Daily Archives: September 8, 2006

Steve Irwin news roundup

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TIAI think I’ve got it all, pretty much. Here are all the posts on this blog about Steve Irwin’s death. A warning to the curious: I am completely, utterly without sense of taste or discretion. Click at your peril.

Steve Irwin, R.I.P. Steve’s FedEx commercial. The news hits.

A Steve Irwin Tribute. Just what it says, something I wrote about my awestruck regard for the man.

No State Funeral for Steve Irwin. Australia offers, the Thumbs up from Steve!family declines. He was just a “regular bloke.” Yeah, but he was the best one.

Stingray apologizes for killing Steve Irwin. And about bloody time, too.

Steve Irwin wants you to watch THAT video. This is for real, or so this website says. Apparently he wanted his death to be broadcast, should it happen on-camera. No official word from the family yet, though.

Today in gruesomely decayed sea monster news. Russia has a sea monster, and here are the pix. Okay, it’s way tasteless of me to do it in Stevespeak, but this is the way Steve WOULD have reported it, if he weren’t dead.

UPDATE:

Would You Watch Steve Irwin Die? Apparently it’s true: Steve wanted his death filmed. But he didn’t actually SAY he wanted it broadcast, so what’s the right thing to do?

About the only thing he did NOT do in real life

today in gruesomely decayed sea monster news

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Well mate, it’s abaout bloody toime we had some Sea Monsteh news ‘raond these pahts. Woi’ve bin calamari-deficient feh fah too long.

Oi say we call this one “Sakhalin Sally.”

Ain't she a beauty? Crikey!

Ain’t she a beauty? That evah-reloiable fave-rit o’ soientific jehnalists everywheh, EnglishRussia.com has the repoht.

This creature was found by Russian soldiers on Sakhalin shoreline. Sakhalin area is situated near to Japan, it’s the most eastern part of Russia, almost 5000 miles to East from Moscow (Russia is huge). People don’t know who is it. According to the bones and teeth – it is not a fish. According to its skeleton – it’s not a crocodile or alligator. It has a skin with hair or fur. It has been said that it was taken by Russian special services for in-depth studies, and we are lucky that people who encountered it first made those photos before it was brought away.

Crikey! She's hyoooooooooooge!

Crikey, she’s a big one, eh? She’d hah bin byoodeeful swimmin’ in the woild. But if ye’d be lookin’ at heh teeth an’ saying te yesself, “It looks loike a hohse’s skull upsoide-daown” we’d be thinkin’ the exact saime thing, mate.

But an owld one, roit?

But thet doesn’t accaont feh heh taiol, do it?

See whot Oi moine?

Whot a pity we nevah got ta see this gehl in the woild, swimmin’ free. Aw man, Oi think Oi’m gonna go ave a croi naow.

prank o’ the day: VF punks TWS

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from Vanity Fair via Gawker. But yes, they really SHOULD do the New Yorker (and some Canuckistan terrorist such as myself really SHOULD do The Walrus…hmmmmm).

In any case, the skanky demi-coverwrap innovation, paired with the chubby, self-satisfied, Winnebago-driving Rotarian-pandering-to, blowhardy Weekly Standard makes this the perfect target.

For the National Lampoon. Vanity Fair, how did it come to this?

Still. Funnee.

A Vanities Cover-Flap Public Service

By ANDREW HEARST

Magazine publishers often send their newsstand editions into the world with “cover flaps” that tease the contents within. This is a handy way to pique the interest of passersby. But a cover flap can also be useful as an agent of mischief and lighthearted political agitation. Inside the October 2006 issue of Vanity Fair is a fake flap you can attach to a copy of The Weekly Standard. Simply get your hands on a copy of our October issue, turn to page 272, and follow the instructions below:

1. Cut and fold where indicated.

2. Hurry to a newsstand. Pick up the latest issue of The Weekly Standard. Wrap folded page around spine of magazine.

3. Return magazine to rack.

4. Step back a few paces and observe.

VF's TWS cover flap in prank flap

Paris Hilton’s drunk driving video

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but in all likelihood all video of Paris Hilton driving falls under that heading.

from Defamer

Paris Hilton‘s character in Bottoms Up looses [sic] control of a studio-owned golf cart. Bottoms Up on DVD 9/12!

lonelygirl15 is the new JT LeRoy/James Frey/Kaavya Viswanathan

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 lonelygirl15from the New York Times via Gawker.JT LeRoy, another imaginary person

<— lonelygirl15 became a bit of a thang on the Internets recently for her cool, articulate, and moving video blogs about teen angst, hope, fear, and honesty.

Too bad she’s fake.James Frey, a million little whoppers

Honestly, “the lighting is better than most vlogs” is all the critics could come up with before this mea culpa. Did not one person notice that her makeup was professionally done as well? Very few 15-year-olds are that good with the cover stick. This is an historic day in Fake Artistedom.

Isn’t it some kind of felony to impersonate a teenager online? KV, can't be bothered to look up the spelling. After all, who needs to know who she is anymore?I thought the FBI had agents on that…

A Message From The Creators

To Our Incredible Fans,

Thank you so much for enjoying our show so far. We are amazed by the overwhelmingly positive response to our videos; it has exceeded our wildest expectations. With your help we believe we are witnessing the birth of a new art form. Our intention from the outset has been to tell a story– A story that could only be told using the medium of video blogs and the distribution power of the internet. A story that is interactive and constantly evolving with the audience.

Right now, the biggest mystery of Lonelygirl15 is “who is she?” We think this is an oversimplification. Lonelygirl15 is a reflection of everyone. She is no more real or fictitious than the portions of our personalities that we choose to show (or hide) when we interact with the people around us. Regardless, there are deeper mysteries buried within the plot, dialogue, and background of the Lonelygirl15 videos, and many of our tireless and dedicated fans have unearthed some of these. There are many more to come.

To enhance the community experience of Lonelygirl15, which you have already helped to create, we are in the process of building a website centered around video and interactivity. This website will allow everyone to enjoy the full potential of this new medium. Unfortunately, we aren’t programmers. We are filmmakers. We are working furiously to complete the website, and hope to have it up and running shortly.

So, sit tight. You are the only reason for our success, and we appreciate your devotion. We want you to know that we aren’t a big corporation. We are just like you. A few people who love good stories. We hope that you will join us in the continuing story of Lonelygirl15, and help us usher in an era of interactive storytelling where the line between “fan” and “star” has been removed, and dedicated fans like yourselves are paid for their efforts. This is an incredible time for the creator inside all of us.

Thank you.

Yes, and it’s an even more incredible time for the bullshit detector inside all of us.