Sunday sermon at the Esoteric Order of Dagon

Cthulhu is the way, the despair and the darkness

I’m assuming you know the original source of which this is an obscene and unspeakable (and Constitutionally-protected) mockery, right? He’s getting quite litigious these days, so I’m not going to link to him, nor to the source from whence I obtained this accursed and unmentionable document. Click to view full-size and read, gasping, while the blood freezes in your veins and the very stars stand still to watch in awe-struck horror.

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18 thoughts on “Sunday sermon at the Esoteric Order of Dagon

  1. I used to collect the more ‘Christian’ (and I use that term loosely) versions of these for my own personal entertainment and window into a man’s insanity when I was in grad school, because you couldn’t pass a pay phone or public restroom where there wasn’t at least 5 or 10 of them stacked.

  2. I don’t think I’ve ever seen one in the real world.

    Mouser: thanks so much for your enlightened commentary. What, indeed, would the blogosphere do without feedback such as yours?

    How’s My Blogging: Call 1-800-STFU-LOL.

  3. Hey – this is the famous Cthulhu Chick Tract!! Wow – where did you find it? I’ve been looking for it for ages. The guy who wrote it got a C&D and took it off his site…

    Er… and how come I didn’t see it when I looked at your site the other day?

  4. Because I hadn’t posted it yet? And yes, it is, but we don’t say that in the blog post, lest Google and Chick’s lawyers find it.

    There are quite a few copies out there in the Cthulhusphere, actually. I have two different copies from two completely different sources, so if I get a C&D I will always have a spare anyway.

  5. Jack A. Chick should have received a C&D from Saint Paul ere now for his perversions of the Bible.

    We had a Private citizen on the base for a while who dropped those things around the washrooms. The one I’ll always remember was the one that said that “IHS” on the Catholic host stood for “Isis, Horus, and Set” of the Egyptian pantheon.

    What possible response is there to that sort of stupidity except to mock and deride it at every opportunity? Chick deserves thorough kicking wherever his foamy-mouthed missives are found.

    I wonder if he’d be amenable to Jack Chick toilet paper? For a price, I mean (But a cheap one).

    (In case you were wondering: IHS stands for Iesus Hominem Salvatorem or “Jesus, Saviour of Mankind”–in Latin, a language of which Jack Chick is as ignorant as he is of basic history, theology, iconography and art.)

  6. Jack Chick tp? I can totally see a market for that; Dawn Steele got her start printing Gucci toilet paper, and she ended up running Hollywood. No telling where Metro will end up: just don’t forget the little people.

    IHS totally stands for Issaqa, Hypnos, Shub Niggurath. But I suppose you have to say Shub N-wordurath nowadays.

  7. She did; it’s a very sad story, but it’s a really GOOD story, too. An epic life. I’ve got a book at home of women who became powers in corporate Hollywood, and it opens with her funeral and works backwards from there….have to find the name of it, it was really good.

    Sherry Lansing is an amazing woman also; if you have a chance to see her speak, go.

  8. I was printing up some save-the-planet-from-global-warming tip sheets for church on Sunday (Unitarian Universalist) when I looked at my bulletin board, where I had posted out copy of this tract. Since it was April Fools Day, I decided to slip a few (seven) in with them.

    I don’t think anyone noticed, but you never really know with these people–my people. We could all see a new addition to the hymnal next year for all I know. . . .

    In case they ask, has anyone set “Ph’nglui mgw’nafh” to music?

  9. Actually, google “Shoggoth on the roof” and you’ll find a whole HPL musical. I’m relatively sure that’s got to be in there somewhere. Sweet prank.

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