post o’ the day: Samaha on Muslim veils

You find the most interesting things when you check out people who comment on your blog. Things like this:

I could choose to let this veil be my identity.  However, our Muslim brothers and sisters have turned our Islam into a religion of inequality, suppression and injustice, so I can not for any other reason than to please you Allah wear this veil.  They have taken the rights you have given me and told me that this is not what you meant.  They taken from me basic human needs and told me that this is not what Allah has intended for me.

Oh, Allah, if they could they would steal the heaven that you have layed beneath my feet…

Read the rest here.

James Bond, where are you when we need you?

Miss Tibet, 2005And don’t tell me he’s here. Daniel Craig may be a fine actor and a decorative one at that, but he’s just no James Bond.

But, in that, he’s set the standard for spies around the world today. Not only do the Americans have problems with their middle-management selling them out for a powerboat and a two-bedroom condo in South America, but apparently India‘s spies are not exactly equipped with nerves of steel. Nerves of spun glass perhaps. Got this via Fark.

Miss Tibet and Miss China, 2002. You won't be seeing this tableau again soonEVERY beauty pageant comes with its requisite dose of melodrama: temper tantrums, lost tiaras and controversial disqualifications.

But this year’s Miss Tibet contest took the customary histrionics to new heights when it opened yesterday in Dharamsala, the Indian town where the Dalai Lama has lived since fleeing his homeland.

On the eve of the competition, one entrant was ordered to withdraw because she serves in a covert Tibetan unit of the Indian Army specialising in high-altitude combat. Pema Choedon, the soldier turned beauty queen, was so upset that she had a panic attack and was taken to hospital.

That’s some combat specialist! I bet Sandra Bullock could kick her ass!

Miss Congeniality, being uncongenial

In ass-kicking news, the one Tibetan who could give Bond a run for his money in the Cool department says he wants a shot at the crown as well.the swimsuit competition. Believe me, nobody's too eager for him to get this idea anytime soon

When the first contest was held, the government-in-exile’s prime minister denounced it as “un-Tibetan” and “aping Western culture”.

The Dalai Lama has since softened the official line.

If there is Miss Tibet, why not Mr Tibet?

Canada vs pot

 hey, like, go fight 'em, eh!

I know! You don’t see a headline like that every day, eh?

It seems that, like many another battle-scarred force before them, the Taliban has begun to take refuge in marijuana.

Canadian troops fighting Taliban militants in Afghanistan have stumbled across an unexpected and potent enemy — almost impenetrable forests of 10-feet (three metre) high marijuana plants.

General Rick Hillier, chief of the Canadian defence staff, said on Thursday that Taliban fighters were using the forests as cover. In response, the crew of at least one armored car had camouflaged their vehicle with marijuana.

It’s called the Mystery Machine, and they just forgot to run it through the car wash after investigating the haunted commune near Nelson, okay?

Actually, I’m just loving the idea that the Canadian DND purchasing department may soon be placing bale orders for the stuff to camouflage the armored vehicles. Who needs depleted uranium and kevlar when your APC is wrapped in a thick layer of BC Bud and Kandahar Candu, eh?

And, no doubt, a dense cloud of smoke.

“We tried burning them with white phosphorous — it didn’t work. We tried burning them with diesel — it didn’t work. The plants are so full of water right now … that we simply couldn’t burn them,” he said.

Even successful incineration had its drawbacks.

“A couple of brown plants on the edges of some of those (forests) did catch on fire. But a section of soldiers that was downwind from that had some ill effects and decided that was probably not the right course of action,” Hiller said dryly.

One soldier told him later: “Sir, three years ago before I joined the army, I never thought I’d say ‘That damn marijuana’.”

celebrating Black Friday the 13th: festive foods

seriously. 

crying kittyI remember when Kurt left.

I remember when Graydon left.

I remember when Tina left.

The Tatler, that is. After that I didn’t pay too much attention.

I will always remember Black Friday the 13ththe day Jessica left.

so it's not a keyboard. It's as close as I could get, okay? Lay the fuck off!

But for those of you who don’t want to remember, there are these.

seriously, that is one sad pussy, dude

Came across a link to this yesterday on BoingBoing (or, god, was it Gawker? Can’t remember. How mortifying; oh well, they’re both right handy in the blogroll over there, help yourself) and didn’t have a use for it then, but now it seems only too perfect. Print these out and take them grocery shopping this weekend, because you’re going to need them come Monday and your first Jessica-free edition of Gawker.

WTF? Seriously dude, WTF?

The Ambien Cookbook, from the New Yorker.

The sleeping pill Ambien seems to unlock a primitive desire to eat in some patients, according to emerging medical case studies that describe how the drug’s users sometimes sleepwalk into their kitchens, claw through their refrigerators like animals and consume calories ranging into the thousands.
The Times.

kitten overdose. Obviously another fan

Sorpresa con Queso
Ingredients:
7 bags Cheetos-brand cheese snacks
17 to 19 glasses tap water
5 mg. Ambien
Place Cheetos bags in cupboard.

Take Ambien, fall asleep.

Wait 2-3 hours, then sleepwalk to kitchen, tear cupboard doors off hinges in search of Cheetos.

Find Cheetos, eat contents of all 7 bags.

Fall back asleep on kitchen floor.

When awakened by early-morning sunlight, get up and say, “What the—?”

Wipe orange Cheetos dust from fingers, face, and hair.

Drink 17 to 19 glasses of water from kitchen tap.

Return to bed

a very sad kitty

Icebox Mélange
Ingredients:
Entire contents of refrigerator
1 Diet Snapple
5 mg. Ambien
Take Ambien, fall asleep.

Wait 2-3 hours, then sleepwalk to kitchen.

Devour everything in refrigerator (including all fancy mustards and jellies, iffy takeout leftovers, and plastic dial from thermostat).

Belch loud enough to wake wife or girlfriend. When she enters kitchen, bellow, “Can’t you see I’m working here?”

Fall asleep on kitchen floor.

After 4-5 more hours, wake up on subway, fully dressed from the waist up, drinking a Diet Snapple.

beerkittyand so on

That should adequately prevent your dying of malnutrition while in a pharmaceutical-induced blackout.

And always remember, beer has simply tons of calories!

Ladies and gentlemen, a moment of silence, please, while we stand and give Jessica Coen our traditional Canuckistan departure salute, with appropriate ruffles and flourishes:

Canuckistan seal pup salute

Amish-killer’s family speaks

 Amish buggy

A little background, for those of you who may not have been following the story:

On October 2 of this year, Charles Carl Roberts IV stormed an Amish schoolhouse in West Nickel Mines, Pennsylvania, forced the boys out and took 10 girls hostage. Police believe he intended to molest them and possibly torture them as well (according to the Trenchcoat Chronicles), but was prevented by the prompt arrival of the police. Roberts is believed to have been motivated by a long-simmering resentment against healthy girl children, stemming from the death of his own daughter as a newborn. He also claimed in multiple suicide notes that he felt crushing guilt for having molested family members decades ago, although nothing has turned up to substantiate that particular claim.

At one point, an Amish man said he learned, Roberts ordered the girls to do something and the older girls told the younger ones in Pennsylvania Dutch: “Duh ’s net! Duh ’s net!” (“Don’t do it! Don’t do it!”)

There was fear in the schoolhouse, but also a protectiveness, with the older girls looking out for the little ones, said the Amish man, who asked not to be named.

But there was something else going on in the schoolhouse that day, too, he said.

The same fate, the same higher power, was at that site that was at Flight 93,” the Amish man said, referring to the plane that went down in Shanksville on Sept. 11. “That same power was at Columbine, too.”

Roberts shot all 10 girls before killing himself. Five of the girls died almost immediately, five others were seriously wounded. 

Amish girlsOver a million dollars has been raised to help the families of the children involved, and the hospitals who treated the wounded and dying have waived their fees, although for many of the families there will be ongoing medical expenses that will continue to be a burden. Part of the money has already paid to have the schoolhouse razed to the ground (Thursday); it will be replaced by a new building, in a different location, and the site will be turned back into pasture.

As reported at the time, the Amish community requested that the public forgive the shooter and support his widow and children as victims of this same tragedy. While Roberts‘ grave has been vandalized, there have been no reports of reprisals against his family, and the Amish have set aside a portion of the donations to assist the Roberts family.

This is their statement, via Trenchcoat Chronicles:

From the Roberts family:

To our Amish friends, neighbors, and local community:Our family wants each of you to know that we are overwhelmed by the forgiveness, grace, and mercy that you’ve extended to us. Your love for our family has helped to provide the healing we so desperately need. The prayers, flowers, cards, and gifts you’ve given have touched our hearts in a way no words can describe. Your compassion has reached beyond our family, beyond our community, and is changing our world, and for this we sincerely thank you.

Please know that our hearts have been broken by all that has happened. We are filled with sorrow for all of our Amish neighbors whom we have loved and continue to love. We know that there are many hard days ahead for all the families who lost loved ones, and so we will continue to put our hope and trust in God of all comfort, as we all seek to rebuild our lives.