If they wanted us to be truly happy, wouldn’t it be OUR day instead of this Valendude’s? Think about it.

Just because I’m paranoid doesn’t mean it’s NOT a conspiracy.

The Stormtrooper of Love

Not sure what to get That Special Someone on This Special Day? If he’s anything like this guy, I recommend the newly-released Kalashnikov 5. Yes, that’s right: they released the newest AK-47 just in time for Valentine’s Day. How thoughtful of them.

As for me, well, is there any question what I want? And I didn’t get it for Christmas, either.

They simply flock to him