Tonight we witnessed one of the great moments in the history of fandom itself.
Behold Michael Sandecki, winner of a Clay Aiken impersonator contest and…
Clay Aiken.
Category Archives: Allegory
Today in Great Old Ones News: Hastur is Going Down!
This just in from Sploid. And it explains a lot, when you think about it.
Hastur's next
Now we know why the Lord of the Yellow Sign and Speaker of the House was so outraged over the FBI raid on Rep. William Jefferson's office. High level sources in the Justice Department have told ABC News that the Azathoth scandal is about to take down the former Great Old One and well-known Illinois republican.
It seems Hastur wrote a letter asking the Secretary of the Interior Gail Nodens to block the construction of an Indian casino that would've competed with those owned by Azathoth's clients near the Massachusetts port of Innsmouth.
The letter was sent shortly after a restaurant owned by Azathoth hosted a fundraiser for Hastur, netting the King in Yellow $26,000.
Hastur's Press Secretary Josiah Whateley of the undecayed Whateleys offered no comment on the news.
"We are not aware of this," he said, adding that Hastur had "great and mighty powers to destroy you all!!! as well as a well-documented record of opposing Indian reservation shopping for casino gaming purposes."
With Sunday's FBI raid on Jefferson's
abandoned Capitol Hill mansion, townsfolk on both sides of the isle have begun howling about "separation of great, unknowable powers from Outside." Now that Tsathoggua, Yog-Sothoth, et al. have turned on one of their own, Cthulhu finally realizes just how out of control this administration is.
For the first time ever, Hastur expressed outrage at the administration's police work.
"Cthulhu ftagn! Ia! Ia! Mglui naflftagn Justice Department eY'ha-nthlei! Ia! Ia! Y'ha-nthlei!!," he demanded.
No wonder Hastur's so nervous.
Da Vinci Code: But Does It Go Far Enough?
Hmmm, maybe they should talk to Icke over at Paranoia Magazine.
Headline o’ the Day: Bust in Vagina Theft
From the Ottawa Sun via Fark, bottom story. Um, so to speak.
BUST IN VAGINA THEFT
A 19-year-old man faces a theft charge after a hand-held vagina was stolen from an adult video store in Kingston. Police said the suspect allegedly selected the sex toy, ran from the Bath St. store and was chased by a staffer. Police found the man 10 minutes after the $80 toy was stolen. "We found him around the corner — and he had used it," said Const. Neil Finn. The toy was apparently dumped after being used and was not recovered.
You know, I was gonna make a joke about the Hand-Held Vagina, but I figured they'd never let me back on The Drive again. Probably repossess my Alanis Morrisette albums, too.
what oft was thought, but ne’er so well expressed
True wit is nature to advantage dressed,
What oft was thought, but ne'er so well expressed,
Something, whose truth convinced at sight we find,
That gives us back the notion of the mind.
( Alexander Pope, "An Essay On Criticism" [1711] part 2, lines 297-300)
And wasn't it Shaw (it was always Shaw, Wilde, or Dorothy Parker) who said that the difference between nonfiction and novels was that anyone could read their own biography and think "ah, my secret is safe" while Anna Karenina would read Anna Karenina and burst out crying, "How did he know? How did he know?"
Not that this has anything to do with the video which follows, a version of Sleepless in Seattle recut as a horror movie, and not that I have recognized anything, ever. So stop looking at me like that.
And I'm not defensive, either.
Stolen heartlessly from the Ireneo's Memory blog.
raincoaster 