Borislandia Rising!

BoJo, evil supremacist mastermind or mild mannered toff?Sources reveal that notoriously ambitious, admittedly ruthless international man of mystery recovering journalist Boris Johnson is behind a plot to raise a high-tech man-made island in the middle of the Thames. Whatever his claims that it’s a solution to the Heathrow runway controversy, Borislandia,” as it has been dubbed, is clearly nothing more than the Blond Bombshell‘s answer to your common or garden bad guy’s island lair.

Personal Ephemera has revealed, for the first time, the secret flag and crest of Borislandia, no doubt soon to become familiar to all of us as it flies over progressively more and more of the world, radiating outward from Borislandia, Islington, and his headquarters in the (infamously size queeny and very Bond Villain/Smarter Imagey) Glass Testicle. Note that when the crest is displayed alone the supporters are an overworked PA on the right and an intimidatingly-groomed PR on the left.

Behold. See it here now, see it on your own block later. First they take Mayfair, then they take Berlin!

Borislandia

6 thoughts on “Borislandia Rising!

  1. Apparently the fault lies not with the weather, but with the nomenclature. The Underground, the Times reports, is only 45% underground, and the two lines that kept running were the only two entirely underground.

    Now, the buses? No excuse. They claim using snowplows would have simply “moved masses of snow, and where would we put them?” Somehow Winterpeg has no difficulty with this, you’d think London could figure it out: where all the parked cars that aren’t there because nobody drove today would have been parked, duh.

  2. A lot of NY’s subway is above ground in the outer buroughs — the “el” or elevated trains — and they keep going. In the winter of ’95-’96, when we had 3 blizzards and about 100″ of snow in just a few weeks, the plowed snow was a problem. Mayor Rudy decided it should be hauled and dumped into the rivers. It worked.

    I understand they don’t have many plows in London, but I don’t understand why they think dumping tons of salt on a couple inches of unplowed snow is going to be effective.

    But who am I to criticize? I learned to drive in snow in Washington, DC which means I panicked at the first hint of flurries. I nearly hyperventilated, actually.

  3. Boris cycled in to work. Either Islington isn’t that far from City Hall or he’s not as bright as advertised. What the hell’s wrong with a nice walk in a gentle snowfall? Kids today, harumph!

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