Indiana Jones and the Call of Cthulhu: complete text
23 Jun 2007 24 Comments
in Allegory, Blogroll, Books, Celebrity, Cthulhu, Entertainment, Fans, Fantasy, Generation X, Harrison Ford, Historical, Indiana Jones, Literary, Movies, Science Fiction, Squid, Supernatural, U.S., Weird, geek, horror, mashups, media, sad
What do you people think? Is he going after Cthulhu this time?
It’s just too bloody perfect, you know. The protagonist in The Call of Cthulhu was an aging archaeologist with a reputation for doing things his own way. With his trusty buddy, Inspector Legrasse, he crosses the globe, attempting to puzzle out the mysterious connection between a precious religious artifact, a cannibalistic cult of Louisiana swamp dwellers, and a vicious tribe of Greenland Esquimaux.
Blowing away forever all pretence to cool I may once have possessed, I have re-edited Howard Phillips Lovecraft‘s immortal Gothic tale The Call of Cthulhu, and placed at its heart a certain Midwestern academic who is, himself, no stranger to the strange.
Right-click, Save As:
Indiana Jones and the Call of Cthulhu: complete text by raincoaster
Also: Indy in a hat. Still hawt?
:: 
:: 
:: 
:: 
:: 
:: 
:: 
:: 
:: 
:: 
Jun 23, 2007 @ 08:32:07
Heh, heh. Plant seed. Await fruition!
STB
Jun 23, 2007 @ 08:37:07
Exactly. But I’ve been thinking about this for a good ten hours, since I saw it on Defamer.
Jun 23, 2007 @ 08:43:03
Ten tentacles? Ten hours?
Naughty, RC! You’re a very bad girl!
STB
Jun 23, 2007 @ 08:45:40
Hey, that’s how high I can count. What can I say?
Jun 23, 2007 @ 08:49:41
No mean feet!?
STB
Jun 23, 2007 @ 08:55:52
Tentacles and pseudopods. No feet.
Hey, do you think I could get disability?
Jun 23, 2007 @ 09:24:18
Tentacles sure could make that wheelchair fly.
STB
Jun 23, 2007 @ 14:36:42
Alas, the Inspector was never given cause to visit ancient Fremantle in Western Australia. He may have stumbled across the strange library I mentioned in fragment of a life which I wrote shortly before my unexplained death on the Swan River.
Jun 23, 2007 @ 14:37:54
PS – that was a brilliant bit of work – have you been hired as the scriptwriter yet?
Jun 23, 2007 @ 21:21:13
I didn’t actually write it. I used Search and Replace to sub in Indy, and I tweaked it so he vanished, not died. That’s about it, really.
Gee, sure would be nice if someone submitted this to Stumbleupon…
Jun 24, 2007 @ 10:39:02
It’d be great if he was going after Cthulhu but Hollywood is nowhere near that hip.
Jun 24, 2007 @ 10:46:28
Hey, I got the idea from Defamer; everyone there except me seems to work in Hollywood…and Lovecraft’s been adapted to film before. Never well, except In the Mouth of Madness, but that had the benefit of having Sam Neill in it, which always helps a film.
Jun 24, 2007 @ 19:42:37
The squid-faced monster depicted puts me in mind of the kracken/Davy Jones in the 2nd Pirates movie. You wouldn’t want similar monsters for these profitable franchises, but the story-line is a great idea.
Jun 25, 2007 @ 00:21:31
Davy Jones was a total Cthluhu ripoff. They’re well aware that Lovecraft’s literary estate is not going to sue them. Cthluhu is a rather popular monster, in the world of monsters, that is. Not as well known as vampires, but then he was made up completely less than a hundred years ago.
Jun 25, 2007 @ 19:42:07
Blowing away forever all pretence to cool I may once have possessed
I’d have to agree. Sorry ;)
Jun 25, 2007 @ 19:43:22
stumbled it anyway
Jun 25, 2007 @ 20:58:15
Thank you. What care I for dignity when I can have immortal fame?
Jun 25, 2007 @ 21:05:02
yes, well, that’s what i expect from you
Jun 25, 2007 @ 21:25:47
We deliver according to specs.
Oct 08, 2007 @ 13:18:44
I’ve always thought Indy strangely attractive.
Oct 08, 2007 @ 18:13:35
That’s not so strange.
Sep 27, 2009 @ 16:39:53
I see quite a few people reading this post. Why don’t I hear any of them calling me, offering me big bucks for the script???? EH???