing a Tentacle Ribbon or badge, along with a link to this page, on your website or weblog so that they can learn more. Together, we have the power to build a grass-roots campaign to save the Tree Octopus!
Why It’s Endangered
Although the tree octopus is not officially listed on the Endangered Species List, we feel that it should be added since its numbers are at a critically low level for its breeding needs. The reasons for this dire situation include: decimation of habitat by logging and suburban encroachment; building of roads that cut off access to the water which it needs for spawning; predation by foreign species such as house cats; and booming populations of its natural predators, including the bald eagle and sasquatch. What few that make it to the Canal are further hampered in their reproduction by the growing problem of pollution from farming and residential run-off. Unless immediate action is taken to protect this species and its habitat, the Pacific Northwest tree octopus will be but a memory.
The possibility of Pacific Northwest tree octopus extinction is not an unwarranted fear. Other tree octopus species — including the Douglas octopus and the red-ringed madrona sucker — were once abundant throughout the Cascadia region, but have since gone extinct because of threats similar to those faced by paxarbolis, as well as overharvesting by the now-illegal tree octopus trade.
The history of the tree octopus trade is a sad one. Their voracious appetite for bird plumes having exhausted all the worthy species of that family, the fashionistas moved on to cephalopodic accoutrements during the early 20th Century. Tree octopuses became prized by the fashion industry as ornamental decorations for hats, leading greedy trappers to wipe out whole populations to feed the vanity of the fashionable rich. While fortunately this practice has been outlawed, its effects still reverberate today as these millinery deprivations brought tree octopus numbers below the critical point where even minor environmental change could cause disaster.
